
After the jump I’ve got video of Carmen Electra putting clothes on (sort of) just long enough to introduce a new clip from Disaster Movie, in which she wrestles Kim Kardashian and does other stuff that hilariously references pop culture. Now, I know that when you’re a 36-year-old former Playmate with little acting experience, you’re probably not getting offered the best roles. You probably want to cash in in the next few years while people still care about seeing you naked. But Carmen, being in a Seltzer-Friedberg joint is just embarrassing. It’s degrading, it’s harmful to your career, and in the end, probably doesn’t make you that much money.
I have a much better idea: we get you, me, a video camera, and 10 midgets to come on your face while I film it. We’ll call it Carmen Electra’s Midget Bukakke Boogaloo and sell DVDs on late night television between Girls Gone Wild spots. We’ll split the profits 70-30 (after all, my reputation is on the line here). I’m telling you babe, this is your retirement plan.



I would gladly pay into her 401k, if it involved K-Y, a certain Cuban Missile, and, to paraphrase Pauly Dangerously, "to be immortal is to be able to bang Carmen Electra without a rubber".
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Why do they have to be midgets? Thats a turn off. I’d prefer lepers.
The worst part is that I bet Carmen Electra thinks she has a great sense of humor because she’s in comedies. That’s like R. Kelly thinking he’s 15 just because of the films he’s been in.
The Mighty Fek’lhr has another prophecy!
When He watches this clip, there will be a "BONG!!!!!!!!" sound shortly thereafter!!!
Carmen Electra’s greatest bit of acting? Pretending shes not over 40! Who knew?*
I’ll tell you who knew… Dave Navarro. All of her extra skin is bunched up in snatch. It’s like having sex with a bag of giblets.
I can’t believe it. I’ve run out of jokes about Seltzer and Friedberg. They won.
I don’t know what’s up, but not even my dick enjoyed that clip.
I blew the engine on my 95 Escort station wagon last week and can’t afford the down payment on a fucking KIA right now, so please Seltzer-Friedberg, holla atcha boy!
Kurgan — are you a Lovelace? ‘Cause I can only get a lawnmower engine into my throat.
Kudos!
No gag reflex, that’s all. been that way since my uncle gave me his "bottle" when i was 4 months old.
I think at this point, I’d rather see Carmen Miranda naked (present day)
I’d be scared that just being in the same room with Carmen Electra that I’d get Navarro/Rodman cooties.
I’d like to take Carmen Electra out to dinner and then afterwards ask her to rate my performance for "trying to not act like all I want to do is fuck you after dinner".
Carmen Electra makes me want to do two things:
1) Beat off
2) Beat women
Why does the Batman play a guitar? I was with them until that point.
JHC, you are totally overlooking Prince cooties.
State Fair starts Friday!!!
Lemonade Tacos, gyros, and hick chicks from the sticks. Those bitches can fucking drink I tell ya. They never met a piss boot they didn’t like.
Do you guys personally know people who go to these shitty movies??? I was thiking about it, and I dont think I have one friend, or co-worker or ANYONE that goes to these shittastic movies. HOW DO THEY MAKE MONEY!?!?
Shit Eib. I forgot all about that little bastard. How long does it take for STD’s to die after the body there are in dies?
No reason, just asking.
SAT prep question, bitches:
Carmen Electra is to Angelina Jolie as Kevin Farley is to …
C) Michael Moore.
Extra bonus info: All four have the same cup size.
818, they just don’t admit to it. If you’d ask me if I’ve ever thought about fucking my Mom, I’d tell you no. Just sayin’.
Good cover, J.
You can’t let them find out that none of us have any friends outside of our little imaginary community.
Carmen Electra walks into a Hollywood bar frequented by studio execs. She looks around seductively at all the men in the room, who quickly quiet their conversations and pay full attention to her.
She says aloud: "You all know who I am. I’ve made a decent living from being a sex symbol, but that work is drying up. I need to keep my career going, which is why I’m here. You are the most powerful men in this town, and I need your help. In return, I will do ANYTHING you ask me to – once."
One of the execs says "Anything? Anything I ask?"
Carmen responds "Name it."
He waves her over. When she gets close, he writes down a number on a napkin. "This is the code to my front gate. Be there tomorrow at 8am and let yourself in."
"Oohh. Then what?" she asks?
He leans in to her ear and whispers "Paint my house."
Went over to With Leather, and noticed an ad there with a close-up of Hannah Montana that led to a poll asking if she was a lesbo.
UPROXXX!!!!
There’s just something about Carmen Electra’s career that makes me never want to call her.
Carmen Electra likes her movie roles, the opposite of her dicks.
This movie is has soaked up everything funny about this world. I can’t think of one funny comment to make…So I will wait for NewUP, and tickle my asshole.
*smells finger with a grin*
I miss the good old days when Jenny McCarthy and Pamela Anderson fake-wrestling while pretending to be Amber Tamblyn and friend was the cutting edge of comedy. Now it’s just Carmen Electra and Kim Gargantuass fake-wrestling while pretending to be other people. I don’t know, it just feels … derivative.
I’d like to have the last name "Electra," just so the chicks in the psych department would think I’m really Jung.
Rot, that would only work if you were their father.
Carmen Electra isn’t as dumb as she looks.
… but it’s close.
I wonder at what point of her career she thought the stage name "Carmen Electra" was a bad idea.
Meh, I’ve seen better acting while on a date with Chodin.
Fuck. Seriously, I’m so over these assholes I can’t think of a fucking thing.
Electra/Asylum.
The legal term for the attached trailer is Carmen Delicti. It will serve as proof in all 50 states that a cinematic crime has been committed.
Carmen Electra has a small line on her stomach that acts as a career hourglass. As soon as her boobs sag enough to reach that line, it’s all over.
Pauly…those were real tears, hombre. You ripped me.
Nice catch Donkey. And it’s not a problem since I always insist that they call me "daddy." Then, instead of sex, I ground them and make them wash my car. That’s my version of "auto-eroticism."
You know how Carmen Electra keeps getting movie roles, don’t you?
She FUCKS.
I bet Carmen Electra’s burps smell like Dave Navarro and her farts smell like Rodman.
This girl looks like she’s on the wrong end of a FilmDrunkard:
[tinyurl.com]
Good thing she changed her name from Puta Inamyazz.
It’s not like it’s hard to trick those girls anyway, Rotty. The average psych major is interested in the subject because her cat understands her better than her boyfriend.
I’m not putting my dick into anything who’s name sounds close to "Electric socket" ever again.
Burnsy, I love you today.
/end working :-)
That would be FUCKED Mangina! Do you realize what being in a movie with Carmen could do to those midget’s careers?
You’re fucking WRONG bro!
/return to work :-(
Burnsy, that’s the girl from Iowa!
She only fucks her cousins!!!I wouldn’t even toss Carmen Electra’s salad if you handed me a dental dam and a seafood bib.
new up!
The only way I’m going down on Carmen Electra, is if you give me scuba gear and a speargun.
if you give me scuba gear and a speargun.
Will you settle for a swirly-straw and a spork? I can hit the KFC drive-thru.
Carmen Electra doesn’t have a lazy eye; she just likes to keep the right one aimed at your dick.
New up.
I would like to see Carmen Electra’s Midget Bukkake Boogaloo, but I worry that midgets aren’t capable of producing enough semen. I reckon Kim Kardashian’s Anal Raping by Mr. Ed is a movie I would pay money to see.
Actually, I’ll bet these movies pay their "stars" pretty well. I think they do decently in terms of box office, and DVD too. Meet the Spartans was #1 for what, three weeks?