NEW INDIANA JONES PICTURES
02.13.08
L’Espresso has these three new pictures from the upcoming Spielberg/Lucas joint Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. God I’m tired of typing that.
Picture 1: I’m too old for this shit!
Picture 2: Oh my God look at her act! Let’s burn her name on the surface of the moon!
Picture 3: Indy Returns to Ethnic Town – Hey, is that Brian Setzer?
You may also remember that Indiana Jones drank from the Holy Grail at the end of the last Indiana Jones movie so we can only assume he’s going to live forever. Meanwhile George Lucas is three bacon strips away from congestive heart failure.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/global/images/default-avatar.jpg){kind=avatar}
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/Jar-Jar-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/George-Lucas-Melody-Hobson-150x150.jpg)
Chuckles the Clown got arrested for pointing
his dickat Harrison Ford.Uh oh! You know how much Dr. Jones hates snakes!
*Spike Lee logs onto fimdrunk; pulls a double-take at “…Spielberg/Lucas joint…” *
Spike Lee: “Wha-the!? What-the!? Ahhhhhh helllll naw! Those white cracka’s cannot take that shit from my people! Ah hell naw!!!! VADER WAS WHITE!!!!! “
I know, they should make a spoof film called "Geriatric Adventure Movie" just to guarantee the second coming of christ and the fire and brimstone and the oceans turning to blood, etc. I’ll be hiding in my basement after the rapture with my tinned food and my bottled water. I’ll be reading by candlelight.
No Lance, if you recall, God’s sense of humor demanded that if anyone wanted to live forever they had to live alone inside a cave with a bunch of cups and a basin full of water.
Think that dude ever jumped into the cavern or threw himself onto those spinning blade just for fun? What the fuck else would he have to do for 400 years?
p.s. “fimdrunk” has waaaayyyyy more racy comments than filmdrunk.
Oh chodie, you silly kidder, there is no "fimdrunk", but that was hilarious. Don’t go to Google people, that crazy chodin is just pulling our legs. What a card!
.
.
.
Asshole.
*doctress leisa begins to climb over chodin and lick the computer screen on their computer*
chodin: “what the fuck are you doing!?”
doctress: “they said asshole!!!”
chodin: “yeah i know, my friend hairy called me an ‘asshole’ ”
*doctress leisa eats the computer monitor*
END SCENE.
Stay classy, chodin.
dibs on Cate Blanchett BTK
bitch bring your prissy brittish ass inside my van!!, not you bryce, Cate, bryce could you
just go now?, I can’t BTK if you’re watching, thanks, hey maybe we’ll go play guitar hero at Jacks! place allright? ok talk to you later man, bye.
Indiana Jones: Legend of the Broken Hip
Tell me more about this lespressing.
Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. God I’m tired of typing that.
What kind of lazy film blogger are you? Program your function keys as follows:
F1 – Bruckheimer
F2 – Ratner
F3 – Uwe Boll
F4 – Lucas
F5 – Speilberg
F6 – JJ Abrams
F7 –
CloverfieldIndiana Jones and theF8 – Kingdom of
F9 – Empty Balloon of
F10 – The Crystal Skull
F11 – Geratol
F12 – shortcut to porn
"Indy, cover your artificial heart!"
Indiana Jones: and BLOOD!
"I AM FUCKING SICK OF THESE MOTHER FUCKIN’ SNAKES ON MY MOTHER FUCKING CANE!"
Indiana Jones and Those Damn Kids On My Fucking Lawn
Get it? He needs a cane because he’s so old. And he hates snakes. But he loves Samuel L. Jackson.
It’s funny – it’s a big hat.
*bryce starts a collection to purchase bacon strips*
“Indiana Jones and the Dick of George Lucas”
…it would be a short.
*POW!!!! A fucking pie hits chodin across the jaw.*
*FWAP!!! A fucking dick hits chodin across the eyes.*
A Google ad appeared in the margin with the title "Stop Smoking Laser Center".
I don’t know if it’s meant to help me quit smoking, quit smoking lasers, or to rally support to put an end to lasers that are smoking.
“L’Espresso” is what the Elephant man orders from Starbucks.
Indiana Jones and the Hospice Order to DC all Meds and Do Not Resuscitate
___/\___/\___/\___________________________
Stone: Maybe “Smoking Laser Center” is a really kick-ass nightclub, but they continually violate their “maximum occupancy” and must now be stopped?
“Indiana Jones and the Klingon Named Fek”
It’s just Fek and Indiana hanging out in a trailer all day, but Fek keeps calling people on his phone to come over, and when they enter the trailer Dr. Jones punches them in the stomach.
"L’Espresso" is what the Elephant man orders from Starbucks.
