NEW ‘IRON MAN’ POSTER
02.25.08
From the Wondercon convention in San Francisco, this is the newest poster for Iron Man, directed by Jon Favreau and starring Robert Downey Jr., Terrence Howard, and Gwyneth Paltrow.
It features the Iron Man helmet in three different incarnations. I’m hoping Paltrow has one of these on for the duration of the movie.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/monsieur_lazhar__ver2_C-Tates-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/Julia-Roberts-and-Armie-Hammer-in-Mirror-Mirror-2011-Movie-Image-600x354-150x150.jpg)
Clunker (original suit) > all others (except maybe War Machine…)
Did you guys ever read that "What If?" comic where Punisher was Iron Man on the Avengers? BAM! Basically imagine War Machine with a Punisher skull
and pink tutu.I admit it, I’ve got a nerd boner.
Now, I just have to dispose of the nerd.
Hey, Fek, how come Klingons didnt have ridges in the original Star Trek?
Channeling Worf: It was a dark time for the empire. We do not speak of it.
I actually have a semi about this movie. I can only imagine the fanboy reaction to this poster though.
OMG!!!! That’s not what the Mark III suit looked like. It’s the wrong color and it should have more of a glossy finish, not matte. God, who’s directing this?
What if Ironman has to take a shit in a public restroom? Does he have to carry a toolbox for such a contingency? Or is he assumed to just crap in the suit?
Hey, Fek, how come Klingons didnt have ridges in the original Star Trek?
Because french onion chip dip hadn’t been invented yet?
how come Klingons didnt have ridges in the original Star Trek?
*incoming transmisison*
Actually, they did, but recording equipment 30-40 years ago was so poor that you couldn’t see them. And most tv’s were black and white.
The Waffle Has Spoken!
*end transmisison*
<====== He is all about shoulder-mounted guns!
<==== All about eating its own poop.
<======= All about balloon animals.
<======= All about Eve
<========= All about his "Zug Durst" joke from the last thread. I’m still laughing, fuckers.
Someone with Photoshop to add Jesus to the left of that poster with the caption "MARK 0".
*An excerpt from the negotiations for this film*
Robert Downey Jr: “Look bros, I’ll play this dude, but he has to have a special attachment that fires cocaine- deal?”
Zog. Fuck.
*Chodin takes the gag ball out of his mouth*
fuck it.
joke won’t work now.
OH really?
Mark Twain?
Mark Spitz?
Mark Summers?
Marky Mark?
Mark your calendars!
I have fucking lost it.
MARK IT ZERO!!!!
catched great expectations on cable this weekend, gwynneth actually looked good in that movie.
fek i’ll save you the trouble:
BONG!!!
Oh Jhc I love you.
I finally watched Crank this weekend on cable. Fucking Awesome.
Someone with Photoshop to add Jesus to the left of that poster with the caption "MARK 0".
Someone with Photoshop to add a polo game to the left of that poster with the caption "MARC O".
So Iron Man is Mark. If it’s Mark Knoefler then his career must be in Dire Straights.
I pun in your face!
I finally watched Crank this weekend on cable. Fucking Awesome.
Didn’t we watch that together?
I think we may have Luch
This reminds me of a kid named Johnny that went to middle school with me. He was in my art elective class. Johnny was a little slow. So one day in class he has his hand down his sweats and he’s going to fucking town. He’s smiling the entire time just looking around. Everyone starts noticing and the teacher says "just ignore him until he’s finished". Not even a minute later Johnny just got up, and walked out and I said "I guess he’s finished". He left his lunchbox on top of his desk. It was an old Iron Man lunchbox.
I too watched Crank. Laughed my ass off.
My Iron Man suit would have a flame throwing crotch weapon called the Fucking Gonorhea Again device which would be activated by clapping my hands.
I wish I had gone to school where you did Pauly. My teacher always told me that if there wasn’t enough to share with the class, that I couldn’t do it. Needless to say, when I asked the girl next to me if she’d like a pull, I got kicked out of class.
My girlfriend just got a puppy, so I took a shit on the carpet and left while she went in the bathroom. I told her dogs are filthy animals. Now she’ll learn.
I finally watched Crank
thisall weekend oncableCrank. Fucking Awesome.Signed, Chodin’s roommate.
Seriously though if you ever have a friend with a Great Dane that is an invite to poo on their floor. Great Dane’s take human size poopies.
JHC: It’s like you live there too.
*Jon Favreau’s ‘Iron Man’ *
Iron Man: “Fuck it…I wear a robot suit. I just don’t think she’s that into me. *sniffle*…no, no, you know what!? I can fire fucking bullets from my tits! FUCK IT! I’M MONEY!!!!!!!!”
fek i’ll save you the trouble:
BONG!!!
Hmm…let’s see…that would be:
BONG!!! with three exclamation points: If The Mighty
Fek’lhrBex’lhr sees you in line for this movie, He will offer to kill you to spare your retinas and cerebrum the agony.I’m glad that Iron Man decided to tone down the lights in his eyes.
He decided upon this modification when he realized that he couldn’t see shit.
I’m gonna take Jack-off Johnny to see this movie, but I going to make sure we each get our own popcorn.
Pauly, when he tries to convince you to take a swig from his thermos: DO IT!!!!
…unless you’re worried that you’ll like it too much. fag.
BONG!!! with three exclamation points: If The Mighty
Fek’lhrBex’lhr sees you in line for this movie, He willoffertokillkeel you mengtofor spare changeyour retinas and cerebrum the agony.and steal your car!PRE-EMPTIVE FIX!
So it’s like the "Wink rule" in Circle Jerk Club, Chodin?
…(no pun intended) I’m glad we’re seeing eye to eye on this one Gacy.
*Chodin winks*
*incoming transmisison*
Part of The Mighty Fek’lhr feels like we should be condemning the Oscars for snubbing Renfro, but then He realized:
*end transmission*
Ok, seriously. Is Brendon just raiding this site?
