07.24.08 TIM BURTON CASTS SOME BITCH

This fucking cunt realizes she is in a Burton movie that will feature a Queen obsessed with decapitations, right?

Fuck, someome beat me to hitting Kate Blanchett with a truck.

Yeah, ummm . . . she looks like she’s already been through the standard Tim Burton movie makeup application process. What gives?

Wosikowska is how you spell porn music phonetically.

I’d like to use this chick like a periscope.

Holy shit, this chick could deep throat a rhinocerous.  Seriously though, I wouldn’t mind seeing her play with a Rabbit.

she’s kinda cute

In Treatment was awesome, this chick Washacockski was awesome. That bshe’s 18 now and has a mouth big enough to park a Volkwagon Van in, also awesome.

I’m not saying this chick has a long neck, but she can use queen-size comforter as a scarf.

I liked her better as the lead in the original Land Before Time.

My brother and I used to have a Wasikowska 50, when we were kids. That shit was fun.

"Wasikowska!" is what a Japanese magician says right before he reveals.

I’m not saying this chick has a big neck, but she’s never had a problem with blind spots while driving.

She’s also cast as the female alien in E.T. 2: Salvation.

That chicks head would look fucking amazing in my hunting room.

She’s from Australia, I wonder how many Crying Monkey Awards she has?

When I think of giraffes, I cannot help but think of this:

http://www.evolutionfairytale.com/giraffe3.htm

(essentially work safe)

I’m not saying this chick has a long neck, but she is fucking pale.

"…is apparently on In Treatment…"
Oh hey, isn’t that that one show that I’ve never fucking seen?

Did the crew have to take breaks to allow her time to bury her head for naps?

<== just saw Mia pop an apple into her mouth whole and spin it with her tongue.

I’m not saying this chick has a long neck, but Lisa Rinna could give her a hickey and it would look like a mosquito bite.

I bet the food she eats spoils before it hits her stomach.

Julia Roberts is going to get face-hole diameter envy.

They should cast Wilford Brimley and Jim Caviezel as the Walrus and the Carpenter.

Steven Tyler was quoted as saying, "That’s a huge fucking mouth! Waaahaaahaayaaaa!"

Pauly: "Hey Bitch, did you just get a hair cut?"

Mia: "No! I just had my fucking shoulders lowered."

Her boyfriend described oral as, tossing a sausage into a manhole.

It’s funny because I used to wake my girlfriend up by blasting Jefferson Airplane and then throwing a grapefruit at her head. Only replace "blasting Jefferson Airplane" with "crying really loud" and then "throwing a grapefruit at her head" with "begging for sex".

She’s the genetic result of coming from a long line of cattle rustlers.

She uses a box of Crest White Strips for one half of her teeth.

The top left half.

She can wear a turtleneck and you’ll still see clavicle.

neckropheliac.

You’d have to come on her four times to give her a proper pearl necklace.

She dresses like a barber pole every year for halloween.

Little known tidbit about Mia.

She’s the love child of Cynthia Nixon and Manute Bol. 

The problem with casting her for Alice in Wonderland is that it’s going to take an hour and a half to get through the ‘eat me, drink me scene’

I bet she has to drive a car with a sunroof and wear those boss aviator goggles.

"…presented in Disney Digital 3-D…"

Or as the children like to call it: "Scariest-Fucking-Memory-Of-My-Adolescent-Life-Vision".

"eat me, drink me" = 69?

Feed your head some fuckin’ grapefruits.

In the summer she lets underprivileged kids use her esophagus as a water slide.

True Story: I hit my bestfriend in the head with a golf ball after I tee’d off on my other friend’s rooftop. He was about 10 feet away and dropped like a bag of bricks.

She served two years in the Australian navy as a periscope.

True Story Pauly: that’s what happens to people when you hit them in the head with golf balls.

This girl would be kind of hot if it weren’t for her everything.

Tru dat, chodin.

I’ll never lie to you Pauly…

*Chodin leans in close; Dido starts to play in the background*

That’s a three dick gob alright. are you sure she’s not playing the Cheshire Cat? I may have to watch Fear and Loathing again for inspiration as "me and a few of the boys have got some work to do" this weekend.

This reminds me of a fun nature fact: did you know that the only bird with a penis is a swan?  In related news, I wouldn’t fuck her with a swan’s dick.