Actually, once that poor cat with the white painted stripe on her back finishes running from Pepe LePue, she orders one of those to recharge.
It’s not the years, it’s the mileage.
Apparently Dr. Jones has been round the fucking sun.
but Fek keeps calling people on his phone to come over, and when they enter the trailer Dr. Jones punches them in the stomach.
That’s funny cuz that’s what my Jewish Marine Neighbor does to me all the time!
But here’s how Joseph Merrick would do it.
*Elephant Man enters Starbucks*
“I wan….wan….*drool*…..*drool*…………*dribble*…….*drool*……I wan……a……….L’Espresso….”
*Leans head back and dies immediately.*
Guy’cha! That Forshak Milkshake lover over at Without Laughter posted a story The Mighty One posted for him, and didn’t give any credits/props to Him!
The Mighty Fek’lhr is going to go kill that guy’s favourite Duke basketball player!
Here’s what the response would be:
"This is Paris and it’s 1910 you freak – what’s an ‘Espresso’? Now go away, or I shall taunt you a second time-a."
…if 3 people durst a thread, does it make a sound?
waggles finger and yells Get off my lawn.
…if 3 people durst a thread, does it make a sound?
BONG!!!i
…so…um…I’ve really got nothing here.
*chodin glances down at his hands, holding his dick and balls*
…nothing.
DOCKAH JONES! DOCKAH JONES! ME LOVE YOU LONG TIME!
fek, please tell me what exactly that avatar is…it looks like a small, retarded guy dressed up as a hairy klingon?
I wonder who’s the genius that thought sending an ad for Hannah Montana ringtones to FilmDrunk was a good idea.
And on the subject of Hannah Montana. Would you? Of course you would.
And on the subject of Hannah Montana. Would you?
With a wiffle ball bat.
The best bit from ALL the Indy movies was when Indy bricked in Shortround’s mouth. Cinematic gold! That Harrison Ford gets plenty of fiber, that was a firm loaf…
” Would you? ”
WITH BLOOD!!!!!!!!!!
…looks like a small, retarded guy dressed up as a hairy klingon?
Versus all the tall, retarded guys dressed up as hairy Klingons? I mean really, what’s the difference? Retardation scoffs at altitude.
Hannah Montana-She’s too
oldyoung.Chod-My avatar is a guy from Riverside Iowa dressed like a Klingon doing magic tricks and making balloon animals for kids at Trek Fest (an annual retard event in Riverside, Iowa {The Future Birthplace of Captain James T. Kirk…for real}).
I will upload the full size so you can witness it in all of it’s gloryhole.
I sure do wish I knew where I could find some single millionaires right about now.
Just wanted to wave "Hi"
http://img135.imageshack.us/img135/8589/pederastklingoncn4.jpg
It’s basically the Klingon equivalent of Chuckles the Clown: Duras the yIntagh Pederast
So in terms of fictional characters Iowa gets to claim James Tiberius Kirk and Nebraska gets to claim Larry The Cable Guy?
*shrugs*
Seems fair…
That’s one even keel.
holy shit fek….in no way does your avatar even hint at the magnitude of the full size gloryhole.
Next movie: Indiana Jones and the Enlarged Prostate: Search for the Golden Shower
Hey, I know! How about we do a Top Ten list for Things Duras the yIntagh Pederast has been arrested for?BONG!!!, signed-Lance Martini
fek, i want to take your avatar home with me and feed him lunchables all month.
Lance Martini was once arrested for having a terrible fake name.
Lance Martini has an evil twin brother called Lance Apple Martini.
Fek, what I’m wondering, seeing as it’s Valentine’s Day and all, is what’s up with those ladies behind this Klingon warrior?
Lance Martini took yoga classes for 6 months but stopped as he was too busy.
Lance Martini has an evil twin brother called
LanceApple Martini.FIXED!
what’s up with those ladies behind this Klingon warrior?
Actually, that’s my mom and wife! :D
NOT!!!!!!!!!!
Lance Martini has a cousin named Tyrone Manhattan.
And it’s mostly girls! Damn Iowans are hard up!
Lance Martini’s boyfriend is Pee Wee Zima.
Dang didn’t see page 2.
Lance Martini is really more of a Harvey Wallbanger…if you know what I mean.
Lance Martini has a cat named "Olive".
Lance Martini has a
catgerbil named "Olive".So, do you guys want to see some more hot action from Trek Fest 2005?
BRB.
Lance Martini was once hugged by Michael J. Fox. James Bond was heard to say "yeah, that’s about right."
This thread has Lance Martini shaken, but he has not stirred.
That’s too bad, Fek. I was putting together a nice swinger offer. It involved a bottle of Wild Turkey and my Lisa Rinna Pocket Lips.
