11.24.08 SOMEONE SHOULD GO TO JAIL FOR THIS
Remember back in July when I told you about Ace Ventura Jr., starring some little kid dressed like Jim Carrey? You probably repressed the memory. Regardless, it has a trailer out now, and thankfully, the project is going straight to DVD. But that doesn’t change the fact that they plucked some chubby kid out of obscurity, encouraged him in all his annoying eccentricities, gave him stupid hair, probably paid him just enough to support his drug habit through age 18, and then released him back into society. Pet detectives don’t carry guns do they? We should probably lock this kid up right now as a preventative measure like the wolfman. Before he becomes Teen Ace Ventura: Pet Mutilator. Also: him wearing a wifebeater in most of these scenes could be considered foreshadowing.

[via Cinematical]

There are 31 comments about:
SOMEONE SHOULD GO TO JAIL FOR THIS
It saddens me we can’t beat kids.
I thought society hated the fuck out of fat kids?
I want to kick the shit out of this kid.
Damn, they stole my idea. Except mine was “Hannibal Lechter Jr.”
If this foreshadows anything, I thinks it’s beastiality.
True story: Danny Bonaduce was turned down for this role.
This kid’s DVD release party will feature a clown, some balloons and a fat kid.
How come when I steal a pussy they call it “rape”? And I don’t have some little fat kid I can poke in the stomach chasing me….no, I just get fat cops, and poking them I have come to discover is called. “assault.”
“Tabbys been nabbied!” That is what I am calling “rape” from now on.
DVD extras include sweating and heavy breathing.
If they don’t bust in on this kid drinking from a Hershey’s Syrup bottle, this movie is DEAD2HIM.
This trailer left out the best part of the movie, where Ace Jr. does the “truffle shuffle.”
I feel even worse for the kid they found to play young Tone Loc.
The Mighty Feklahr understands that Kavin Bacon plays the “pederast dormitory guard”…ALL RIGHTY THEN!
I don’t really, Tone Loc (playing himself) needs work.
This movie is going to have all of the charm of Sacha Baron Cohen and prison rape all rolled into one.
His Mother was Ray Finkel.
ht tp://ww w.christiansagainstcartoons.com/
Maybe these people will picket the movie for us!
The only animals I want to see in young Ace are gerbils and maybe some donkeys
Fek, that is awesome.
Bruns:
Christians-1
Photoshop-0
This could turn into a franchise with various sequels based on popular films:
“Ace Ventura Jr.: Mental Defective” (Tropic Thunder)
“Ace Ventura Jr.: Prime Directive” (Star Trek)
“Ace Ventura Jr.: Penis Effective” (Viagra ad)
Fek, I want to find whichever misguided, neo-Christian, fat-assed housewife writes that site and make fuck in her eye sockets.
That is all.
I can only imagine how terrible this is going to be… because i won’t be fucking watching it
Whakety schmakety doo.
OMG Fek:
“Permitting your child to lie in a bed covered in Hello Kitty dolls, you are allowing her to lie in a mock Egyptian burial chamber!”
That link is AWESOME.
Hello Anubis
all i can honestly say to this is what the fucking hell is this and why the fuck was that little girl laughing in the behind the scenes crap. you’re not funny and that fat little homo isn’t funny either. i hate this.
Tell us how you really feel, Bank
Chris Hansen needs to go after the group of people making this.
Who’s the chick in the Video still pic?
Looks like a grown up Ellen Page.
This is going to be great. Expectations have really rose since Mask Jr. got so much critical acclaim.
Comment on this post:
You must be logged in to post a comment. Not yet a member, register for free.