A TALE OF TWO POSTERS
03.13.08
Good tagline: The story of a man who teaches people how to kick other people in the face.
Bad tagline: A comedy about someone you know. Anyone who can explain what the hell that even means gets a gold star. And a punch to the groin.
Good Gimmick: A karate guy wearing sunglasses – you wouldn’t hit a guy with glasses, would you? LOL!
Bad Gimmick: Ripping off the shirt-matches-the-wallpaper gag from Garden State. Also, Jessica Alba’s in it. And Aaron Eckhart has the same stupid hair and manly chin he has in every movie. Leave me alone, man, I’m not gay! How many times do I have to tell myself?
In conclusion, Meet Bill is fucking fired.
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The only way this could be better is if Professor Hiro Beatdown from that video yesterday curb-stomped "Bill".
Does no one even try with these posters anymore? Where are the badly painted 80s posters? They never looked like the actors, but at least they were trying.
In conclusion, Hollywood is filled with lazy bastards
*waiting for someone to fix His post Bill—>Jessica Alba*
*waiting for someone to fix His post Bill—>Jessica Alba*
http://www.movieposter.com/poster/A70-713/Caddyshack.html
Now thats a poster. Come on guys
I can’t wait to see the previews for The Foot Fist Way. Will Ferrell is hilarious in thirty second increments.
If it was truly a Garden State ripoff it would say Meet Balls on his forehead. Cuz remember, guys? That scene where he had balls written on his forehead? That was so deliciously quirky. (opens itunes and pretends to be hip by listening to the Shins).
The only way this could be better is if Professor Hiro Beatdown from that video yesterday curb-stomped
"Bill".Klingon LlamaFek’lhrJessica Albafixed. do I win a prize or something?
Mphhoo-pphh…I know what the tagline means but a punch in the goin sounds horrible.
Jeffrey Goines was a fruitcake…unnhhh!!!
LOL! Looks like Fek has his own tale of two posters! ROFL!
"I thought I had a goin problem. My Doctor said I have a "growing" problem due to an enlarged prostate."
The Foot Fist Way is also a porno site I frequent.
Jessica Alba is stalking me. Bitch shows up everywhere I fucking go! WTF Jalba I said over means over. You wouldn’t put out, and the world turned.
How does Banks keep getting work? I feel like i’m taking crazy pills!
My address is 387 Foot Fist Way.
Is Alba playing Hillary or Monica?
I was at the Farmers Market in LA perusing the pomegranates and stone fruit and the bitch rolls up and starts asking me how to pick a good cumquat, but she was all like cuuuummmquat, which was so fucking lame I kicked her in the neck and took her butt cherry.
banks is a dirty whore shes had to suck some serious jewish cock ammounts to get to where she is today
‘Presented By’
WTF does that mean on movie posters? It’s like when you are at uni and there are 4 of you doing a huge peice of coursework that has to be presented at the end of term. And you never see one member of the group all fucking SEMESTER. So the other 3 of you do ALL the fucking work yourselves. And then on the day of the presentation they turn up, say a couple of witty things and then get a passing grade that EVERYONE ELSE WORKED FOR!!!!!!!!!!!!
*bitter*
I really wish that there was Jalba and a sickly kitten in a burning building, but I could only save one. If my life was full of such simple decisions I could jack off more.
Bex- She’s into Kosher meat? I should have her Meet Bill (what I named my cock).
I heard when two actresses under contract with Satan end up in the same film a gateway to hell opens.
Scanning these comments I got Will, Hillary, Banks, Jeffrey…my life got flipped turned upside down.
Not bad, Katie!
do I win a prize or something?
No.
*Pauly sending letter from prison to cohorts on the outside to put a hit on Bill*
You know what’s scary as shit? When you’re pissing in the toilet and the toilet seat is raised at a ‘Heil Hitler’ angle, so the whole time you’re pissing you’re worried that the lid is going to fall and snap your dick off.
That is fear.
Aaron Eckhart always looks like he suffers from
anus prolapseacid reflux.That’s why I sit when I piss, Chod.
I mean……
GRRRRR…..TAKING A PICTURE OF MY TERDS AND SENDING THEM TO FRIENDS!!!!
JHC‘s avi make me want to place my johnson someplace warm and snug. Is that teh ghey creeping in?
Poster One: A movie that will win a MTV Movie Award.
Poster Two: A movie that might be nominated for a Juno Award.
Advantage: America.
Chodin – I know what you mean. I can’t understand why Kohler’s line of "Surprise Circumcision" toilet seats are so popular.
I really liked Aaron Eckhart as the Punisher.
JHC- It’s not acid reflux. He’s still suffering from that time he got jacked by those guys in the van and they stuck nicotine patches all over him.
I really liked
Aaron EckhartDolph Lundgren as the PunisherFIXED!
I’m a huge Dolph Lundgren fan. i wasn’t even mad when Drago killed Apollo.
I really liked
Aaron EckhartDolph Lundgren asthe Punisher when it was a comic book.FIXED!
FIXXEDENTED AND FORGOTTEN!
If he dies he dies.
Some guy running for DA looks just like Aaron Eckhart. Coincidence?
http://www.ibelieveinharveydent.com/
I really liked
Aaron EckhartDolph LundgrenRutger Hauer as the PunisherFIXED! X10
Harvey Dent reminds me of Thomas Jane.
apollo had it comin’.
he was all, ‘i’m bad and you’re too…..BLONDE!’
and stuff. people that act like dicks deserve to be
beaten mercilessly to a pulp in a public forum of
thier own choosing and preferably by someone they
immensely dislike.
I thought Ivan Drago bit off Apollo’s hand.
son…how many times do i have to tell you…
that’s not his ‘hand’…
Mpph-oopoooo…I’m glad the Tom Jane – Aaron Eckhart connection was mentioned. I was watching No Reservations (with the wife!) and was like, "Punisher stop making that soufflé and get back to exploding Travolta."
Long story short, I thought the rom-com would lead to me exploding into the wife’s travolta, but she hated it too. No Reservations = Mo’ Masturbations.
I wish he would have fought Adrian.
Bitch.
son…how many times do i have to tell you…
that’s not his ‘hand’…
So what am I shaking in the shower then, Dad?
Penis. You’re shaking penis.