Lance Martini once adopted a Vietnamese son and legally had the boy’s name changed to Concubine Martini.
By popular demand: More Trek Fest Pictures of Awesomeness!
http://dirtyhairy.blogspot.com/2008/02/trek-fest-2005.html
Lance’s wife was named Virgin Daiquiri. After he ran through her, she changed it to Dirty Martini.
fek: i’m dying here…in my pants…you’re killing my dick.
i need some pedialyte out of a young boys penis ASAP!
DAMMIT JHC—–I WANT TO MAKE LOVE TO YOU!!
again
Lespresso is a small lesbian publishing house.
In Seattle.
If you’d ever get your ass out of Canad-eh, you could shoot me with your gun (on C.O.D.4) Luch. Are fun and games outlawed in Canad-eh? Are "your people" buying the whole fuckin’ country?
That’s too bad, Fek. I was putting together a nice swinger offer. It involved a bottle of Wild Turkey and my Lisa Rinna Pocket Lips.
None of my garments have pockets that big.
Lance Martini reads Cosmopolitan.
B-B-B ..hold on my cell’s ringing……*slams cell down yells COWABUNGA!* B-BOOSH!
Nightstalker. Brings back memories…
Lance Martini played the role of Cosmopolitan on many Sex and the City episodes. He has an aversion to horses to this day.
Is it just a coincidence that the post ID for this story is 1138?
I’ve had a shitty day, and I just got here.
You are permitted to fill me in on what I’ve missed.
AGB, are they about how hot it was the summer he was out having his fun, and how even though you were scared to death, you just had to leave the window open, until he went and killed someone down the road from you? Cause those are my fondest memories
Wiz, it is, thx for letting us know.
Eib, no.
oh, ok, my bad
Jack – see Comments Nomination thread. It’s been a regular love fest here today.
By the way, I made Lisa Rinna on my Wii last night.
Thanks Stone
wow, thats totally gay wiz…literally…im impressed
Jack, is that a veiled fifi reference?
By the way, I made Lisa Rinna on my Wii last night.
What a co-winky-dink! I made Harry Hamlin on the toilet this morning!!!!
::slaps coworker on the ass as they walk by:: Good game Melanie!!
By the way, I made Lisa Rinna on my Wii last night.
I made wee on Lisa Rinna’s lips last night. They’re everywhere.
Thanks Stone
You do have cookies…
Jack-Just check my blog, it will fill you in.
BTW:
L’espresso means "The really strong coffee" in French.
L’espresso means durst in icelandic.
It means double durst in Choctaw, weird.
Les Presso is a guy I went to high school with.
HeI always shovedmehim intomyhis locker.BONG!!!!!!!
Yeah, Les Presso always used a bong. He was a real pot head. Not me, though. Winners don;t use, and users don’t win.
Les Presso has his office walls marked with tape on the carpet.
Is the last picture from the original Indiana Jones movie? I only ask because if it’s from the new one, shouldn’t he have his pants pulled up to his nipples?
Lance Martini’s only credit on imDb.com is a "special thanks" from Tom Cruise for loaning him that copy of Dianetics on the set of Cocktail.
Indy knows that you can kill snake, right? Like…snake can be killed. It’s possible to do.
Winners don;t use, and users don’t win.
But what if my mantra is "Winners never quit, and quitters never win"? That entitles me to carry on with pretty much any debauchery I see fit, so long as I’ve done it before.
Al!!! if said debauchery involves braiding of hair and a pillow fight, count me in
I dunno about that chod, I try to strangle my snake every night, but it still wiggles when I look at my wife’s boobs.
only provided you’re good at it and thus "winning"
So long as you really DO have cookies, Eib, and that’s not just some cruel joke to lure me to the dark side, then yes. Yes it does.
Les Presso has his office walls marked with tape on the carpet.
A+++
In preproduction: Indiana Jones and the Quest for his Missing Hat and Whip: They’re Probably Near My House if You Can Help Me Remember Where That Is…
Also in PreProduction – Indiana Jones and HOW DO YOU WORK THIS INTERNET THING?
*blushes adorably
Indiana Jones and Alzheimers: Time Travel Without the Machine
Indiana Jones Has Fallen and He Can’t Get Up
[on topic]
Someone help me out here, is the new premise of the Jones movies that aliens are responsible for all the magic objects he’s found? No god or Sheba or whatever, just alien gizmos disguised as the Shankara Stones, the Ark, and the Grail?
Isn’t that the premise of Stargate?
[/on topic]
Indiana Jones and we get it, he’s old.
Indiana Jones – Now with less James Spader
You call him "Doctor Emeritus Jones" lady!
Holy shit, I never really had it going today.
I have to write "LOVE YOU" really big on my forehead since he can’t read my eye lids anymore.