I knew a greasy yellow slope of an iron man down at the chinese laudry. Fucker kept creasing my blue jeans.
Jacktion! – we’ll never know, but my money says that Lance has been stealing everything from Brendon for the past year. My money also says that the Doctress is the real genius behind filmdrunk.
*Pauly makes fake gun with his hand and winks back at Chodin. then adds a head nod and mouths the words ‘Fuck yeah’*
Hmmm, hey guys, shitting blood is a bad sign right?
they also snubbed roy schneider, he wasn’t on the list! HE WASN’T ON THE LIST!!!!
Not if you ate a person, Crap.
* Chodin flips a lit cigarette into his mouth, gives Pauly’s dick the double-handguns, winks and mouths the words ‘Guantanamo bay was tight!’ *
they also snubbed roy schneider, he wasn’t on the list! HE WASN’T ON THE LIST!!!!
AHHH – this is who I was thinking of this morning. Thank you.
Whew, that takes a load of the old thinkin dome. Tx, PD.
Well, Roy just died, he will be in next year
Is Roy Schneider the guy from One Day At A Time?
Seriously though, Scheider was in what could be argued as one of the most recognizable movies worldwide, and can’t get no love, yet an assclown dopefiend that kills himself gets the cleanup spot on the tribute? They honestly should be ashamed of themselves.
True story time: yesterday I bought ‘Cloverfield’ from a street vendor, but also got the case to ‘The Host’ – THANK YOU MEXICANS!!!
they also snubbed roy schneider
Well, I was actually thinking of Roy Scheider. Roy Schneider (Rob’s dad) killed himself after the premier of Deuce Bigelow, European Gigalo. Funny how the other ones didn’t bother him…
haha, oh man- you fukcing iddiots misspellled that shit! haha, you fukincg aswholes!
Your welcome Crap and your welcome Chod.
Geez JHC, you really think the whole world would recognize him from Blue Thunder?
Roy once said, Mogwump jizzum in a movie.
I pointed out the Renfro thing, only because he fucked up his tragic death too. Ledger eclipsed it 5 days later. Sorry, Renfro, you lost.
i’m sorry you gays…but here’s a link for all your mothers.
http://www.salsasnack.com
I was actually thinking about the miniseries premier of SeaQuest DSV.
If the next post over there is about Iron Man, you fuckers had better get right with God, cuz something is going on that doesn’t smell fresh.
CotW will be up over there before it’s up here.
You’d think that a guy who was just stealing posts from elsewhere would be able to put more than 5 or 6 up a day.
Piñata
Yea, tilde motherfuckers!
I referred them over there to CNN.
Stealing posts takes time and effort. I have neither, but I still steal posts.
I think Renfro got snubbed because his "Fuck All Y’all" tattoo infact did offend "All Y’all".
Stealing posts takes time and effort. I have neither, but I still steal posts.
So when did WWTDD become a Mexican?
I refuse to acknowledge y’all as a word anymore. Texas will do that to you
<<<<<<I am a much cooler Klingon than Fek. Sorry dude, its true
Maybe it’s because Brad Renfro… IS STILL ALIVE!!!
<==== He begs to differ! Every pussy on teh interwebs just got wet!
I am a much cooler Klingon than Fek. Sorry dude, its true
Y’all trippin’
Full size sexiness here:
http://www.royalchessmen.com/photos/trek/Klingon.jpg
<======== Is all about the new James Madison Presidential $1 coins
Hey I’d like to thank Marc Summers for my one and only CoTW nomination this week. Thanks big guy. You know who you are.
Sorry, that post from Nominus was incredibly "late", but I just got back from lunch so fuck off.
And I am a much cooler robotic dog/monkey/pet/sex toy than… uh… :(
After what James Madison did to the Native Americans he should only be celebrated by neo-nazis as a genocidal shitfucking zelot and be vilified in all historical texts.
Asshole.
I think Brendon knows we’re onto him, his latest post is a video of some guy named Eduardo getting his leg broken in a soccer game.
Soccer is for pussies that can’t play real football.
* let the international bitch-fest begin *
Actually Crappy, they prefer to be called "Injuns" now. And you’re correct. I will say that his wife makes awesome snack cakes. Zingers are my favorites.
+1 to Crappy for rant
+1 to Erswi for sticking up for REAL football
+1 to Stinky for dissing Brend0n
+1 to JHC for Dolly Madison reference
-1,000,000,000,000,000 to Eib for challenging His Klingon heritage!
I prefer dirty red heathens, but its fallen out of vogue and I always try to keep concurent with the fresh hpster lingo, dig?
Soccer is for girls.
Foreign girls.
I think they had to scrap the Mark 2 suit because they made it with nipples.
Ok, soccer may be for girls, but I would still fuck David Beckham. As long as he said nothing, that guy is dumb
Little foreign girls.
Soccer is for
girlsguys who have no athletic talent other than runningFAGS.BONG???
I totally just realized that Lance is recycling material!!
http://filmdrunk.com/post.phtml?pk=725
Ok, Fek, does this make up for it? Please give me back my points. i have had no love today:(
Too bad for you. David Beckham only likes robots.
this is true Heather. Maybe if I put some softballs in my shirt and promised not to smile?
*incoming transmission*
Bah! D0 you think The Mighty Fek’lhr, Feared Master of the Klingon Underworld, could be tempted by such a simple ruse?
+1,000,000,000,000,000,000 points to Eib for tits
*end transmission*
+1 to Fek for STILL sticking with the *incoming transmission thing
Yes. Except make the softballs golf balls.
Erswi, where is my love today? Have I displeased you somehow?
Oh, yeah, I was a guy for half the day.
