AN AWESOME FIGHT SCENE
11.11.08This is an awesome fight scene. I don’t know what movie it comes from, but I must reiterate, it is awesome. Make sure to watch until the end, because the last line is the kicker. If you can’t watch the video at work, here’s a partial transcript:
GUY 1: AHHH!
GUY 2: HUUUHHH!
GUY 1: YAAAAH!
GUY 2: HEEYAAAAH!
GUY 1: HUH!
GUY 2: HUH!
GUY 1: YAAAAAAA!
GUY 2: AHHHHHHH!
GIRL enters
GIRL: HAAA
GUY 1: YAAAAAH!
GUY 2: AAAAAAH!
GIRL: YAAAAAAAAH!
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So bad its great
“Stop hitting me, my fucking eye was just ripped out!”
I’m 5 seconds in, and it’s already awful.
I believe the entire clip was recorded in reverse.
I’ve seen that movie.
Girl? That’s a man, baby.
The actors got a little suspicious when the fight choreographer walked in carrying He-Man and Skeletor action figures and started banging them together while making fighting noises with his mouth.
It’s always a shame when both of your eyes are accidentally punctured in two separate instances within the span of 2 minutes.
This post must have taken a long time to write, Vance.
One more example of how much shit sucked in the 80′s.
Really, if you are one of those assbags that talks about 80′s retro being cool, you should be fucked to death with a blowtorch.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0111552/ one of the absolute worst movies ever…
My 30 seconds of snooping has revealed this movie as being named Undefeatable. Here is IMDB’s synopsis:
Kristi Jones (Cynthia Rothrock) avenges her sister’s death at the hands of a crazed martial arts rapist.
NO. FUCKING. KIDDING.
What ripped his eye out when his face hit the wall? Did somebody squirt some superglue on there or something?
They learned from the classics:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z1eFdUSnaQM
I hope my tombstone features the words “crazed martial arts rapist” in no specific order.
I raped martial arts once, once.
The highest ranking one can achieve as a martial arts rapist is Easy-Release Belt.
Stingray: I think my character would carry a knife in this scene.
Prop guy: We don’t have any knives on set.
Stingray: Well, find one!
*prop guy leaves; returns 5 minutes later; hands knife to Stingray*
Stingray: Dude, was this the cake knife from that birthday party earlier? It still has chocolate icing on it.
Director: And…..Action!
The best defense against a martial arts rapist is to learn Aikido-means-no.
Karate training: Breaking boards
Martial Arts Rapist Training: Breaking broads.
*Jacktion! adds “crazed martial arts rapist” to his list of awesome band names*
I have that EXACT same knife, I found it in some bushes when I lived downtown. I always assumed it was used in a murder then stashed, but maybe someone just threw it out after they saw that movie.
DrJones, get yourself a picture of someone covering their heart as an avatar, STAT!
[points to ass]
Martial Arts Rape here
[points to crotch]
Martial Arts Rape here
[points to mouth]
Martial Arts Rape never here, understand?
there are more efficient ways to decide who has to fold all the coats…but this way is better.
This clip isn’t as good as the greatest movie stunt of all time (Vince chose not to use it in the free-for-all)
http://tinyurl.com/5epvdr
Are all warehouse workers martial artists? Because that seems to be the only place that martial arts battles take place anymore.
I’ll bet that’s also a partial transcript of a deleted scene between Spock and Kirk in the upcoming Star Trek film.
Where does the girl fit in, Donk?
Uhura walks in and gets a glimpse of Kirk’s package, Jack!.
Needs more pommel horse. I stumbled across this a couple of weeks ago and can’t for the life of me remember how. It had millions of hits so i presumed it was old news. Now that Vance has posted it, i know it is.
Whakety Schmakety doo.
Me Three!!!
ht tp://engrishfunny.com/
I disagree actually the fight scene in the remake of Barry Gordys The Last Dragon between Bruce Leroy (played by Nic Cannon most likely ) and Shonuf (played by Samuel L. Mutha fuckin Jackson) is soon to replace this marvel of modern cinema. And if Mariah plays the female lead i will honestly stab Nic Cannon in his face with the knife from this shitty movie until the authorities pump my body so full of lead i’ll have to use my dick for a pencil .
