ERIC BANA WANTS TO MARRY A CAR
08.06.08
Eric Bana, whom you may remember as the Hulk before Ed Norton, or even better, as Chopper, is making his directorial debut with Love the Beast.
…a documentary about his 25-year love affair with a 1974 Ford Falcon Coupe.
Bana describes "Beast," which took him two years to shoot, as "an unexpectedly emotional journey" in which he explores the importance of friends, hobbies and what it means to live life to the fullest.
Doc includes cameos from talkshow host Dr. Phil and Brit auto-aficionado Jeremy Clarkson ("Top Gear"). [Variety]
Bana recently screened the film for a group of his old mates from high school who described it as "truly fantastic. And surprisingly touching. *cough* queer *cough, cough*"
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I had a love affair with an 1987 Olds Delta 88 in high school. Well, I got road head for the first time while in that car. The blowjob was God awful, but that car was pretty cherry.
The Mighty Fek’lhr threw a rod in His ’89 Chrysler Le Baron.
That probably doesn’t mean what many think.
Pommel Horse Penis. There’s 2 of them.
One for you, and one for your friend.
First road head was in an ’87 Nissan pickup. The head was OK, but the truck was pretty god-awful.
What do you want from me? It was a fuckin Nissan pickup!
The last time I had a surprisingly touching moment with high school friends, I ate by myself in the cafeteria.
Well dammit, I didn’t want to before, but now since I know he wants to marry that car, I have to fuck it. It’s for his own good. He needs to understand that you can’t make a Tahoe a housewife. His car is a slut.
Primer-gray, ’82 Oldsmobile Cutlass supreme. Aka, the Cuntless Supreme. Bought some sweet fuckin’ plastic hubcaps for that thing at AutoZone once.
Shit. How am I supposed to make jokes when JHC beats me to the concept? Fucking Nebraskans.
MW3!
If I was going to have an affair, it would be with a woman. I don’t have to worry about burning my dick on their exhaust pipes.
FEAR THE WEASEL MULLET MAN!!!
LOL, that’s funny, J! The Mighty One doesn’t even have to worry about His dick approaching a woman’s skin!!!
Jellybean Tempo Monk :(
Aimless checking in to represent MN.
And I’ll let you guys make the car jokes on this one.
That is all.
I used to have a 67 Chevy II that i babied for a few years until i flipped it while jerking off around this curve.
I can sure as shit tell you one thing, if I were going to have an affair with a car . . .
a. It wouldn’t be a fuckin 74 Ford Falcon.
b. It wouldn’t last 25 fuckin years. That’s not an affair, that’s a lifestyle.
Wow, man. My first car was a real piece of shit. 97 BMW convertible. I mean, can you imagine?
My former brother in law used to love his Suburban…literally.
http://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b18/frogbert777/0115100102080104032008042952ab42773.jpg?t=1218029656
I used to have a 87 Monte SS until my girl left me for some senior who drove a fucking Fiat.
Kurg-WOW.
Oh! If we’re talking about our first cars . . . 1979 Chrysler Lebaron. Real POC! It was even brown to go along with the theme. Keeping in mind I bought it in 94.
NEW UP
Kurg, can I at least have my camera back?
You guys are all suprisingly touching. Really, I had no idea. I’ll show myself out.
I only dated a guy for his car once, I thought if he has a 68′ GTO convertible he can’t be all bad. Then he would only let me drive on residential streets. Dick. Everyone knows all the good people to hit are in the city. God that car was awesome. Like driving a really fast tank. If you’ll excuse me for a moment, this has been suprisingly touching.
Ok. I’m gonna be serious douchebag for a minute…
You guys know that I’m totally into cars. I work on them, race them, have a business dealing with performance parts and tools. I also have an awesome group of friends that all share the hobby. At the core of the group are a couple guys who run a large parts business. They just told me last night that they’re moving the business from around the corner to a new facility 600 miles away. It’s good for them, but I’m kind of bummed about it.
This is not to say that the movie in question isn’t gay – it’s just kind of strange and coincidental that such a sappy concept so closely align with my current events…
And yes – it is my time of month. So fuck off and bring me my Haagen Das.
The first car I owned was a ’79 Monza 4 cyl that used more oil than gas. Needless to say, I did not get laid because of the car I was driving. I just didn’t get laid period.
Stoney, you should patent the parts and ideas you all came up with. At least then you can get a judge to grant you visitation rights so you can see your tools. Plus, they won’t be able to leave the country without your permission.
I got fucked once buying a used car with a cracked subframe, does that count?