Mark I = White guy’s Iron Man suit (shoddy craftsmanship, slow)
Mark II = Black guy’s Iron Man suit (blingin’ yo)
Mark III = Oriental guy’s Iron Man suit (two tone paint and huge muffler where asshole would be)
*a sharp spike in neutron radiation is detected, then suddenly! GRETHOR APPEARS!*
QAPLAH, human baktags! The Mighty Fek’lhr must say, He has no idea who this Heather Crapbag is, but she is dead on about fucking Posh!
*Grethor goes blurry around the edges and disappears*
Oh, yeah, I was a guy for half the day.
Me too.
*J gets a coded message on the universal translator {two cans and a length of string})*
Reming Him to nom that about the suits!
Eib, so long as I’m breathing there’s always love for you. It’s not your fault it’s my fucking job, wanting me to work and like, do stuff and like, be productive. Fuck that. I gotsa have time in the day for my Drunkards and Drunkettes. you especially.
addendum to Mark III for my Midwest Muchacho Nominus (with stickers)
I like that she(?) has crap in her name. Like we’re related. I may go piss on the grave of Crapbasket and see what he thinks about this.
*deep in space, loud Klingon cursing is heard*
…i couldn’t give a fuck…
Craptastic, did you just imply that I look like a dude? We can’t be related. No one in my family would be that stupid.
*Chodin wakes up from under his desk, crawls up and begins to filmdrunk again*
…hey, maybe we’re done talking about soccer, but um, if it helps at all: i play soccer, have so for 18 years.
f.y.i. – Chodin playing soccer means it’s either A) really fucking manly or B) only for kids who fuck really manly dudes.
Eib, I figured out what the problem was. With my drunking needing to be on the down low, I didn’t even realize you were on today until I saw the funbags avatar. I’ve been looking for Harley Quinn. I keep my browser window super small in a corner of the screen to avoid the Vegas Hustla syndrome. Thus I tend to work offa avatars instead of user names. When you fuckers switch up all the time it makes it difficult for me. Also, this is far too lengthy a reply to that question and only getting longer as I explain its lengthiness . . .
MARK IV = retiree Iron Man suit, only goes 38 mph and the left blinker is always on
I watched a horse be put down once.
It made me cry.
I switch my avi more than I switch my fifi filter.
No crap the younger, my (?) implied that there is a real possibility that you could be a 43 year old fat albino pederast who lurks in his mom’s basement but who uses chick avis on film blogs when commenting whilst jacking it to Hanna Montana videos.
But I could be wrong.
I watched a horse fuck a dude to death once.
It made me cry…tears of goddamn joy.
That dude was the horse I was talking about.
That horse was my dad.
Mmmm, Hannah Montana. Excuse me while I grab some Jergens.
CotW forshak-hut dwellers!!!
That’s the spirit! Hey Fek, how many pedophile/masturbation comments warrant inclusion on the DH blog for Filmdrunking? We may have another keeper.
yellow snow eater.
WHA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks to the Nebraska-Blasta JHC for the shout out. Seriously, if no one acknowledged that I was somehow posting kind of, I would probably pull a quarter-durst with a half-cobain. Too soon?
*Fek’lhr tosses Craptastic into a Johnny Cab*
Could you please rephrase the question?
Heather Crapbag isn’t her real name.
It’s Leanne.
Well, close. My middle name starts with an L; however, my first name is still Heather. The Crapbag part is on my to do list. Along with skydiving and Megan Fox.
Heather Crapbag isn’t her real name.
It’s
Leanne. MARLENE!FIXED!
<jumps out of Jonny Cab after stealing drivers cool hat>
Witness and despair! The Ninjew!
I was talking about heather crapbag. A newcomer sure but already has discussed rimjobs, inferred that I am stupid, and embraced pedophilia and masturbation. A certain candidate for inclusion in The Mighty Ones blog list of Filmdrunking Femmes.
If Heather Crapbag really is a girl…I’d just like to let her know that she will never be financially equal to myself in the workplace.
*incoming transmission*
Well, she says her first name is Heather. That either makes her a girl, a tranny, or a sexually confused boy/fag. He supposes He can update the list for her…it…whatever…
*end transmisison*
God that was funny Chod.
I’m assuming Leanne and Marlene are two eccentrically droll site whores with whom you’re mistaking me. I can go ahead and tell you I just stumbled across this site at work while judging celebrities on wwtdd.com.
And Chodin, I’m sure I passed your salary seven blowjobs ago. Thanks.
<scratches head wondering what manner of action a crapbag could be, decides it is somthing similar to 2 girls 1 cup but with a ziplock bag>
List?
The list of female Filmdrunkards (about 1/3-1/2 way down).
BTW, you fucking rock. Stay here.
http://dirtyhairy.blogspot.com/2008/01/filmdrunking-by-mighty-feklhr.html
Probably helped if i provided the link, no?
Strange, I have checked off skydiving, and Megan is on my BTK list. This heather is like a vaginal analog of me.
Heather sounds like a fat girl name, but I’m willing to let you sit on my face so I can guess your weight.
Wait…you only had to give seven blowjobs?!?!?
Fucking-A,
Is it just me or is vaginal analog a good legal term for a fifi?
The use of a vaginal analog in a public place shall be considered a lewd act and shall be punished as such.
I have nothing to offer but BOOSH!
The list is earned in more than a day Oh Mighty one. I respectfully question the inclusion of a wwtdd noob.
No offense, HC
*Chodin rubs his soar jaw*
The blond chick in the Quarterlife ads is giving me the "fuck me" eyes. Wait, no. Those are the "get the fuck away from me before I drop kick your nuts into next week" eyes. I get those mixed up quite often.
…yeah, that’s right “soar”…cause my jaw is so high up in- ahhh, forget it. Fuck you.
Could I consider my fist a vaginal analog?
I worked really hard to be on that list!
Eib, she has a sponsor, and she dissed chodey. By all accounts He should remove all of you from the list until YOU have sponsors!
I’m not falling for it: Heather, I hope filmdrunk gives you HPV.
Oh, did anyone explain Marlene to her?
