02.29.08 WHO’S READY TO HATE LIFE!
If there are any terrorists reading this, I believe I have acquired a target for you to attack. The locations is the set of Beer for My Horses, a movie which Toby Keith is set to write, produce, and star. It is imperative that you not leave any survivors.
The title comes from Keith’s hit single, also features Rodney Carrington (also co-writer), Ted Nugent, Willie Nelson [we’ll need to give him advance warning before the attack], Claire Forlani, Barry Corbin and Tom Skerritt.
Keith and Carrington play small-town deputies who embark on a wacky road trip to rescue their girlfriends from comically evil drug lords. [Ed note: shouldn’t it be ‘sexy girlfriends’? Everything else has adjectives.]
Thankfully no distributor is on board yet. Just imagining who might want to watch such a movie was more depressing than ten paternity episodes of Maury and watching a puppy freeze to death.
Also: I don’t believe there’s ever been a worthwhile human being named ‘Toby’.
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/05/princeofpersia-jakegyl2-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2009/04/g-force-juarez-150x150.jpg)
There are 84 comments about:
WHO’S READY TO HATE LIFE!
Wait, drug lords are holding their girlfriends captive and John Cena ISN’T in it????
Oh my god, it’s ‘The Gimp’ from Pulp Fiction.
Toby? Toby? Toby Wong?
Tobe Hooper is cool. But he didnt use the emasculating Y.
Wait, so Toby Keith is doing Rock of Love now? Or is that Bret Michaels without the wig? I am so confused
"I’ll put a boot up yur ass, It’s dee amican way!"
Put me in a room alone with clown for three minutes, please. Just make sure Ted "gun-holster on his guitar" Nugent isn’t there.
Lance, please transplant the Nascar talk to this, more appropriate thread. Tnx
sunupu-clown issue already done for the day
What the fuck? Were John Schneider and Tom Wopat filming Dukes of Hazzard 3- The Wreckonin’?
My first thread Durst!
I’m gonna go beat off in celebration.
You wouldve beaten off anyway JHC, dont lie
What in the Wide World of Sports is a Toby Keith? I’ve heard of a Toby Jug. They’re very popular at antique fairs.
Toby from the Office is cool.
Banner pic-What Harry Knowles believes he sees when he looks in the mirror.
GRRR…TY D BOL MAN HAS A WOOKIE WEAVE!!!!
Banner pic-What Perez Hilton wishes he saw when he showered at the Y (on every second Tuesday of the month).
Kunta Kinte’s slave name was Toby.
Banner pic-actually Lance.
Oh Eib, you know me too well.
Toby jugs: http://tinyurl.com/2dra8b
I hear Sean Puff Daddy Combs(?) has an extensive collection and can often be seen at car boot sales on the lookout for bargains. Sold him some Carmen Rollers and a Shakin’ Stevens LP once. Vinyl. Mint condition.
There couldnt be more zippers in that picture… or spelling errors in this article.
Goddammit Charlie! I thought Toby jugs was some porno chick’s name. I am really thirsty for a beer now…
"car boot sale" I love that quant English speek. In USandA we call that "possession of stolen property."
Comically evil drug lords? That sounds too wacky! Most of the time, drug lords are consummate professionals with a level of evil one might describe as dramatic. But comically? That is too much! ROFL! My stars!
Undoubtedly someone will say "Say ‘ello to my leetle friend," and I hope it’s Willie and then he rides in on a shetland pony smoking a roach.
JHC- Ditto
This aint my first rodeo.
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