I twied wicking a naif ath tha thart of a fwight. It wathn’t menathing. Juth methy.
actually i already use my dick like a pencil so nevermind the metphore. but i will stab nic cannon….
I screwed up my sound card so I could not hear the last two lines. Whatever it was, I can’t imagine it justifying having to sit through the previous three minutes to hear it.
If Gina Curano comes within 30 feet of me, I’m gonna be a mixed martial artist raper.
Just sayin’.
Or rapist. Or rapier. Wait…
fuck it
Who the hell is buying this round of boots?
Dangnabbit! I had it right the first flippin’ time. Shuckeydarns!
I’m trying to post without swearing for a while.
Words fail me. As apparently they do these two moe’s.
Wait, didn’t the Swayze rip the mullet guy’s throat out already?
SPECIAL REPORT:
Why did that guy’s eye get stuck to the wall and ripped out for no reason? According to a friend of mine that saw this WHOLE movie:
“it’s karma kicking his ass. cause he poked out the eyeballs of his victims. apparently his wife left him and every woman that barely resembles her he kills and pops her eyes out.”
Now back to our regularly scheduled programming.
Undefeatable? More like Unwatchable.
Crapbasket:
First thing: Movie was made in 94, so it’s a lot closer than you think^_~
And two: There was a nail sticking out of the wall, that’s what he impaled his eye on the first time.
Hilarious thing about this movie: With the exception of Cynthia Rothrock and some guy that works as a stuntman, This was for pretty much the rest of the cast their last (or only!) film. How could one movie kill so many careers?
Oh yeah, I watched it, and I can see why…
Amendment to prior comment; Well then fuck 1994 as well.
I tried to look this movie up on IMdb, and IMdb told me to, “Go fuck yourself.”
The Mighty Feklahr is astonished that you all have mentioned the retards in this clip, but not the kangaroos!
Oh, fuck, J! If we can get our hands on some T Rex DNA, we can try to splice it with retard DNA and make DINOTARDS to fight the kangareese! Can you imagine it? Big, skulking retards with pointy teeth and little eety beety arms!
This was so bad, I kept expecting Nic Cage to run up in a bear suit and punch that bitch out.
There! Now that is some muthafuckin innovation. That is why you guys keep me around, and why Lince never bans His account on Upro…
I think this is Vance’s way of telling us that his eyes have been ripped out, and he’s not posting anything else today.
On the cutting room floor, Andrew Eyeverson’s scene.
The bad guy broke out with a bad case of Heyeves.
I like where you’re going with that Fek. Could you imagine the power those little arms could generate?
I think Vince is lost in Pine’s eyes and Quinto’s bowl cut.
Eye don’t know about you, but eye keyenda leyeked it.
OH! OH! And we can get that stupid fat guy from Return of the Jedi to tend the Dinotards under Jabba’s Palace!
(What was that stupid fat guy’s name, again? Geroge Lucsa, or sumpin…)
At least he didn’t get his brown eye poked.
Rancor Keeper was my best man.
The Dinotards will demolish the Roos! We will have to get something better for them to fight. Like world hunger. Peace talks with Palestine. Or Mandatory Abortion.
Fek, that dude’s name is Malakili.
Gosh darn if I don’t love Wiki.
Fek, not if you splice the Roos with some Yeti DNA…
A Dinotards Vs. King Kong flick may get Peter Jackson’s juices flowin’. We’ve already seen Kong beat up three regular T-Rex’s at once, so this is the next logical step.
How about King Kong vs Dinotard vs Yetiroo?
THREE WAY DANCE! THREE WAY DANCE! THREE WAY DANCE!
Well, boys, we have our main event! Let’s get some T Rex and Yeti DNA!
…
Dor sho gha!
Well, the good news is that there is a TON of retard DNA on Chod’s sheets!
I’m calling “not its” for having to masturbate the T Rex or Yeti. I think some2ti8lgha5npohbnea
*brain explodes from lack of swearing in posts*
New up
The best thing ever was that before she showed up on the scene, I was thinking to myself, “This fight scene would only be complete if the girl turns out to be Cynthia Rothrock”.
Does the opening shot not look like Michael Douglas going full retard?