Pictured at left is Mena Suvari in a simpler time, before a series of awful hairstyles and tattoos made her go insane.
The red band trailer for Stuck is below the jump. Based on a true story, Stuck stars Mena Suvari in cornrow braids (hale to the naw!) as a nurse who runs over a homeless bum played by actual homeless bum Stephen Rea. He’s stuck in her car’s windshield, and she decides it would be easier to leave him to die in her garage.
To tell you the truth, I think he already died on the inside when he saw a white girl with cornrows. – RoboPanda
[source: bloody-disgusting]
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What about her tits? Are her tits in it? I told you people, I have very high standards. I loved American Beauty.
Erswi, calm down.
Her tits aren’t in it, are they? I wouldn’t want to see them even if they were, would I? Thought so.
Mena Suvari looked just like one of my cousins in American Beauty. That’s not to say I didn’t jack it to her, I just felt less good about myself than usual. To make up for it, I sent my cousin an extra-special birthday present (lingerie and my cell-phone number).
I think that she is weird looking and her first movie was her only good movie and she has silly tattoos and that is it.
In other news, Erswi is a tit man
Calling somebody a tit man by virtue of their adoration of Mena Suvari’s tits is like calling somebody a long-leg man by virtue of Rhea Perlman’s legs.
There are other factors involved Donkey, I promise. But that was damn funny, sir
Nic Cage’s forehead thinks Mena Suvari’s forehead is "fuckin’ big".
I have a little bit of a problem with this being marketed as a semi comedy. Ugh
Good old Mena has a great tattoo between her tits. No joke. Its a stylized number 13, which is appparently the number of people who still think this tired old butch is cute.
- Sheikh al-Gore
PS- Yeah, I’d still bang her, but she wouldn’t like it…
i
missed you guyslove mena’s tits.Mena Suvari was easily the ugliest of the actresses in American Pie (what’s his nuts’ mom included). That said, I’d fuck Allison Hannigan sixteen ways from Sunday.
I am not a tit man based on Mena Suvari’s tits. I am a tit man based on my wife’s being 38 DDD before she even got preggo. I loves me some tits. That’s not to say I don’t like small ones though. I will suck on Mena’s if she would let me (or take a wrong turn down the back alley by my
houseshedBTK van).I think that works perfectly. A semi comedy is like a semi erection. At first, it starts out with so much promise, but never really delivers anything on that. By the time five minutes is passed, you’re angry that it hasn’t fully developed and you want it to just be fucking over with. Also, it may involve a denied request for somebody to get his money back.
J, she’s all yours broha. Personally, I’m a Shannon Elizabeth man.
When I run over homeless people I get the fucking job done the first time.
What’s her windshield made of? Rock candy?
ditto on the ladies of American pie JHC–Even the supposed ugly one was hotter than Mena (but i am
notone tolookgift tittiesin thewith my mouth)::looks around suspiciously::
First the Sheik shows up, now Bea. I’m dying, arent’ I? You can tell me, it’s ok. I’m ready.
Eib: I’m kinda with you there, I remember the news coverage of the actual story, and I prefer that my black comedies not be based quite so literally on reality.
I’d lay my small penis atop that giant fivehead of hers.
Stephen Rea is reaching for the cell phone so he can fire his agent.
You can’t tell because he is so small, but Reepicheep has li’l mouse rows!
Color me skeptical but I don’t think i’m going to go see this movie.
Unless there are boobs in it.
Dick Joke.
Her windshield is one of those fucking chinese finger traps!
I think if farmers planted crops in patterns the same way black people braid their cornrows, we’d have a lot more black farmers.
JHC says Mena Suvari was easily the ugliest of the actresses in American Pie (what’s his nuts’ mom included). That said, I’d fuck Allison Hannigan sixteen ways from Sunday.
Our tastes in women are disturbingly similar. Must be something in the communion wafers.
The Mighty Fek’lhr saw a white guy with rows at IHOP friday night.
…
Did He ever let that guy out of His trunk? BRB!
I remember this. Chick was a nurse and was fucked up on ex when she hit him.
Did He ever let that guy out of His
trunkwindshield? BRB!fixed
DOr sho gha! What a wuss! He was only in His trunk for a few days (bound and gagged…and slightly abused) and died!
Erswi, you bury Alyssa Milano yet? Can you throw this guy in with her?
Yeah Crap, and he died. And she never went and checked on him. I just happened to see a copy of Fangoria, or maybe I read the whole thing so what?, and he lives and gets some sort of Creepshow-like revenge.
Yo BeaDrag. Is this reunion week or something? If Hairy Nutsack posts. Or Franks and Beans. Or if Hustla stiks his head in… I may have some sort of funny reaction or something.
Cornrows are the urban mullet; there, I said it.
I pushed a bum over with my car one time. I should have just killed him. Then Kevin Heffernan could of had his first serious role as me in the movie.
::beep beep beep tooooooooooooooooone:: We interrupt your regularly scheduled programming with this breaking news.
It’s with great pain that I must inform the Filmdrunk community that chodin was involved in an accident this morning. Details are sketchy, but from what I’ve been able to gather, it involves a kitchen appliance, some sort of british baked good, and a fork. When further details become available, we’ll be sure to break in right away.
Now, back to easy listening afternoons, I’m JHC.
::Lord I see Daniel, must be the clouds in my eyes::
Got in Himmel! I hope they brought a wheelbarrow for the money they had to pay the person that did the cornrows on that Eastern-Euro waßermelon head! Shieße!
I know what happened; Bum mistook Mena’s fuzzy breach for his refrigerator box/duplex, and leapt at it thinking somone was trying to steal his cans.
No! Not chod! It’s his "boot week" too.
This movie is to dark comedies what cornrows are to white girls.
I know that was lame, I only posted it out of the furious contempt I have for all of you.
"Candlelight vigil" isn’t quite right for this crowd, what do you say we start a tire fire?
I can’t play the video right now….buuuuuuut I’m pretty sure that’s Bobert Downey Jr. in blackface right?
I will set up the slushie piss boot stand on the corner.
Of course, we can use the BTK van as the "courtesy rest area," at the Guyz in Unitards car wash.
Mmmm, slushy piss. That sounds good on this hot summer’s day. I just hope I don’t drink it too fast…..
new post
Slushie piss boots are this years Coldstone Icecream.
Every one of the Wayans brothers auditioned for the role of Rashid. Sean and Marln even auditioned for the white girl.
I call bullshit on this based simply in the fact that if black people are so damn scared of my cat when they walk into my house then they damn sure aren’t getting near a half dead white guy…not even to snatch his wallet out of his pocket.
Lon. Mar-Lon Chaney
While I’m thinking about it, and I don’t know if there will be anymore posts today, I’d like to say well done to RoboPanda. It can’t be easy to write posts here, what with all us assholes.
Hear hear! I’ll drink to that…but then again, I drink to most things…really, it’s no wonder I’m alone :)
Stuart Gordon is like that really smart asshole kid in the 4th grade. The guy creates something absolutely amazing (In this case Re-Animator, or a really kick ass macaroni art birthday card) and it seems like the skies the limit. Fast forward 20 years and it’s just sad reality: Living with his parents, working at a gas station, hitting the cop from V for Vendetta with a car, making white girls haircuts.
I’ve seen it a million times…so sad….