He is not sure about Leanne? Jack?
Oh, no one will sponsor me, even though I am a charter member of the CKT? That doesnt count?
And why am I getting so upset about this? I dont know
I have a sponsor! I needed one to get into Pedopheliacs Anonymous.
Now I know all the good places to get ass!
I dumped a gram of meth into my sponsor’s diet soda one night. Take that to your 13 years sober bullshit you elitist fuck.
I like this sponsorship idea.
I sponsored a girl to enter my gang once.
Just because she was my mom, didnt mean she had a special pass to get past the "beating".
Leanne is a girl I know who looks kinda like Heather’s avatar.
Poof! You’re sponsored. Now, quitcherbitchin.
I’ll sponsor anyone for some rock, or blow or a blow.
LUCH- I thought your mom was "sexed" into the gang?
You know why I care? I broke my coffee pot and had to go buy one today, and have only just had any caffeine. Please do not be offended, I think I need a coffee IV.
I thought your mom was "sexed" into the gang?
In, out, then back in again.
BOOSH!
You’d suck off a dude for a sponsorship?
Um, NO……yea…..I did my mom.
Sure Crap, how do you think I got my husband to marry me?
I’m my own sponsor.
Cause I can blow myself.
Eib, I will SPONSOR THE SHIT OUTTA YOU BABY! WOOHOO! LUCHA LIBRE!
GRRRR…..SPONSORSHIP!
Me too.
Who is my sponsor?
And thanks for the support, Chodin. I hope filmdrunk gives you a reason not to kill yourself.
Ha. Just kidding. Okay, I’m leaving for the day. And going straight home to write about these events in my diary. Bye!
Side note: Saying that I’m leaving obviously means I will stay around to see the answer to my question in correlation with Chodin’s lame response number three.
Chodin’s just upset because he actually has HPV.
He thought the vaccine was "unnessessary". (Extra sss for list effect)
list = lisp
I’d sponsor you, Heather, but I’m too busy juggling assorted accounts in here to even comment as "myself" anymore.
Plus, I’m not important enough to be a sponsor. In fact, I probably need one.
Well, Craptastic did give the original shout out for you to be added, so He considered him your sponsor by that.
I have a sponsorship deal with Nike. I pay them $230 and they let me wear the new Jordans. It’s win win!
chodin would never kill himself.
He enoys seeing Val Kilmer at work too much to kill himself.
No, no. They have to blow me. Unless they are on million airefriends.com. Then all bets are off…..
Good night you magnificent bastards and broads.
I called 411 yesterday and spoke with a lisp. They had a very hard time finding my listing for "Steve’s Super Sub-Sandwichs". Proabaly cause it doesn’t exist. I TOTALLY drank that operator’s milk shake.
chodin’s really upset because his boss keeps cockblocking him and Iceman.
*incoming transmission*
DOr sho gha! What is with all of the fallopian envy today???
Don’t worry Al, Eib, Lalagb, Chino, BK, Koru, Butters, we (the guys) all love you just as much as we always did!
It’s just that something newer, younger, and more attractive came by and i…mfffkkffflllrrr!!!!!
*transmission ended by good taste*
Fuck JHC, that was some uncanny mental linking type shit there.
Thanks Fek.
I mean Jacktion!
Al, while I’m "sponsoring" Eib with one hand, I can "sponsor" you with the other.
Sorry I taunted Him today with the klingon. I was just watching Star Trek last night, and couldnt help myself
*Chodin cracks knuckles; pops dick*
Heather, look bro – all I’m saying is that it takes more than a “cummy” avatar to get a prison tattoo around here. Try to earn your keep: make some sandwiches, wash Fek’s shitty diapers, deep throat to the balls and then get your nose pinched close- you know, things that every girl should master.
Eib, you say "watching Star Trek last night" like it was an isolated incident. Everyone here watches Star Trek at least 4 hours every night, just like me!
…meant…
I had to kill a man to get
an erectionon board here at Filmdrunk. That’s why I have a teardrop tat under my eye.Ok, I admit it is not an isolated incident. cho, I dont make you sandwiches!
Eibs = remember when you had me pinned under the couch with that little boy???? That kind of sandwich.
I would, however, make Erswi a nice crawfish po boy or muffaletta, if he asked
A muffaletta sounds like slang for rimjob.
I hear chod toasts a mean muffin. Sounds like amrriage material.
Durst Amrriage
I eat your sandwich!
It’s like Popeye always said:
"I amrriage what I amrriage"
GET ME A WHOPPER! > I drink your milkshake
Dick Amrriage = a famous politicial hack
I toast english muffins, like Dahmer used to cut off heads.
Really good.
Oh, well, you can toast my muffin Cho.
Dahmer decapitated like a fag.
I toast your muffin!
I decapitate your fag!
I BTK both you two, because FUCK YA’LL!!!
And Mike!
*The ghost of Brad Renfro leaves and Chodin regains feeling in his legs*
FUCK MIKE!!!!
I fuck your Mike!
please do not fuck my Mike.
Done with that.
Sorry I’m late for the 1st FilmDrunks Anonymous meeting. Let’s kick this thing off. I’ve been Eib’s official sponsor for some time now so everyone else STFU! Secondly, I’ve never had a muffeleta with crawfish but if it’s slang for some super freaky sex act, I AM IN! C, Since when does a lady of the Drunk even need a sponsor? And fifth, I lost count a while back. Fuckitalltohell!
Well, yeah, we could make up some freaky sex thing for it, but the po boy was seperate from the other. And, yeah!
a Po Boy is like a sub right?
GRRRRRR Weird regional dialect!
And more-so on this whole “sponsor” thing:
I’m fiending for some DICK!!! Somebody talk me out of it!!!