Oh Indy, what happened to the magic? I SAID WHAT HAPPENED TO THE…oh nevermind, go back to sleep dear.
Oh Michelle, that gave me a little girl crush, sincerly.
No, Hairy, that is the premise of Scientology.
And, I do have some cookies people. I do indeed.
Indiana Jones b so old he knew JHC when he was a teenager.
*SMB returns to seclusion*
Indiana Jones and the Circulation-Enhancing Support Stockings of the Pharoahs
Sorry, Stone, but the riff still isn’t nearly as old as the good Doctor…
Indiana Jones and the Corrective Inserts of Chichen-Itza: Raising the Fallen Arches of the Mayans
Indiana Jones and the Failing Liver of King Solomon. and such.
Indiana Jones and His High School Buddy, Bob Dole.
Indiana Jones and the Temple of Golden Artifacts from the Ancestors Holy Archeological Discovery Foundation of the Lost Garden of Jesus.
Indiana Jones and the Foot Doctor.
Indiana Jones and the Adult-Onset Diabeetus.
Indiana Jones and the Shameful Realization of No Longer Having Control of His Faculties.
Indiana Jones and the Hey, You Kids Get Off My Lawn of Destiny!
Indiana Jones and the Adult Undergarments of Lazarus.
Indiana Jones and the Rustling of Hard Candy Wrappers.
Indiana Jones and the Daunting Task of Estate Planning in Regards to One’s Last Will and Testament.
Or…..
Indiana Jones and the Ever Rising Costs of Christian Burial.
Indiana Jones and the Problems with Kids Today.
Indiana Jones and the Rustling of Hard Candy Wrappers.
LOL!
Indiana Jones and the ORIGINAL Werthers Original.
Indiana Jones and the Four Pounds of Pills He Has to Take Every Day.
Indiana Jones and the Non-Cancerous Growth on His Forehead.
Indian Jones and the Family of No Recollection.
Indy: Who the fuck are you?
JHC: It’s me Grandpa, Jeebus!
I: I don’t know any Jeebus. Did you take my pudding you little fucker?
J: So what if I did you old fuck? In about 10 seconds, you aren’t going to remember that you had pudding in the first place. Where’s your wallet, you wrinkled up walking fart bag?
Indiana Jones and the Colonscopy of Caution.
Indiana Jones and the Retirement Castle.
Indiana Jones and the Time I Went to Ebbets Field to See My First Dodgers Game.
Indiana Jones Fathers Orville Redenbacher
Indiana Jones and Da Cwasades Faw His Feef
Indiana Jones and California Johnson: Archeologist Assasins!
Indiana Jones and the Can of Chey Boy-Ar-Dee in His Cabinet That Expired Ten Years Ago.
Indiana Jones and the Pong Game
Indiana Jones and the Four Dollar Birthday Check.
Indiana Jones and the Infernal Pacemaker
Indiana Jones and the DVD Player of Frustration.
Indiana Jones and the Nitro Pills of Zanzanzabar
Indiana Jones and the Visiting Nurse That Bathes Him.
Indiana Jones and the Green Polyester Pants.
or…
Indiana Jones and the Double Wide in Florida Where the AC is Always Set to Like 40 Degrees.
Indiana Jones and the Land before Nazis
Indiana Jones and the Uphill Schoolhouse.
Indiana Jones and That Time We Bombed the Japs.
Indiana Jones and the Stairlift of Eternity.
Indiana Jones and the Christmas Angioplasty
Indiana Jones and the Stuff That Cleans His Dentures When He’s Sleeping.
or…
Indiana Jones and the what the hell was I talking about?
Indiana Jones and His Outdated Set of Encylopedias.
Indiana Jones and the Crazy Noises In His Ears
Indiana Jones Races Against Time In His Walker to Reach the Urinal
Indiana Jones and the Phlegm of Awakening
Indiana Jones and the Curling Rock of Destruction.
Indiana Jones and the Time He Didn’t Make It to the Bathroom.
Indiana Jones and the Hearing Aid with a Low Battery
Indiana Jones and the Golf Cart of Justice
Indiana Jones and the Hair That Grows Everywhere But On His Head.
Indiana Jones and the Utter Disregard for Most Traffic Laws.
Indiana Jones and the Flying Cars of 2010
Indiana Jones and the Magical Colonoscopy Bag.
Indiana Jones and the Hip Replacement Surgery.
Indiana Jones and the Curling Rock of Destruction.
AGB, I love your Canadian-ass!
Indiana Jones and the Pointing Prude
Indiana Jones and the HOVEROUND!!!!!!!
