Last week I posted the first trailer for the Matrix, er, Wanted, uh, I mean The Crow. Dang! I mean Max Payne. This is the international trailer. It’s basically the same as the American trailer, except it doesn’t shave down there and lets you pee on it after sex. So I’ve heard.
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I’m more interested in legal news involving The Watchmen than anything involving Max Payne. Honest to Betsy.
Betsy knows when you’re lying.
In Germany, this movie is being released as Über Ouchie.
If JHC lied, his dad would totally kill him. Oh wait…
JHC lied for your sins.
J’s dad and my mom should get together.
The British version of this trailer is going to be cut significantly to keep British kids from getting the idea that they’re trying to glorify being Mark Wahlberg.
This trailer comes with a short stack of blueberry pancakes.
If this is just like the video game, then I can pause it for a bong session.
No one will ever take the place of your father, sweetie. But thanks for thinking of me.
I’m off to bake some cookies now Chino. Be good.
Damn, my mom never bakes cookies for me.
S’up witchoo suckas? I’m still alive and shit. Chillin in Tex-ASS, waiting to head back into the 504 tonight. I do hear that we have power at my house now so at least I can get my drunk on when I get back.
Why so serious?
erswi, you missed a good McCain Palin thread. Check it out. We’re glad you’re safe.
Hi Erswi! Glad you are okay.
GPP: my mom doesn’t bake me cookies. She buys them. And they aren’t even Oreos. She buys Hydrox. :(
I dont know whats worse ers, the threat of you city being inundated with sewage and drowed persons, or seeking safety in Texas…
…unless you were in Austin, Austin is cool.
Glad to see you R.E.O. Speedwagoned that fucker Erswi.
HYDROXXXXXXXXX!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Where in the void is fek BTK? Not worried, just wondering if I should seek shelter from the possibility of Grethor plummeting to earth.
Hydrox cookies make babies cry.
Hydrox are to Oreos what Thunderbird is to Boone’s Farm Strawberry Hill.
Chino, sounds like your mom was afraid you’d get Double Stuft.
Max Paine – the rare movie title whose porn equivalent is the exact same (unless you count Max Painal)
Max Taint
I always get double stuffed. I’m a ho like that.
Sounds like you’re a HoHo.
The universal equalizer for Mark Wahlberg’s continued success? His penis looks like cold jumbo shrimp.
C-Dog, Fek’s out for the week. He’s had a death in the family.
Mark Wahlberg is a dick and that turtleneck sweater is the foreskin.
Mark Wahlberg is a bizarro Matt Damon
Mark Wahlberg poses in my underwear and then calls me gay for watching.
Well, that’s cast rather a pall over the evening, hasn’t it?
Mark Wahlberg is so cool that he can knock people blind with a stick.
Chodin is so cool that he can knock out blind people with a cane.
Mark Wahlberg called me a freak when I said I have a superfluous dick.
It’s a shame to think about what I would do to Mila Kunis and then hear her talk and it’s Meg.
Mark Wahlberg loves the cock.
Wow, this thread is deader than Fek’s….nevermind. Too soon.
*Whispers*
PenisDurstDid you just see that tumbleweed, Donk? I didn’t think they could travel the internet.
Goddamnit Donk. Next time don’t whisper that shit in my ear. You got me all hot and bothered.
I hear Bristol Palin keeps a bald eagle.
Its true. But only for egg production. Have you ever had scrambled bald eagle? Delicious.
Oh, and she’s a big clubber.
Not on the party scene, the baby seal scene.
I hear she shaves her pussy, too.
Heidi Klum is big in the baby Seal scene.
I don’t know if the audio that goes with that is enough to distract you from a strobe-induced seizure, but I only made it partway through. Now there’s a mess on my floor.
I used to be Dr. Mooseknuckle…but from here on out I will only answer to Sean Javon Seis Nuevo. It took a week to log back on and I have to say…
LIFE WELL SPENT.
And I use to be a woman.
I vaguely remember playing the game on my computer a long time ago, but I don’t remember the flying thingies. I can’t believe they’re not staying true to the original story. What has good literature become?
Pauly’s a chick? Oh, wait, I read that wrong.
Hey Pauly, is that the guy from Double Dragon?
Is this the same Max from Tyler Perry’s House of Payne?
I like the Spanglish version: “Mas Peen”
Knob, no it’s Damon Wayans.
DUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURST!!!
damn that felt good
From what I have gathered from dealing with demons on film, is that you just have to kick them in the nards.
The Wolfman’s got nards.
This is eerily similar to Constantine. And by eerily I mean why do black people play the gatekeeper?
“Duh Davel is builfing his arm’e.”
That’s racist.
And I love it.
*spoiler alert* The demons in the movie are really plants trying to kill Mark Wahlberg.