*Chodin leaps up from the dinner table, puts a butter knife to his throat*
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Po'boy
A Po-boy is NOT like a sub. A Po-boy is in every way superior to a sub. If you don’t know, your ass better call somebody!
you honkeys need to calm the fuck down and show some respect for b dogg renfro, he was really right after all, FUCK ALL Y’ALL
So I called somebody. Turns out a Po’ Boy is ebonics for a hobo.
A po’ boy (also po-boy, po boy, or poor boy) is a traditional submarine sandwich from Louisiana. It consists of meat or seafood, usually fried, served on a baguette.
With all do respect Joker, it sure as shit is a sub.
I bet a Po-boy feels like a fucking ninja shuriken coming out of your ass.
muthafucking raven be all like aww hell naw and shit <– Po’ boy??
It’s not just a sub. Turkey and cheese is a sub. You don’t get Po Boys at Subway.
Not even in Naw ‘lins Jack?
A Po-boy looks like it’d go Michael Vick on my lower intestines.
Fuck that.
I get my Po’boys from out front of the Home Depot. I let them build fences and reroof my house n shit.
I once heard that after you eat a Po-boy, it gets pissed out.
A po-boy is the Hero’s bastard cousin. There, i said it.
No, Po-boys are not available at Subway even in N.O. If any of you fuckers ever get down here we’ll go to Come Back Inn or Central Grocery and argue the merits of Po-Boys v. Subs/Heros or whatever the fuck you got.
You ever have one of those moments where you’re glad you were alone when you said something? I was backing my car in the parking lot earlier when I exclaimed to myself, "Yeah, everyone knows badasses back it in!"
I mean, they do, right?
GET ME A PO BOY!
wow, i never knew sandwiches held such controversy. Sorry bout that
How about Im making chicken and dumplings for dinner. No controversy there.
A Po-Boy is no mere sandwich Eib. It’s a badge of identity to the true New Orleanian. I grew up on those things. I guess it’s kinda like butter tarts to Canadians. Or tacos to Mexicans. Or warm, sticky shit on flatbreads to foreign brown people. We should be tolerant of each other’s differences and then poke fun at foreigners when they’re not around or don’t speak English.
I love you Eib. Chicken and dumplings are one of my favorite dishes from childhood.
I once heard that after you eat a Po-boy, it crawls out of your butt on its own.
A Po-Boy does sound good. Any idea where you can get one in Vegas?
I once heard that Mike Tyson tried to rape a Po-boy sandwich during an interview.
I once heard that when Peter North is too tired, he uses an impromptu Po-boy sandwich as a stand in.
mgm Emeril has a restaraunt there. yeah, the guy from New York
EIB- I fucking hate that furry little ewok but i may break my embargo for a delicious sammy. Thanks.
*incoming transmission*
The Mighty Fek’lhr once had the best fucking fried oyster/cole slaw po boy in Key West!
*end transmission*
One time in Texas I ordered a "veggie sandwich" from a deli (without looking at the menu, which was totally carnivorous). The deli guy looked at me like I was retarded, or an alien, or possibly a retarded alien, before saying "I don’t know how to make that".
(um… you know how you make a roast beef sandwich? Just like that, but without the beef)
hey that po boy thing looks good… WITH BLOOD!
Vegetarian< anal warts.
One time in Texas I ordered a "veggie sandwich" from a deli
(without looking at the menu, which was totally carnivorous). The deli guy looked at me likeI was retarded, or an alien, or possibly a retarded alien, before saying "I don’t know how to make that".(um… you know how you make a roast beef sandwich? Just like that, but without the beef)FIXED!, and SCREWED MYSELF!!
Al, the guy was probably trying to figure out if you were down syndrome or Canadian.
Ah naw he di’in’t!!!!!!!
You know, Marc Summers doesn’t have to help you, Nom…
Whatever the guy did, it was the best veggie sandwich I ever ate. Probably slipped some meat in there.
Yes, I know, Al. Have I told you lately that I love you? Even if you didn’t utilize Marc Summers for my benefit?
I once heard that a girl can only be brought to a squirting orgasm if she’s fed six Po-boys first.
I was a vegan once, than the waitress brought my steak and shrimp.
I was a vegan once, then the waitress brought my steak and shrimp.
6 Po Boys? She’ll be squirting out of her ass.
Do gay vegans suck dick?
Yes, but they don’t swallow.
*Chodin squeezes his hand shut and squirts water across the hot tub at Pauly*
You’re funny for a faggot.
How do I know? I let gay vegans suck my dick. Just so I can call them a "wanna-be vegan".
*Pauly makes fake gun with hand, winks, and shoots fake gun all while ejaculating at Chodin*
*Chodin face turns to his “concerned” look – a loaf of shit floats to the surface of the water, Chodin is happy again*
*Chodin checks his watch; wonders how everyone else on filmdrunk has been able to stay underwater for so goddamn long*
One summer when I was 13 and just starting to be a drunk, I drank 3 OE’s, broke into the public pool, swam, and jumped off the high dive. Right before I left, I took a shit in the pool.
Kind of a proud moment because I made the news.
One summer when I was 13 and just starting to
be a drunkmasturbate, Idrank 3 OE’s, broke into the public pool, swam, and jumped off the high dive. Right before I left, I took a shit in the pooldidn’t leave the house for three months.FIXED!
*GASP*
I can’t believe I held my breath that long!
I was just waiting for the right moment to resurface.
I started jacking off at 9. Been a pro ever since.
Pauly, I’ve got the same story only I was like 14 and went to visit my brother at UCLA. My parents made the mistake of letting me stay on campus with my brother; long story short, it only took me about 5 Rolling Rocks until the Bruins highdive became my own personal, 3-story urinal.
One summer when I was
13XIII and just starting tobe a drunkmasturbate, Idrank 3 OE’s, broke into the public pool, swam, and jumped off the high dive. Right before I left, I took a shit in the pooldidn’t leave the house forthreeIII months.DOUBLE FIXED!
Ah, to be young and drunk and have to take a shit.