Indian Jones and the Racist Remarks Because When He Was A Boy You Could Talk Like That
Indiana Jones and the Eggcrate Pad on His Mattress That Keeps Him From Getting Bedsores
Is curling a Canadian thing? I thought it was an old person thing, like collecting ketchup packets for later use.
Indiana Jones and His Funeral Wake
Indiana Jones and the Discovery of Online Porn: Whoda Thunk A Cleveland Steamer Meant That?
Indiana Jones and the Craftmatic Adjustable Bed of Salvation.
Indiana Jones and the Guy He Nearly Ran Over With His Rascal.
Indiana Jones and The Urn He Now Lives In.
Indiana Jones and the Nursing Home of Doom
Indiana Jones and the Complete Confusion at the Supermarket.
Indiana Jones and the Unstoppable Conversation of Rambling
Indiana Jones and the Seven People Who Live in His Walls.
Indiana Jones and The Gout.
Indiana Jones Wakes Up Early to Make Sure That Damn Paperboy Is On Time
Indiana Jones and the Time He Tried to Pay for Underwear at K-Mart with His Bamburger’s Card.
Indiana Jones and The Prescription That Cost More Than He Thought
Indiana Jones and the Bible He Puts in His Underwear In Order to Fit Into the Clothes His Fat, Deceased Older Brother Left Him.
Indiana Jones and the ’89 Ford Crown Victoria
Indiana Jones and the Retirement Villa Orgy of Wrinkled Flesh Slapping Together.
Indiana Jones and the Mass Gross Out Factor of Telling Your Grandkids About Seeing Deep Throat in Theatre.
Indiana Jones and the Complete Inability to Remember Names.
Indiana Jones and the Turn Signal That Is Always On.
Indiana Jones Gets His Prescriptions Delivered to His Door With No Out of Pocket Expense
Indiana Jones and Say Pardon Not What!
Indiana Jones and the Enormous Eyebrows.
Indiana Jones and the Ears That Have Started Growing Bigger in His Seventies.
Indiana Jones Goes to Walmart for Depends and Centrum Silver
Indiana Jones and The Never Ending Left Turn Signal
Indiana Jones and the Twelve Missing Television Remotes.
Indiana Jones and The Bottle of Ovaltine
Indiana Jones and the Air Raid Sirens
Indiana Jones and the Cat He Forgot to Feed.
Indiana Jones and The Lost Remote Control
Indiana Jones and his regret about looking at his 15 year old grandaughters all evening long
Indiana Jones and the Bloody Stool.
Fucking Jacktion!
Indiana Jones and the Voter Registration Booth
Indiana Jones and the WHAT THE FUCK? YOU GUYS ARE REPEATING ALL OF THE ONES THAT I CAME UP WITH! SERIOUSLY! FUCKING STOP IT NOW, YOU ASSHOLES!
Indiana Jones and His Beta VHS
Indiana Jones and the Stories of His Days in the Military.
Indiana Jones Touches Jacktion! Inappropriately
Indiana Jones and the Newscaster That He Doesn’t Like.
Indiana Jones and the Fact That He Doesn’t Realize That People on TV Aren’t Actually in His Living Room.
In case you couldn’t tell, I am drawing on actual experiences for almost all of these.
Indiana Jones and the Cookies in the Freezer.
…or batteries, advil, etc. Basically if you keep anything but Hot Pockets or hookers’ body parts in your freezer, you’re old.
Indiana Jones and the Neighbor Across the Street Who Took His Heating Pad, But Then He Found It In His Closet A Month After The Guy Died, So An Angel Must Have Killed Him Because He Stole It And Then Brought It Back To Indy.
Indiana Jones and the Standing 69
Indiana Jones and the Commode He Keeps in the Dining Room.
Indiana Jones and the Damned Oxygen Tanks He Has To Drag With Him Everywhere.
And I’m spent.
Boy, I may not have been around for very long, but I sure needed this.
Indiana Jones and The Dimension of Dimentia
Indiana Jones and the Neighbor Across the Street Who Took His Heating Pad, But Then He Found It In His Closet A Month After The Guy Died, So An Angel Must Have Killed Him Because He Stole It And Then Brought It Back To Indy.
you kicked ass today jack!
Indiana Jones and why this country is going to hell in a handbasket.
Indiana Jones and the orderlies who beat him every night yet magically don’t leave a bruise.
Indiana Jones and the cave made out of two chairs and a blanket in the hallway.
Indiana Jones and the legend of the five cent gallon of milk.
Indiana Jones and the mystery of forwarding emails without embedding the thirty eight previous ones.
Always late to the fucking party. I’m gonna keep talking to myself then…
Indiana jones and those fucking mexicans ruining this country
Indiana Jones and the plastic covered couch.
Indiana Jones and stories you don’t want to hear about your grandmother.
Ok, that’s out of my system now.
