08.14.08 PLAYBOY IS A GYP

That Dana White chick is hawt!

Still debating whether I’d rather see Anna Faris naked or at a Wisconsin Applebees where she fucking belongs.  

Hate to have to be correction chimp here but, hot chick the doesn’t get naked?

Don’t look at me like that! The only reason I bring it up is I have nothing else to say about this.

The rise of Guns and Roses??!?! what is it, 1986 or something?

They should have at least superimposed her head on a past playmate of African descent.

This makes sense, because we’ll continue to view the star of The Hot Chick, Just Friends and Scary Movies 1-4 with nothing but respect.

Meh.  I’d rather see her pose for Airheads Who Love Anal, or B-Listers That Like Butthole Pleasures.  That’s just me though.  Playboy is for suckahs.

Hate to have to be correction chimp here but, hot chick the doesn’t get naked?

You actually DO read Playboy for the articles, don’t you, professor Nerdlestone?  

At what point does someone show Anna Faris clips of Isla Fisher roles and say, "See how she mixes cute and quirky with actual humor?"

J, when you get your next copy of Airheads Who Love Anal in would you mind sending me the subscription card? It’s for a friend.*

*my penis

Stoney, last month there was a great piece of short fiction about . . .

NO! I LIKE THE NAKED TITTIES, YOU JACKASS!!!!

::does his best Olsen twin/monchichi impersonation::

You got it dude! 

I will send you the subscription card, Erswi.

Wait, JHC, do you realize you just made me think about Full House babies and anal? I am scarred for fucking life,thanks

Sorry.  I guess I just figured everyone thought like that already.

I would not object to seeing Bob Saget cornhole the Olsen twins.

<— That’s better.  Less clutter, more udder. mmmm

This officially leaves Readers Digest as the last remaining magazine to not showcase Keeley Hazell’s boobs.

You’re probably right about that Burnsy, since her brazierre designer was featured in Popular Mechanics last month. Good article. Very informative.

Burnsy, you havent seen the Readers Digest centerfolds?

I think I found the reason she’s not naked.  Thanks to her hair blocking the title, you’ve accidentally confused PLANBOY for Playboy.  The article inside is all about Anna Faris telling you how to better manage your time and set goals.

Over/Under on how many Playboy readers looked at the front page and thought they were gonna see a naked MMA chick named Dana White?  I’ll put it at 10.

Donk, put me down for a hundy on the overs.  Most dudes that would rather read Playboy instead of Huslter or Penthouse are retards idiots morons imbeciles gay.  In which case, they may buy it for that very reason.

I’ll be that cliché and admit that I read Playboy for the articles. The internet long ago made magazines obsolete as jack off material.

Anyone seen my copy of DogFancy?