Pauly, I’ve got the same story only I was like
14XIV and went to visit my brother at UCL150A. My parents made the mistake of letting me stay on campus with my brother; long story short, it only took me about5V Rolling Rocks until the Bruins highdive became my own personal,3III-story urinal.*a drunk looking, hairy Klingon drunkedly stumbles in*
FUCK! Does that squirting orgasm thing really work? Girls? Is it just piss? WTF?
*falls down face first on the floor. QAPLAH!*
Been a pro ever since.
Now I suddenly miss bne_pro.
I’ve drank 6 beers and no buzz yet. WHAT THE FUCK!
I just ate 6 Po Boys and no squirt yet. WHAT THE FUCK!
*drunk Klingon uses a barstool to pull Himself up*
Pauly, me lad, He must introduce you to bloodwine some time! The buzz is fucking guaranteed!!!!!!!
*falls off stool*
Pauly, those are my bottles of piss you’re chugging…and I want them back.
*loud mumbling heard from floor*
If fucking Clunker doesn’t take out some commies, He will demand a refund!!!
*gagging, dry heaving sounds heard*
{for reference, "Clunker" is "Mark 1" Iron Man}
Soccer is for FAGS
I own lots of futbol apparel and equipment from three different leagues. Coincidence? Or supporting evidence?
No deal Chod. One man’s piss is another man’s drink.
And Fek, I just can’t throwm blood in my vodka and call it blood wine? Because I’ll set this kid free if that’s the case.
Robo-you better not be from Ottumwa
Pauly-no need to set the kid free. You can always sacrifice the kid to Daehok
*Pauly’s head pops up from child’s carcass and has blood all over his mouth and hands*
Oh
Al, you will probably be missing bne_pro for a while. Did you hear about the big birthday present he got for his woman? He thinks he will be on the receiving end of sexual favors for quite some time.
*drunken scowling is heard from Klingon face down drunk on floor*
BAH! Sexual "favors"? What, like handing out the pussy once a fortnight whether she thinks He needs it or not?
*gurgling, bubbling sounds*
Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwyeahhhhhhhhh. Reming me to give Marc Summers some hot tongue action in the near future.
Remind me too also. K thanx
*Fek’lhr peruses the Nomination thread, sees that out of 83 comments that only one is a nomination for Him. Goes back to cutting Himself.*
Fek, I noticed your avatar hasn’t changed in a while. Dry spell?
*starts cutting a little deeper*
Fek, if I could function correctly on FD at work, there were a couple that you woulda got nommed for, I know for sure. So, take solace in that you lol’tag.
Like his email to MMMMMMMMMM BC???????
(just say yes)
I also noticed that you gave some love to the ladies earlier on in this thread so if you want to steer your ship in this direction, there may be a handy in it for you.
Fek, you can’t demand on nom, they just come to you. Just be yourself little buddy, and people will like you for who you are. Hey, I placed first last week and all it takes is 1 nom. I might be passing the crown to you this week, Pal.
Um…it’s not the size of the ship, it’s the motion of the ocean…right?
Sorry fek, I can’t say yes, for I am unaware what you mean. No empty praise coming from this direction. That’s called sarcasm.
I wouldn’t be too sad, Fek. Your blog gets posted everytime.
That is only true if you are in a very, very tiny ocean.
You guys know I am joking, right? Here’s a hint: never take me seriously unless I preface comments with "seriously" and speak in first person. Even then it’s like 50/50.
You guys know I am joking, right? Here’s a hint: never take me seriously unless I preface comments with "seriously" and speak in first person. Even then it’s like 50/50.
I’m still calling the authorities and telling them to go intervene. Couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t cause you a bunch of problems.
(ie)
Seriously: Wow, I am pretty drunk tonight! (true)
Seriously: Wow, I should let Lance’s gf out of my trunk so he will post CotW! (True!)
CotW up, over there.
See how easy that is?
Fek, I was going to nom your BC email, but I know Lance won’t pick it cuz it’s long. Speaking of which, adding all that "incoming message" stuff to your posts is probably why it’s not getting nommed (on account of the length).
P.S. at least you have one nom, damn it.
P.P.S. I’m entering Charlie into the MMMMMMMMMMbop contest (read page 2 of the BC thread if you don’t get this one).
Seriously: I gotta piss. (true)
Seriously: I might as well piss on Lance’s gf while she is here! (True!)
Robo-Thank you, genuinely. I will get my CotW some day when I forget to take my meds and get really pissed off at Marlene. Until then, I am fine pretending to be a Klingon and irritating lance, et al. :D
*Door opens. Two waitresses wheel in a giant cake. Chodin pops out*
Did I miss the party?
You have to eat the soggy cookie now, Chod.
*sad sideways face with a dick on top* 8=D :(
Actions indicated by asterisks are the epitome of heterosexuality.
Damn Heather, you hit the “sad sideways face” dick head on that one.
2 points.
Please don’t act like that was your first shift+8 action of the night. What are my points good for?
My friend just called me and updated me about Saturday night:
Apparently, I had got us kicked out of a strip club because I farted on a stripper while getting a lap dance. It all just came back to me right now. I forgot what I said during the dance but she got upset or something, so the dance went downhill from there. But just when she was on her knees rubbing her chest on my crotch, I let one loose. A big one. She got even more upset because I laughed and she had me thrown out.
I like hearing stories about things I did while drunk. Especially when I forget them and someone has to remind me. It’s like hearing it for the first time, but I was there! That makes me LOL out loud.
*Door opens. Two waitresses wheel in a giant cake. Chodin pops out*
Chodin always makes the best entrances. I’m jealous.
*hops away on moon shoes*
Where’s your skull covered tractor?
*Chodin pauses for a moment and eyes his work keyboard to see what the fuck [shift+8] is…he nods*
Heather: between you and i, those points aren’t going to get you shit.
but Pauly on the other hand: your points will earn you farty lapd ances from yours truly.
…and in the future, everyone will recieve “lapd ances”.