ANY MORE CHEETOS BACK THERE?
The Adventures of a young Indiana Jones: Going to school in a blizzard, uphill both ways
Indiana Jones and the Joke That Lost It’s Steam
indiana jones y el santo contra los vampiros satanicos
Indiana Jones and the Joke That Lost It’s Steam
Indiana Jones and how he remembers steam engines.
Jacktion! wins.
Indiana Jones Goes To Coloredtown after dark.
Jack may have had quantity, but mine were all quality!
Indiana Jones and the Little Difibrillator That Could
And I’m out
*drops mic on the floor, exits stage left, and punches female fan in the cunt on the way out*
I’m still on page four, and I can’t get over the unnerving thought that Jacktion! is either eighty or hangs out at retirement homes and VFW halls a lot.
Indiana Jones and the Adventure of the Ingrown Toenail
What? No love for the Voter Registration Booth? *sigh*
Indiana Jones and the Dropped Bladder of Balthaazar
I have a couple of elderly grandmas too, Jack.
Indiana Jones and the Stack of Clipped Coupons for More Fruit Cups Than He Could Reasonably Eat in a Year of Destiny
Indiana Jones and the Automatic Phone Attendant of Perplexity: Press Two for Adventure!
Indiana Jones and the One Lady Who Still Knows How to Work a Roller Set That Looks Just Like the One Maime Eisenhower Used Before State Dinners of International Intrigue
SP. you had this one comin’!
BONG!!!
*Pauly picks mic back up and yells “Chinga tu madre!” drops mic and kicks female fan in the face who was on all fours due to previous cunt punch*
Holy shit! I’m drunk and this guy knocks on the door and he cleans carpets and he wants to see my living room! Should I untie him?
Indiana Jones And The Always Blinking Left Turn Signal Of Eternity.
Indiana Jones and the Nice Colored Lady Who Helps Him Take a Shower Three Days a Week
Indiana Jones and the No-Good Bastard of a Son Who Only Comes Around for a Handout When His Fat Wife Spends the Mortgage Payment on Malomars
Indiana Jones And The Young Man Who Walks Around The Grocery Store With Him Helping Him Reach Things On The Low Shelf.
Indiana Jones and the Quest for a Doctor Who Will Give Him Yet Another Cortisine Shot for His Bursitis
Indiana Jones and the Search for Free Samples of His Liver Pills
Indiana Jones And The Prostate Exam Of Ramses
*thump thump* Is this thing on?
Come to think of it, I should get my grandma together with Jacktion’s grandpa, I bet they’d make a charming couple.
Indiana Jones and the search for Metimucil.
Indiana Jones and the Prepaid Funeral Plot of Inevitability
Ack! I tripped over the cord on the way to the stage.
Indiana Jones and the “Hello…Hellooo…..I don’t think anyone’s there…Hellooo” phone call.
Indiana Jones And The Inevitable Hip Replacement.
indiana jones and that one time he and his wife tried out a pair of vibrating anal eg…
BONG!
Indiana Jones and the Open Forty-four Year Old Box of Baking Soda in the Back of His Fridge of the Covenant
Indiana Jones And The Medicaiders Of The Lost Ark
Indiana Jones and the mysterious case of the beaten dead horse
Indiana Jones and the Dead Spouse’s Cigar Stained Barcalounger That He Refuses to Throw Out Because the Living Room Will Look Funny With a Big Hole Over There and Besides You’ll Never Get the Dents out of the Shag Carpet of Secrets
Seduction: Has anyone introduced you to the first five pages of this thread?
Muthafucka, apparently this thread was good, cuz it’s on 6 pages and it’s only a wednesday. Fucking employers. I applied to two jobs in the last hour because of their internet banning asses. When I go to leave, they’ll be begging me to get paid for being on filmdrunk all day. Mark those werds.
I don’t believe in the past. It’s where the commies live.
Indiana Jones and the Case of the lil space alien stuck in a fucking ditch
Indiana Jones and the Spaders of the lost career.
Hey Bex, this is for you, it’s video of that manson concert the other night. It was recorded from just above my head.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ot3jjnOVCZI
I’ll cop to calling the kettle colored, since I sorta repeated Jack’s "visiting nurses who bathe him" one.
Indiana Jones and it Just Took Me Half a Fucking Hour to Remember My New Password.
FUCK MIKE!
nom, thanks, kick ass great show
I have an unbelievable urge to have some sex with a "Mr." right now. Does this make me gay?
Yeah bex, somebody finally got up video of Beatiful People where he gets punched and throws a hissy fit, but the angle is exactly right for you to not see the punch. Some buzzkill’s head is in the way. But, here it is anyways – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6BBS3BKTNgs
Nom: What I really want is the video of him getting his clock cleaned during the encore
Only if the "Mr." is some sort of internets disguise, Nom. Otherwise you’re a flaming spiggot.
