So... many... jokes... *aneurysm*

Below you’ll find the highlights of the comments section from last week. If you see something you think should make the highlights next week, nominate it here via copy and pasting (the nomination post won’t show up on the main page, so bookmark it).

This week’s winner gets a brand new copy of Lost Boys: The Tribe on DVD, because I have better things to do with my life than spend a single second on a Corey.  Anyone named Corey. …And the winner is… Chodin.  He only narrowly beat out John Wayne in a Devo Hat, but I thought between these two gems he was deserving.

[From the JJ Abrams Earthquake Movie Thread]
chodin says  "…it will focus more on the relationships between people caught in the disaster"
Dialogue: "Deborah, if you weren’t so smashed to death under that fucking slab…I’d marry the shit out of you!"

[From the Brian Austin Green Wants to Play Riddler thread] chodin says, "I would love to be the Riddler, but then again, I’d just love to be anyone other than me" Brian Austin Green sobbed to MTV News.

See the honorable unmentionables after the jump.

[From the My Best Friend's Girl thread] John Wayne in a Devo Hat says:

Kate Hudson: Did you really think roses and poem would get you another chance?

Dane Cook: I’m here to get Goldie Hawn’s phone number because she looks younger than you.

Kate Hudson: You’re an annoying queer and you steal more jokes than the worthless beaner Mencia.

Dane Cook: Your cunt is probably so dry it’s like a chalk board. Can I write that 100 times with chalk? On your chalk board cunt?

Kate Hudson:Oh God I love you. Fuck me up the shitter, you annoying unfunny comedian.

You have to admit, not many people can utilize vulgarities to the effect that JWIADH can.  This was a nice one-two punch from Rotwangchung and Pauly Dangerously:  

[From the Indian Dude Stabs His Girlfriend thread] Rotwangchung says, Actually, it was this chick’s previous boyfriend that wanted her dead.  He just out-sourced it to Shelley.

Pauly Dangerously says, Maybe if she was fat as a cow, she might have been spared.

You racist dicks.  Meanwhile, Al challenged Michelle07‘s title as funniest FilmDrunkette:

[From the Watchmen Rape Scene thread] Al says, Well thank god it’s going to be "really brutal".  I’m always so disappointed by the tender intimacy depicted in garden-variety, everyday kinda rape.

Sometimes I read the comments and think, "Damn it, that was the joke I was searching for."  Thanks for the feelings of inadequacy, Al.  Guess I won’t have to look at my penis again today.

[Also from the Watchmen Rape Scene thread] Donkey Hodey says

*rereads article*

Oh, holy shit, you scared me.  At first, I thought that said ‘brutal rap scene"  I started having 8-Mile flashbacks.

And last but not least, here’s Michelle07‘s comment from the Star Trek Poster thread.  I have no idea what it means, but the Trekkies all swear it’s hilarious.  They also say Crocs are very comfortable.

Michelle07 says, There are FOUR actors.   

So there. you. go.  I’ll have a prize next week as well, so don’t start slacking off on me.