11.07.08 FAT KID FROM SANDLOT IS A SCIENTOLOGIST

I thought he became a pro wrestler under the moniker “The Great Hambino”.

Praise Xenu for this smack!

Boosh Magazine? I smell a Klingon lawsuit brewing.

Ever feel depressed and/or happy? Tired of paying property taxes? Did you know gullible is NOT in the dictionary? Then we have a solution for your troubled and/or happy life – declare your home as a Scientology Center! For just $29,399.83, we will send you everything you need to bring our church to your living room!

I’d bareback a rabid bear and shoot up with molasses before I’d take part in any act of kindness.

When will the Scientologists follow most cult trends; drink the magic kool-aid, fuck off, and die.

I’d rather find out what happened to the Mastiff from The Sandlot. Did he convert to Scientology too? Or aren’t dogs allowed to believe in Lord Xenu????

Why didn’t they cast this tubby dunce as the eponymous antagonist in Yeti?

/two posts, one “joke”

All those freckles remind me of that famous doodie cartoon with the shit splatter artwork. Or this. Nija poo fight: http://www.doodie.com/ninja.php

Duck, Hollywood Ninja!

Ah those are thetans, I always thought they were freckles.

Clearly he’s not a Beverly Hills Ninja, is he now.

I was driving behind a Scientologist the other day. They had a little yellow placard in the back window that said “Unvaccinated Baby On Board”.

They also had a bumper sticker that said “Ask Me About Scientology (exact change appreciated)”

I guess when you’re uglier than the inside of a manatee’s butthole, you have to cling to whatever religion till take you.

Scientology: Replacing Science with Ridiculous Bullshit Scince 1954.

Scientography: The Truth About Where Countries Are

Whatch my magic trick;
Now you Xenu…
{shoots scientologist fuckstink in temple with nailgun}
Now you don’t!
TA-DAAAAAH!

Only Scientology can answer life’s biggest question: Where in the world is Carmen Sandiego?

I like typos,
yes I do!
I like typos,
now fuck off!

Scientology: BFF’s with Bigfoot

I think Dino Pope is the Pope of Scientology!!!
Xenu?

Scientology: We do CNN’s hologram

Scientology: We shot “The Magic Bullet”

Scientology: Where the Earth is flat

Scientology: Alexander Graham Bell was a witch

Scientology Center Los Feliz: We Know*

*where they hide the snacks

Scientology: It’s bigger than Nino Brown

Scientology: Where you don’t ever have to say grace before a meal. Dig in Fatty-Fat McLardass

What the hell is he promoting: Scientology or freak nasty sex? With quotes like that half the people that showed up are going to be pissed off, one way or another.

<== Dino Pope only reveals the mystery to those that walk the true path.
{lays on back, opens robe}
Now, stomp on my balls!!

Scientology: There is no “grey”

Scientology: Psst. We have hover boards.

I’ve recently converted to Scientapathy.

Scientology: now with less science than ever!

Scientology: We use orphan tears and dandruff in our snow globes.

Stoney – you too? Whatever.

Scientology: Where Diet Dr. Pepper taste exactly like regular Dr. Pepper

Scientology: We’ll only put the tip in.

Scientology: Where gun-rape is not only accepted, but loved

Scientology: A Series of Tubes Filled with Utter Bullshit and Distain for Reason

Scientology: Where you never have to ask for a reach around.

Stoney – you too? Whatever.

Yep.

I was gonna italicize, but fuck that shit.

Scientology: S’more of what?

Scientology: Free Jetpack with Every Soul Lost

Scientology: We pickled “The Beast”

Scientology: We’ll always give you a courtesy tap.

Scientology: No matter how big the thumb

Scientology: No, We’re Fucking Serious, Dude.

Scientology: We do anal, but prep the area first

Scientology: Where the offering plates accept all major credit cards.