See my comment and link @ 21:44 stinky petey. K, thanks sexy.
just saw the vid where manson gets punched in the face pretty awesome
Swearengen, you just gave me a gay if you do gay if you don’t kind of comment there. Pretty ballsy for a noob. I might have to give you a lesson in ‘pwning’ for that. Thin Ice my friend! Thin Ice!
Indiana Jones and Lifetime Television For Women
Just because I’ve only been here a couple days, doesn’t mean I wasn’t here in spirit
for a 33-page marathon.But I will endeavour to watch my step around you in the future, my friend.
Nom: posted my request as you were posting the link – thanks! It was real hard to tell, but it looked more to me like someone was doing the standard rock concert fist pump and accidentally knocked the mic back into his face. Doesn’t surprise me that he reacted by running off stage for a good cry.
Mr.S: I thought you said you had another account before this one? Best start writing down your passwords,
sonyoung ladyuh…. you.Oh and Jesus christ. The thread number on this is my lucky unlucky paranoia number. My fucking job will pay for this travesty…..WITH BLOOD!!
Oh and Jesus christ. The thread number on this is my
luckyunluckyparanoia number. My fucking job will pay for this travesty…..WITH BLOOD!!Fixed it
Arg, repeats…. And here I thought I was SPECIAL and UNIQUE. Sorry for the infernal plagarism.
-A n00b laments.
Indiana Jones and the Hard Earned Pension Plan
Seduction – Don’t sweat it. You were mostly copying me, and everyone else copied me on this thread too. I guess watching everyone you ever loved grow old, sick, and frail is good for something!
Indiana Jones and the I Can’t Tell If That Marilyn Manskin is a Gal or a Feller and Neither Can They
BTW, five nominations for under an hour’s work!
*pats self on back*
Raiders of the Lost Faculties
Indiana Jones and the Uneven Walkway
Yeah Jack! you’ve done well for yourself this evening. Dark skies+dark times+basking in the absurd and sad=fucking funny/guilt for finding pain funny.
Mozel Tov Jack!
Indiana Jones And The BM of Longevity.
Indiana Jones and the pill dividers with days of the week so you don’t mistakenly overdose like Heath Ledger.
I was’nt trying to copy you Jack. You’re just quick.
*cough* to suck a dick *cough*
Indiana Jones and the Emergency Numbers By the Telephone of Just in Case
Peet, writing down my passwords would be leaving a paper trail, and you even CONSIDER calling my a "young lady" again, I’ll bust ya in the chops, cocksucker. Ever see a young lady with a ‘stache like this?
I still love you, though.
Indiana Jones and the goddamnit this equaled a pun war and I’m about to make a criminal threat to my employers cuz I missed it
http://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2008/02/080212134818.htm
Awww… gorillas mate face to face. Like Pauly and Ryan Reynolds. *
*I think it was Pauly that said that, if not, sorry buddy. Grr… fucking a guy without a reach around.
Indiana Jones and the Nursing Home of Peril
Indiana Jones and the Missing Chocolate Box Map.
Indiana Jones and the large candy dish filled with Werther’s Original’s.
Indiana Jones and The Early Bird Special of Surprisingly Good Value
Indiana Jones And The Bingo Halls Of Montezuma
Indiana Jones and The Damn Rap Music
Indiana Jones and the Awake at Dawn and Asleep Before Jeopardy.
Idaho Jones And The Where Am I From Again?
Indiana Jones and the Inescapable Odor of Urine
Indiana Jones And The Fixodent And Forget…Everything
Indiana Jones and his eventual duct-tape suffocating situation…no blood
DNR?
Ever see a young lady with a ‘stache like this?
Funny you should mention that, this one time I had a public defender that was a woman that had a moustache. If you can imagine a short, blobby, strawberry-blonde Super Mario, that was basically her.
But she was like 40 or something. Pretty fucking old.
And, yes, that is shorter and blobbier than Mario already is.
aaaaaaaaaand durst! again WITH BLOOD!!
Fek, that’s disturbing enough to go make me shave. BRB.
Indiana Jones and the Giant Beta-Blocker Sunglasses of Chaos
Indiana Jones and the Tomb of the Guys from the Neighborhood
Indiana Jones and the TBS Golden Girls Marathon
:: examines the horse carefully ::
:: wipes hands on pants, walks away satisfied ::
Indiana Jones and the best pastrami sandwich in Florida.
HAHA Peet! Still whimpering and begging for death…
Indiana Jones and the high wasted slacks.
Indiana Jones and the fading memory of continence.
Indiana Jones and the house that smells like soup.
