In case you forgot, someone’s still making another Street Fighter movie (they already made one starring Jean Claude Van Damme back in 1994 – I prefer the Korean version above).
The actors they tricked into it are Kristin Kreuk (Lana in Smallville), Michael Clarke Duncan (the voice of Quizno’s), Chris Klein (the guy with the big forehead from Election), and a couple people I’ve never heard of including a one-named guy from the Black Eyed Peas. Sources say it wasn’t hard because actors are stupid. Duncan will play boxer Balrog, Kreuk is Chun Li, Klein plays Guile’s dead buddy Nash.
Andrzej Bartkowiak ("Romeo Must Die," "Exit Wounds") is directing from a script penned by "Voltron" scribe Justin Marks. Hong Kong fight choreographer Dion Lam ("The Matrix") is handling the extreme fight sequences. [Variety]
Handling the non-extreme fight sequences? You guessed it, Frank Stallone. Also, I don’t remember any Voltron movie so I’m pretty sure they just made that up.
Hyde Park and Capcom had originally wanted to release the pic to coincide with the 20th anniversary of the "Street Fighter" franchise; the first game bowed in arcades in 1987.
In related news, holy shit I feel old.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2011/12/battleshipkitsch_a-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2011/08/Johnny-depp-lone-ranger-tonto1-150x150.jpg)
Who cares? Big deal? Amazing!
I’m sure there was an actual script out in the world of words that could have used the funding money that this nostalgia-atrocity got to make this turd of a film. STOP. MAKING. MOVIES. FROM. GAMES. What’s next Snakes and Ladders: the Sequel?
The Mighty Fek’lhr wonders if Raul Julia will be reprising his role as M. Bison?
…
What?
DOR SHO GHA!
Now that strike is over, I can get back to my screen adaptation of Galaga.
I sort of read that, laughed at ‘tricked into it’, saw the picture of the chick and looked at that.
It seems the only thing I like to do on the interweb is look at pictures of chicks. God I love doing that. Are there any sites just dedicated to pictures of chicks to look at?
catch-Have you tried "barebacksoldiers.com"?
Power Rangers is the plain label Beer of Voltron.
(Circles Michael Clarke Duncan in this month’s celebrity death pool.)
What do you think Chris Klein misses more — Katie Holmes or his career?
Power Rangers is the suck version of terrible shit.
Awesome!!
Wait.
Fuck.
Street Fighter is the GoBots of Mortal Kombat.
Street Fighter is the cerebral palsy of birth defects. Wait. What?
Kreuk is Chun Li
So the white girl is going to ‘yellow up’ and play an Asian? I’m hoping she commits fully to this roll with a shockingly racist accent.
“Me so solly! Me sucky sucky 5 dolla! Me love you long time GI!”
She’s half Asian, bryce. And Canadian.
I used ‘roll’ in a hipster post-modern Britney way, not because I’m stupid.
According to imdb.com she has a purple belt in karate. So you better suckerpunch her in the throat if you feel threatened.
She prolly just says that to be cool… I’m half Asian and Canadian too!
*lets go of the corners of his eyes, removes fake buck teeth*
I nearly printed my essay with the name Pervy Bysshe Shelley. Wow. That would have been supremo dumb.
But funny Agb
I’m half Aslan and Klingon.
HOLD THE MOTHERFUCKING PHONE.
did we just glance over the phrase "Voltron scribe" in this story? ahem, lance? post please?
Van Dammit!
Voltron Scribe also wrote a movie called "The Stranger" starring Steve Guttenberg. Synopsis: After the loss of a husband and father, a mother and son reside on an abandoned airfield in an effort to keep his memory alive. A mysterious stranger arrives bringing life and the magic of hope.
And a film called Unbroken about sexual assualt, starring Rachel Bilson. I guess the unbroken is a ironically about her hymen.
Hymen? isn’t that another one of those Jerry Lewis words like Heigl?
did we just glance over the phrase "Voltron scribe" in this story? ahem, lance? post please?
I thought I addressed that with, "Also, I don’t remember any Voltron movie so I’m pretty sure they just made that up."
There is a Voltron movie scheduled to be released in 2010. It’s like me bragging about my post-graduate brilliance while riding my tricycle and using those slap-bracelets that suddenly disappeared so now I think they were made of Freon and Asbestos.
R.I.P Raul Julia
BTK Kristin Kreuk
Fuck that, last time I ate Quizno’s, Heather Ledger died.
…I thought Reese Witherspoon was the guy with the big forehead from Election?
You know that they didn’t name the show smallville because of Superman, right?
I WILL see this just for the chance to FAP to Kreuk in a Chun Li outfit
They couldn’t find ONE brotha in all of Korea to play Balrog? The least they could have done is sprung for some blackface.
There is only one good movie that’s made from a video game and that game is King of Kong. Ok, it’s a documentary but still.
What they should do is a movie that’s really made from Lode Runner. You know where that guy bounces around looking for golden shit and everybody tries to catch him… Oh, there actually IS a fourth Indiana Jones movie? Nevermind.
That movie is King of Kong… I really need to get BTK’d