A court in LA has barred the estate of J.R.R. Tolkien from seeking punitive damages from New Line Cinemas in their suit over Lord of the Rings. Keep in mind, punitive damages is when someone is ordered to pay money above and beyond what they actually owe as punishment for what they did and as a warning to others. The estate still seeks compensatory damages in excess of $150 million.
Tolkien’s heirs claim New Line Cinema has failed to pay any royalties from the estimated $6 billion they say the movie has grossed worldwide.
The lawsuit claims New Line sent millions of dollars to Time Warner Inc.‘s AOL, improperly claiming they were for advertising expenses. The lawsuit also claims the studio built production offices and facilities in New Zealand and listed them as expenses for the “Lord of the Rings” films, although the heirs claim they are now being used for other New Line projects.
Besides damages, the lawsuit seeks a court order that would terminate New Line’s rights to make a two-film prequel based on “The Hobbit.”
Guillermo del Toro has signed on to direct that film and its sequel in New Zealand alongside executive producer Peter Jackson. [Yahoo/AP]
Seeing as how Guillermo del Toro and Peter Jackson are both big fat guys with beards, I think their best strategy here would be to roll into court with a couple of big beer steins from which they could drink while joining arm in arm to lead the crowd in a merry sing along. No one could rule against a fat drunk Santa Claus singing a song. No deal if they’re skinny now, that shit’s creepy.


OMG! If He goes with them, He could finally realize His dream of the FAT PEOPLE SIT IN!
HELL NO, WE WON’T GO! WE’RE TO FAT TO GET OFF THE FLOOR!
Come on, the mental imagery is GREAT! Fat people laying around everywhere, 10 cops dragging off ONE PERSON at a time, The mighty Feklahr with a “Pizza By The Slice” truck making money hand over fist…FUCK! We can invite Harry Knowles, too!
The judge will find 26 men in the courtroom in contempt because they won’t stop wheezing.
I stake my reputation as a Filmdrunkard on this one, trust me:
dirtyhairy.blogspot.com/2008/09/new-dream-cunt-punch.html
I know erswi is gonna give me an ear full for the USC/Big 12 thing. I think I’ll pick LSU to win it all, just to piss him off. That seems to be what it takes for a team to lose.
In a large conference room, members of the press, lawyers, and representatives of the Tolkien estate sit patiently as they wait for a New Line spokesperson to take the podium.
After several minutes, a well dressed man slowly positions himself behind the microphone. He takes a sip of water, adjusts the microphone, and checks his note cards. After clearing his throat, he begins speaking.
“Members of the press and distinguished guests. I have the following statement to present to you on behalf of New Line Cinema.” He unfolds a tablet-size sheet of paper. “To the estate of JRR Tolkien – you are cordially invited to go fuck yourselves. Thank you.”
After many months of heated arguments and fervent debate, the two parties finally settled. They’ll get the Baconator and the volcano taco.
Fek, epic.
I’m not entirely sure the Tolkien estate knows what they’re doing here. Provided they win the lawsuit, they’ll be given what the lawyers refer call “a motherfucking shit-ton” of money. If New Line proceeds with making two Hobbit movies, they’ll have what’s called a “legal precedent” there to ensure they get paid again. However, if their lawsuit blocks the production of these Hobbit movies; future revenue streams for them will get “fucked”.
Sorry about all the legal mumbo-jumbo.
I think I’ll have tuna pie for lunch.
QAPLAH!
Skinny Peter Jackson < Hans Gruber.
Lord of the Onion Rings!
Haven’t i seen a picture of these two in the Guiness Book of World Records where they were riding these little motorcycles?
I think the thing that finally pushed the estate to sue was the line item expense of $40,000 for “Mr. Jackson’s personal grooming products.”
Wow, if He had realized that all He had to do was not shave or cut His hair to become a famous and wealthy movie director, He would have started on that snuff film a LONG time ago!
Part of the lawsuit, claiming New Line grossly overinflated their craft services cost was also thrown out of court after the defense used the “have you looked at Peter Jackson?” defense.
Kurg, consider yerself NOMMED!
Peter Jackson lost all that weight so as to not be recognized in public after King Kong took such a huge shit in the mouth of America. That and he had been banned from The Foxy Lady for being too “handsy”.
Pictured: The “banned” list from the local buffet.
A nice simulation of Peter Jackson’s manboobs. Point, click, giggle. For the sake of science. http://paitouch.appspot.com/
New up.
So, apparently the estate of JRR Tolkien can eat a bag of fucking dicks.