Indiana Jones and the 3% tip.
Indiana Jones and the Comb-Over of Destiny.
I’m going to bed now.
Dammit Stone, I’m sorry I missed it. You had a good little run there.
Indiana Jones and the Slow Realization that Roger Daltrey Was Right
I can stop any time I want, I swear….
Indiana Jones and those Damn Teenagers
Has that been done, BTW? If you say Jack did it first I’ll call my wife a slut.
Indiana Jones and the marriage to Anna Nicole Smith
Indiana Jones and what’s wrong with this generation of kids
Indiana Jones and the quest for the Sunday paper in thermals with the butt flap open.
Indiana Jones and the Lost Church of the Apostles, Which He Started Attending Every Week Just in Case Jesus Was Real
Indiana Jones and the 10 mile uphill walk in a blizzard for school
Indiana Jones and the Irrational Fear of Having His Social Security Check Switched to Direct Deposit
Indiana Jones and the quest for the socks he think the Nursing Home staff has been stealing from him
Duuuuude, the uphill-both-ways thing has been done to death, but you’re forgiven due to the plethora of posts to go through. So says I.
Nom: Jacktion pretty much ate and digested all the low-hanging fruit, the rest of us are just picking the seeds out of his turds.
Indiana Jones ao the search for Lost Aztec Medallion…
….with a metal detector.
Indiana Jones and the pointless, annoying phonecalls he makes to his offspring
Indiana Jones and the Expired Handicapped Parking Permit of Doom
I have hit at least one or two ones that weren’t done yet, haven’t I?
BTW, my sisters and I have been caring for our grandmother for over 20 years, so I’ve got a pretty deep well of experience to draw from here.
Indiana Jones and the request for the senior discount.
Indiana Jones and his 5 hours of sitting in your store after buying 1 cup of coffee
Indiana Jones and his problem with securing auto insurance
Indiana Jones and his closet full of windbreakers
Indiana Jones and the smell of Gold Bond Medicated Powder.
Indiana Jones and his elderly wife’s matching outfit
Indiana Jones and the bottle of iodine.
Indiana Jones and the Past Parade, that he will detail
Indiana Jones and the creeped out crying toddler
Indiana Jones and the easy to use Jitterbug cell phone.
Sorry folks, but thats all for me til tomorrow maybe around 6-11 CST.
Indiana Jones and My Money that I paid into Social Security
Indiana Jones and the nodding off during “Unsolved Mysteries” on Lifetime.
Done and done.
Indiana Jones and watching the telenovela, recording it, and watching it tomorrow again before the current episode airs
Amigas y Rivales, Bex? The fucking end of days can’t pull my Nana away from her Novelas.
hahahahahahaha i know what you mean, over here it was the Mexican remake of betty la fea, even though they had already seen the original columbian betty la fea, they watched it, taped it, watched it again, and complained the whole fucking time that it wasnt as good as the original one
Indiana Jones and the Tomb of the
Guys from the NeighborhoodIndiana JonesFIXED!
I guess that should have been:
Indiana Jones and the Tomb of
the Guys from the NeighborhoodIndiana JonesFIXED!
Como Chingas
no mames como ha puesto chingaderas el jacktion!
Indiana Jones and the joke that went on for far too long.
Oh no, they are speaking in code. I knew I shouldve taken spanish in highschool
Indiana Jones and the magical store full of ugly sweaters and socks to give to his grandkids on christmas
The good thing about novelas: the girls are hot as shit.
The bad thing: the little kids talking. I’ll give one of them a nice putaso to the throat.
Indiana Jones and the choclate star fish and the hot dog flavored water.
Dursty Thursday
oh i know theres this chick called ivonne montero http://www.network54.com/Forum/405256/ hot as fuck, shes naked in a couple of movies http://tinyurl.com/yolyko
and yeah nothing worse than a sassy latino kid if a putaso doesn’t work, try a vergazo,
it’s always better
Indiana Jones and the Stepladder of Riskiness
Indiana Jones Sticks His Dick in the Jar of Icy Hot at Easter Dinner
Indiana Jones and the Pigeons of Hungriness
Indiana Jones and the Prunes of Regularity
Indiana Jones and the Testicles of Dust
Indiana Jones and the Menacing Parking Space of Trepidation
Indiana Jones and the Nostril Hair Booger Moustache
Indiana Jones and the stories he’ll tell you when you’re not there
The thieving of Priceless Artifacts by the kidnapper Indiana Jones
Indiana Jones and the Wrinkly FIST
Indiana Jones And The Time We Beat Those God-Damned Krauts
Holy Joseph and Christ! You kids were busy while I was fucking your moms last night!!!
Was that you? I was wondering whose beard was tickling the back of my neck last night.