Thanks to some Pulitzer-worthy reporting by IGN and their “trusted source”, the blogosphere has learned that Angelina Jolie may have to drop out of Edwin A. Salt.
You may remember that Edwin A. Salt was the spy thriller to which Tom Cruise was originally attached. They had recently replaced him with Jolie and were planning to re-write the title and parts of the script to accommodate the gender change (all the standing-up-to-pee scenes had to go… ha, just kidding, it was written for Tom Cruise! Kazam!).
We’ve been informed that Jolie may have to drop out due to the needs of her newborn twins and thus might not be able to meet the picture’s start date. While it’s not official yet, Jolie’s departure from Salt certainly appears likely.
If Jolie does indeed drop out of the project then the studio is expected to go back out to male stars for the title role.
Please, no man could possibly replace Angelina Jolie. Except maybe Clive Owen. I’d totally bone that guy.
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![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/haddaway-what-is-love-150x150.jpg)
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Funny, it’s usually Jolie’s twins that make me want to see her movies.
*waits for low five*
Edward Morton seems like a natural for this part.
*low five*
Jolie’s “twins” just reminded me:
HAPPY LARGE HADRON COLLIDER DAY!
“We’ve been informed that Jolie may have to drop out due to the needs of her newborn twins”
This sounds like every 15 year old girl in Iowa…
Robo-you spelled “hard on” incorrectly, yIntagh!
Robo, was it the twins or her black hole?
HAPPY LARGE HADRON COLLIDER DAY!
That’s right! When are we due to implode? I should call home and tell my 4 month old son to hurry up and find someone to have sex with before it’s too late.
He better not touch my wife – I’ll cut him.
This only happened because Shia Lebouf was set to co-star and whenever he cries, Angelina’s nipples leak.
Stoney seems to be able to work, even with the needs of his newborn. Angelina, YOU LAZY BITCH!
I’m sure I’ll take a flogging for this, but I don’t think Angelina is nearly as good looking as say Megan Fox, Carla Gugino, or your mom.
I would be willing to commit suicide if I knew that I was going to be reincarnated as Jolie’s breast pump.
I need to apologize to Vince. I’ve been railing on him to end the sausage fest and when he does we get a dozen comments. Bring on the ghey! Oooga.
You mean Brad Pitt, Rot?
JHC, Jolie’s hawtness is now something that mere mortals can barely comprehend…sorta like the fabric of time or how Jenna Jameson manages to keep her internal organs from falling out of her bung. That being said, I would let Carla Gugino poop in my mouth just so I could say I met her.
Despite that this movie is yet to even be made, I’m already thinking sequel. How about Edwin A. Salt With A Deadly Weapon? Or maybe they give the titular character a sidekick named Chester N. Battery and call the sequel A. Salt N. Battery
I’m with Jesus. (not literally)
Perhaps Edwin B. Salt?
Vince, I have an honest question.
What the fuck does “Film Drunk: Where the internet IS like a big truck” mean?
Porn version will be called Slammin A. Ssault.
They should replace her with Clive Owen, but keep it written for a woman. He can pull it off. Jolie would get her acting skills Pwen’d.
JHC, obviously Vince is a big fan of Coal Chamber. They do have a couple good songs, but all in all tehy suck. Vince has shitty taste in music.
Edwin A. Salt 2: The Senses
I heard Tom Cruise backed out initially because of the flashback scene of high school football players throwing him over their shoulders for good luck.
I hear they’re talking to Val Kilmer because his tits are almost as big (apparently, instead of milk, they’re filled with mojitos).
New Up! More Ghey!
What the fuck does “Film Drunk: Where the internet IS like a big truck” mean?
I think Vince is refuting Ted Stevens and saying that this site backs up to your house and takes a dump.