MORGAN FREEMAN IS GETTING DIVORCED
08.07.08
Okay, okay, I know this is a movie blog not a celebrity blog, but I’ve always thought of Morgan Freeman as more of a movie star than a celebrity </cheap rationalization>
The news is that Morgan Freeman’s wife of 24 years, Myrna Colley-Lee, has filed for divorce. Considering Morgan Freeman was recently in a car crash with an unknown woman late at night, you can imagine the kind of speculation this will spark.
But I’m sure this is just a coincidence. I know if I was planning to file for divorce I’d wait until my spouse was in the hospital – that’s the perfect time. That way you don’t have to hang around some boring ass hospital all day. Does this place even have cable? Smell ya later, losers.
[via Yahoo - Thanks, Fek]
TAGS: MORGAN FREEMAN
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Is his wife entitled to half of his freckles?
Damn, could things get any worse for Sidney Poitier?
The first thing you do if you’re Morgan Freeman and you just got a divorce? March of the Asian Twins.
That is the picture caption of the year Vince.
Feeman: "No baby, no see, I crashed because I was telling this bitch how much I fucking loved you."
If only Morgan were working on a Michael Bay movie he’d have an airtight defense.
This just frees him up to be Obama’s alibi whenever there is hot tail around the White House.
Today, the Easy Reader reads a pre-nup.
Now he finally gets ro find out what being a free man is all about. But not for free.
Myrna Colley-Lee: " Morgan, I just don’t know if I can handle this marriage now that we’ve made more than God off of Batman. "
"I have to remind myself that some birds aren’t meant to be caged. Their feathers are just too bright. And when they fly away, they take your kids and half of your shit."
The unidentified woman in his car was Christian Bale’s sister. That Lucius is a real problem-solver, I tell you, even if he didn’t quite get this one 100% right.
Look at my eyebrows! Look at my eyebrows!
Morgan Freeman: Good at acting, not so good at "Connect the Dots."
Morgan just signed a deal to narrate his divorce hearings.
Freeman: "Look Myrna, it was raining and so I picked her up. She didn’t say anything the whole car ride, and then when I crashed, she was gone! All she left behind was a sweater…BOO MYRNA!!! BOO BITCH!!! THAT’S FUCKING SCARY, AIN’T IT?"
Demaris Meyer needs to take some lessons from Sienna Miller. It’s "have your boobs fondled in public while vacationing in Italy," not "go demolition derby-ing with your own car."
Morgan Freeman’s freckle braille reads "PWNED"
He went down to the crossroads at midnight to sell his soul, but bitch couldn’t read the map. But it looks like he must have made it there eventually, given this news.
At least now Morgan can mark "crashing a car while getting head" off his fucking bucket list.
Gene, I had "Morgan Freeman’s freckles spell out Single and Ready to Mingle in braille" when I luckily refreshed.
If you can pick up a bitch in a ’97 Maxima, she’a a keeper.
So I guess when he was joking with the EMTs about how this would affect his swing, he wasn’t talking about golf after all.
Reading this thread is so much better when you read every comment in Morgan Freeman’s voice. Try it. I’ll wait.
See? Imagination lets you create all sorts of scenarios. Isn’t this fun?
UnWanted?
Dude rules, but if he voice-overs during sex that would be creepy.
Where he lives, out in the Clarksdale/delta area of Mississippi … a ’97 Maxima is an Escalade.
P.S. He is changing his name to Incarceratedman b/c he hearts irony.
Great minds, Burnsy. Well, similar at least.
After she’s done with him, he’ll be Lessgan Freeman, know what I mean? Get it?
Morgan Freeman, Brad Pitt and Billy Crudup star in… Three Guys I Think Are Pretty Fucking Cool.
Look out ladies of Mississippi, Morgan the Organ is on the prowl.
Morgan and Brad Pitt only act the way they do because they’re still making up for the gay spread by Kevin Spacey on the set of Seven.
"I know if I was planning to file for divorce I’d wait until my spouse was in the hospital – that’s the perfect time."
Newt?
Morgan Freeman is just imagining Myrna’s head in the box.
I thought Kevin Spacey was awesome in Se7en. For a fag, I mean.
Morgan looks like he told the girl he loved her so he could get laid.
At least now Morgan can mark "crashing a car while getting head" off his fucking bucket list.
Aww, man. I didn’t know that you could have two lists. I better get to work on my fucking list, then.
Don’t worry, Morgan — round up your old Army buddies (Denzel Washington, Andre Braugher, Matthew Broderick) and go out for a drinkin’ night to get her off your mind.
PS, I see from IMDB that there is a character in Glory called "Private Sharts." This is historically inaccurate because there are no private sharts in the trenches.
There is a character in Glory Hole named Short Privates. Coincidence?
The sequel for Se7en will now be called Thre3.5
Since it’s now reported that the Maxima belonged to the woman, not to Morgan motherfuckin’ Freeman, it begs the question of what he does drive. I’m betting it’s a ’77 de Ville with funky rims and plenty of Gangsta Air on the inside. Sheeeeeit!
I’m betting Morgan normally has a white woman drive him everywhere.
New Up!