Way fucking better than a lap dance. Any day!
I was hoping to get my muffin toasted.
Oh. Then maybe if I return the points back to you you will quit being so bitter.
Chodin’s entrances > Van Dykes entrances
My Cambodian tractor is sequestered in the barn right now. It knows what it did.
The Mighty Fek’lhr will
shitforshak if Heather isn’t really a girl!Not likely Heather…sorry. Completely personal, this grudge here.
*Suddenly a white tiger leaps into the room, Chodin hushes the beast and climbs on top of it’s strong back. Heather can’t believe the magic in what she’s just seen. *
The Mighty Fek’lhr will
shitforshak IN HEATHER’S FISH TANK if Heather isn’t really a girl!Ficksed
Pauly, you should probably go apologize to that stripper you farted on – she’s bound to win an Oscar real soon.
Fek, I am only partially studied up on my acronyms and filmdrunk slang. I would say I understand a good 3/16 of it now.
Chodin, you are doing actions for me now? Ohhh, I like it. Someone’s knows his way to mypantsville.
Ok, that was a lie.
I think I told her to build a bridge and get over it.
*Ken Shamrock busts though the wall!*
CHOD!!!!!!!!
*tears white tiger in half and stuffs Chod in the guts like Luke Skywalker in a Taun Taun*
GRRRR…EMASCULATION!!!!!!!!
And wait, is the grudge because I didn’t earn my prison tattoo or is it because I didn’t offer a hot carl upon meeting you?
*Fek’lhr Googles "hot carl"*
Dor sho gha!
SHAMROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Goddamn boy, that was my last white tiger!
Heather: Your “mypantsville” probably looks an awful lot like Barstow, California.
And hot carl’s were never really my thing anyways, I’m more of a ‘Danza Slap’ kinda’ boy.
WHY YES ILL HAVE A HEAPIN-HELPING OF SHITTOCK COCKBROTH AND A SIDE OF NIPPLEDASH
Is a "Hot Carl" a sandwich?
A hot Carl is that sweaty plumber in your basement.
BTW, we all do actually know what a hot carl is. That is so 2007. Try harder next time, n00b!
Now "space docking", that’s where it’s at!!!People always told me I had the butt-crack to be a plumber.
WHAT MANNER OF SHITCHRIST IS THIS!!!!!!!
I SHALL WAIT IN THE WINGS WITH MY DICKDART AND POP HER STINKBALLOONS!!!!!!
Alright, well not that I didn’t “finish” or anything, but it’s time for this grommit to venture homo *cough* home.
DRUNK on, mother fuckers.
*A Bald Eagle soars through the hole that Shamrock smashed. The bird grips Chodin’s skull like a Nerf ball and head to the nearest Chuck E’ Cheese.*
If by Barstow, California you mean a rainbow coated unicorn dashing through a field of beer and candy, then yes. Identical.
…
The Mighty Fek’lhr wonders if Heather is Lanky Mangina’s gf? If so, He has a lot of explaining to do…
Still the Undefeated Unified Champion of Dursting!
How often does Gah Durchfall actually come up in conversation here? I need to know.
Didn’t you piss on Lance’s girlfriend earlier? Is your keyboard wet/sticky? That would be a major clue.
I’m no one you know. If I was, I’d have better things to make fun of you about. Did I miss Lanky Mangina in the study guide?
How often does Gah Durchfall actually come up in conversation here?
Only as often as it needs to!
Did I miss Lanky Mangina in the study guide?
Lanky Mangina=Lance Mangina=Lance Martini=the guy that runs this site
BTW, The Mighty Fek’lhr has been considering renaming His blog to "A Cry For Help". He suggests you just read the FD guide and leave the rest alone.
Too late! I’ve already reviewed a good amount of it. Why does he (Fek’lhr) refer to himself in third person, though?
And fantastic, Lanky’s girlfriend must be amazing.
THE HULK DOES NOT LIKE FACIST DICKWADS! ESPECIALLY ONES THAT SHOOT HIM IN TO SPACE! TONY STARK CAN FUCK A BOWL OF AIDS! OH, SNAP! HULK SMASH! HULK BURN!
HULK = SHAMROCK?
Lanky Mangina
I am actually rather stocky. Shit, I channelled Glen by accident again.
So I’ve been lurking on this site for a long, long time, and I have finally decided that I’ve got to make a name just so I can nom on CoTW. You guys make my life worth living (too much too soon?)
Don’t worry, except for this one, I won’t post anything lame because, quite frankly, I’m terrified of the backlash! Someday though, I hope to join the other girls as a true member of the PFC. I’ll willing to do *whatever* it takes (wink, wink).
Are you from Oregon??
That was for Lancy Pants. Not Sassy Pants.
Ha! OK, because I didn’t know if you comparing me to Glen already was an insult or not.
BONG!
[Sorry, PFC bylaws require us to hit the ba'Sin for new people.]
*rides away on the Angry Panda Welcome Wagon (also covered wif skulls)*
What is this PFC shit? A girl gets the flu and suddenly her club is disbanded?
I liked your club better BK.
BK, you are a General in the PFC Army.
*Pauly rides in on a razor scooter*
I’m having a bum wash my car for a 40oz. That’s a gonga! He let me use his scooter while he washes my whip.
Pauly, a razor scooter? I’m so hot for you right now.
BK, we only keep mentioning PFC because we DO NOT TALK ABOUT TICKLE CLUB.
The Circle Jerk Club can always use a hand.
I do believe I coined the phrase Tickle Fight. Props to me, yo!
BK – I didn’t mention the tickle club because, wll, let’s face it, I’m nowhere near cool enough to get into the tickle club
*Book case slides open; Chodin comes strolling out.*
Did somebody say BTK???
I’m not even cool enough to spell out the word "well" completely
I don’t want to be combative here, Chino, but I’m pretty sure Alexander the Great coined the phrase Tickle Fight.
