OH HEY LOOK, ANOTHER CULT
05.07.08
Everyone’s favorite wholesome-bots The Jonas Brothers will be getting their own 3-D concert film. Hooray, now your kids can be even farther removed from anything real!
The movie, to hit theaters in 2009, will feature footage from the group’s upcoming "Burning Up" concert tour, as well as a behind-the-scenes look at the lives of bandmates Kevin, Joe and Nick.
For instance, sometimes they play Sorry backstage, other times Uno. But one time, they played Chubby Bunny and Nick fit 13 marshmallows in his mouth LOL!
The tour will kick off in Toronto on July 4; in addition, the band can be seen this summer in the Disney Channel original movie "Camp Rock," premiering June 20. The trio has a Disney Channel series, "J.O.N.A.S.!," debuting in the fall, and its next album is scheduled for release in August. [Yahoo]
I’d let my kids watch a Cannibal Corpse video called Satan Gutrapes a Lab Puppy before the Jonas Brothers, but if you’re interested, I managed to dig up some concert footage after the jump.
MMM, drink up, taste and swallow it. Which one of you kids wants a Banana Smoothie? Don’t fight, daddy made enough for everybody.
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I really didn’t think it was possible to out-gay the last post.
What happened to teen idols? If these chudly fellows can make it soon Sexman will be a Tiger Beat cover boy.
The tour will kick off in Toronto on July 4
That’s awesome that they’ll be celebrating our nation’s independence in America’s hat.
Who the what the where the when the what the fuck?
Agreed Pauly.
How fucking American of these douchebaggots to celebrate the 4th in a fucking other fucking country!
Looking at the hair, I’m to assume the one on the right is the milkman’s kid?
JHC- he’s even seperated himself from his ugly brother by wearing a white tie.
Thanks Vince. I gotta go home with this shit on my mind?!
There better be titties over there.
This is my favorite ban…fuck i couldn’t even get it out. Who are these people? Are they in Hike School musical? What happened to Rescue Rangers and Duck Tales?
This shit sux.
Sux out loud.
I’d like to apologize to everyone for not sending in any tips for a couple days. And also for seeing one of the Austin Powers movies in the theater. I shouldn’t encourage Mike Myers and I apologize.
The one in the white tie is teh ghey
Robo what the hell, why did you see love guru?
I liked Mike Myers when he was Wayne Campbell. But that’s it
hey did any of you fuckers BTK michelle? where is she?
This fucking show sux sideways. The only thing that could save this from complete suckery is full frontal nudity. I vote for the pretty one. No the other pretty one. Man, those fuckin kids are kinda pretty, huh? What were we talking about?
Oh, fuck you guys! You cannot tell me that what I just said durst this mofo! Fuck you all!
Pauly, looks like Nick Jonas can be your new Bust It Baby.
Susie, I’d be his "personal" plumber and lay pipe ALL DAY.
I have nothing more to say.
I do, Sasquatch!!
This is no way to start the ‘No Poon Afternoon’.
I get a feeling that the security at these concerts will be there weed out ALL female groupies, not just the ones who aren’t skilled at playing ‘the gag factory’.
The Jonas Brothers take it in the no-no
I ain’t googling these fucks.
I ain’t fucking these googs.
Not that they wouldn’t be up for it.
Googs are whores.
Speaking of whores, The Mighty One is glad Sexman translated "cathouse" for Him!
I thought a "cathouse" is where the creepy old lady with 200+ cats live.
These kids have more sex than I do.
With each other
The middle one looks like a young Adrian Zmed. That makes me feel better.
My nine and seven year old daughters saw them in concert a couple of months ago. Now I have to listen to their CD every time I’m in the car with them.
Every night since the concert, I’ve prayed for three things: for the end of the war in Iraq; for the safety and well being of my children; and for the ghost of Cliff Burton to send the Jonas Brothers’ tour bus into a ravine.
Welp, I’m out. I gotta drink beer and raise hell at a ZZ Top concert tonight.
FUCK ALL Y’ALL
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*Chodin returns from the Jonas Brothers’ dressing room. Wipes sides of mouth*
What the fuck is everybody looking at?
Are you afraid of heights Chodin?
Because your zipper is.
Holy shit, the Simpsons episode with Lisa getting a restraining order against Bart is on and there’s a superb appearance by Gary Busey.
Chodin, I told you Jo-nas supposed to go in there!
The fucking best part of this post is that Lavince linked “CHRIS HANSEN” as a tag.
I see "CULT" but I read "CUNT".
Sometimes I question about if I had a clone, would it be gay or not to have sex with him? Luckily I don’t have a clone so I really never have to persue the issue much.
The Jonas Brothers on the other hand…
…INBREEDERS !!!!!
My favorite Jonas Bro’s song is "Pink Starfruit".
My favorite Jonas Brother is the dark haired, gay one who kisses like a fish.
My favorite Jonas brother is the one in the white tie ^. I was the one who gave it to him if you know what I mean. Catch my drift? See where I’m goin with that? I fucking came on his neck, how’s that?
My favorite Jonas Brother is the one who told some girl, “Sign your, your, your, your chest!? Haha, get out of town! My brother’s dick dispenses banana smoothie!”
My favorite Jonas Brother is the one who plays the meat drum.
My favorite Jonas Brother is the one who sleeps on a plastic mattress.
My favorite jonas Brother is the one who’s attached (sexually) to the other two.
I’d fuck these three and then rock them to sleep like bear cubs.
queers.
My favorite Jonas Brother is the one with the hair on his nut.
My favorite Jonas Brother is the one who I took to ’27 Dresses’.
My favorite post is the one where it’s just me talking about three boys…
*Chodin glances around for police and then slowly backs out of the kitchen.*
My favorite Jonas Brother is the one who still uses Oxy Pads. Clearasil is for bitches and chumps.
*SWAT team crashes through Chodin’s windows*
*funky bass riff plays*
My favorite Jonas Brother is the one whose going to develope a meth dependency.
who’s ? who’sser? Hoosier?
The Jonas Brothers remind me a lot of you, Grodin, because they’re young and look like they like it in the butt.
Wow, does anyone else feel as old as I do right now?
I DO, I DO!
Wanna hear something sad? I have these fuckers on my iPod. Cuz I am a good mom like that. But I refuse to let them play it when I am within earshot.
What worthless Disney/Nickelodeon piece of crap are these douchebags from? Are you really considered a celeb when you come from either of those stations? Or E!?
My favourite Jonas brother is the one who gets eaten by a whale.
The video looks like a commercial for NAMBLA.
Ok, Fek, you must account for your whereabouts:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/24510864/wid/11915829?GT1=40006
Erswi, wheres my wake up drugs?
Thank goodness Im in here alone, I dont have to put on clothes! Woooooooooooooooo
I think this thread may become my very own naked land.