Me thinks you’re wrong, Panda. i will have my revenge! And by revenge, I mean I will sulk in the corner…
Robo…with all the love in the world: I want to shove your avatar in a bear trap.
I want to shove Chodin in my clap trap.
Good luck Chino, I used to play ESPN Prime Time on SEGA…Deion Sanders taught me all the basics.
My great Grandma, Maggie Mae Dangerously started the first Circle Jerk Club chapter here in Tucson. Before Arizona was a state.
Back then it was called “The Jumping Cactus Jamboree”.
I want to introduce my avatar to "ring bear" from Lance’s Busey post, after Lance has taken the chocolate away.
You can’t fuck what you can’t catch.
chodin: the correct thing to say to chino would be "You will never find me". Maybe throw in "Breech Unborn".
If Gary Busey fought a wizard…who do you think would win?
Fred Savage’s friend, hands down.
With the power glove?
Nommy, I do love you so. You know me so well.
I don’t know, but I can pound the shit out of a wizard sleeve.
BK – I thought you started the PFC. It’s late. I’m tired. And horny. Pillow fight, anyone?
I love the power glove.
I glove the power love.
I give the power luv. Ing. Yeah, it’s no good.
It’s not a pillow fight, damnit. It’s a tickle fight. Geez.
WTF is up with this "loving glove"? Because I think I want one. Nay, I NEED one. Help?
I think the loving glove is a fifi. That is a PiPi for you and me, Al.
The loving glove is a fifi.
Al, picture 100 dicks all strapped to a magic glove, and then picture yourself 7-years-old playing with it…that’s basically the ‘power glove’.
Robbed by seconds.
A little late, Jack!
BONG!!!
Thank you all for the confirmation. I am no longer in want of the loving glove. Now I just want a PiPi.
I have an extra PiPi and it
cumscomes in purple!Watch this…
I have to poop.
Jack! hates this!
So did Alexander the Great. Greeked again, Chino.
I hate pooping?
Shit-fuckers: IRON MAN.
Let’s stay on the goddamn topic.
But it feels so good!
You don’t like it when I talk about pooping. But eveyone knows that girls don’t poop. That’s what makes it so funny!
pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooop
I hated that yellow car. I don’t know why Ivan Stewart let such a shitty car be in his game.
Everybody poops! Except for Michael Stipe.
Jesus Christ…..now Chino’s a girl??? Oh fuck….oh fuck…the room is spinning.
I got greeked again??? DOR SHO GAH!!!
And I don’t really even know what that means.
Chodin, I’ve been a girl ever since "the operation".
Can Lance get like a pink text/blue text code worked out for this fucking site!? All the chicks look like dudes, all the dudes talk about slaying dick, and then I have to come along and try to piece this puzzle together!? It’s like “Murder She Wrote” only now nearly as violent.
"Greeked" means you got fucked. In the ass.
Oh well, then I turned greek when I was 13.
For reals!
You mean fucked with a Kalamata Olive? Or a sun dried tomato? If so, then yes, I have been Greeked.
I’m a chick with a dick
For Reals
So, you are a dude in touch with your feminine side. Don’t ask, don’t tell! It’s all good here.
I had another awesome hair dair.
I mean..uh…
GRRRR BARFIGHT!
I got Greeked
when I was in Greecewhen I met chodinwhen I met Fek’lhrwhen I met pre-op Chino.What’s a hair dair?
Good night, kiddies.
*Chodin grabs a nearby baby, cracks it in half over his head and begins to stab at anyone near him.*
I got Greeked by a gyro.
Did I say hair day? I meant hair pie.
You got off with a gyro?? Try getting some hummus all up in your stuffis…
Chino…are you sure that you’re a fucking girl?
I mean, it’s cool dude…you can tell me that you’re not.
Punt her cunt.
So long, jerkwads!
*Chodin and Pauly remain above the surface of the hot tub…silence.*
Here’s a tip, Lance: Will Arnett just admitted to killing hobos on Conan O’Brien.
I am truly a girly. I cry at toilet paper commercials and I adore shoes. Need I sy more?
That would be "say"…
The typo only solidifies that I am a girl. I got all emotional,
You forgot the “pus”.
Who the fuck else was in on “Chino being a girl” ?!? Was it Clooney? Haha, where’s George? Where’s George? That fucking cocksucker, always playing around! Haha, where’s….where’s….fuck.
Do you mean Geroge?? Do you hate me now?
Geroge Washingto was a great man, and his name should only be spoken after you brush your fucking teeth…
…now go floss your crotch.
Chodin, you scare me, but I (heart) you.
¿Donde esta Santa Claus?
Martha Washingto had wooden teeth in her vagina.
Aqui. Con El Pauly Peligroso.
Ich essen kinder broten.
Ich heiBe Chodin.
p.s. Two years German…two years C+.
Fuck you Frau Kitsburg.
Shizer! I failed spanish but I know a plethora of wetbacks.
I hated Deutsch…but I sure as hell loved shitting on people!
*Bubble turn off in hot tub. Pauly farts in hot tub*
*Chodin finishes his Boone’s Farm- glances around.*
Ah, now where the fuck did everybody go?!
Zog Durst
If you just had to decorate a torture chamber, what sort of wallpaper would you use?
Kurgan, if craigslist ad photos are anything to go by, you must use medium-toned wood paneling, and at least one mirror won at a carnival.
nine fucking pages of comments? this is sad.
Cool, i have Lynyrd Skynyrd or Molly Hatchet…which would you go with?
Ug. Me keep rollin rollin rollin.
(come on)
Lance won the BC prize pack. We may never see him again.
ZOG!! I love him
Anybody else concerned that scientists say we’re dead in three years? What a morbid advertiser.
UG! WHAT MEANS DEAD?!!
Well with my drinking habits I figured that was pretty accurate anyway.
COTW, yIngtaghs!
christians don’t believe in this poster