After Afghanistan banned The Kite Runner and the studio delayed production while the stars basically ran for their lives because of a fictional rape scene, I can’t imagine the Muslims are gonna be thrilled about this latest news.
First Run Features has acquired U.S. theatrical and DVD rights to "A Jihad for Love," the first doc to explore the lives of gay Muslims.
"Jihad," which preemed at the Toronto fest and is set to unspool in the Panorama section at Berlin, was filmed on many continents, often in secret, because many local governments would not sanction the filming. [Variety]
I know the gays are supposed to be all flamboyant and stuff, but I’m pretty sure if I was a muslim and a gay I’d be walking around with a burqa on, talking in a high-pitched voice all day. Getting my dome chopped off in the town square wouldn’t be my idea of “giving head”, you know what I’m saying? Ha ch-cha-cha-cha! *sad trombone sounds*
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Awww yeah baby . . . that’s what I needed. . . lemme get some up offa you on credick!
Whoa! There is a muslim dating site ad on my sidebar! Where’d that come from? Do they pay for their advertising in Afghanis Lance, cuz I heard you need a suitcase of those to buy a
beerhookerdead hooker. . . . . cow.Merciful Allah in his infinite wisdom does not allow alcohol, or whores. Whore killing is still up for debate.
I always knew muslims smoked virginia slims.
I thought Muslims worshipped cows!
Why would a muslimchoose to be gay? Makes no sense.
All that burka thing she is wearing would do is make sure my love only got on her face.
I thought it was the
other ragheadsIndians that worshipped cows Jack.Ah – Muslim Dating AND a Muslim Marriage site, just in case you want to skip all that costly courting crap and get straight to the good stuff.
what about western society DON’T the muslim’s hate?
durka durka mohammed jihad
I thought Muslim courting was giving her dad a goat? Did I over generalize a grossly misrepresented stereotype again there? Ok, I’m cool with that.
hahahahahahha! jack is a wet pussy!
I might convert to Islam just so I can go to singlemuslim.com
Don’t be spamming us with your religion of love and peace over here Jack! Take that shit Over There where it belongs.
I would totally fuck that chick in that add. She’s mustard.
I’m a pagan, and it’s just so hard to find a good pagan dating site!
what about western society DON’T the muslim’s hate?
The money we pay them to hate us, err, I mean for their oil.
i really hope the gay muslims can breakdance fight their way outta’ this one!
I’m a pagan
People against goodness and normalcy? Me too!!!
aaaaand…durst?
Hey, anybody else wondering what Lance might have planned for the 1000th post on FD? I know you can’t predict the movie news (unlike Over There where it’s a sure bet Britney will do something retarded, the goat will be a slut, and Tom Cruise will be a phreaq). But still, it’s gotta be something special don’cha think? Anybody wanna offer suggestions?
You know how I know you’re a gay Muslim? Because you shave your pubes for you boyfriend instead of in accordance with the Sunnah of the Prophet Muhammed
Nom, is that Hal? Oh shit, that’s my login icon on my home machine! It’s like we’re in each other’s head. Dude, get outta my spank bank!
There is much debate because in older Koranic texts it says martyrs will receive 72 goats in paradise. Great richest indeed for 7th century nomadic beduins. Then later it is 72 virgins. So, in all likelyhood these dumb fucks are blowing themselves up for a shot at fucking 72 goats for all eternity in their imaginary paradise.
My nomination is…….the 1000 most annoying comments by nominus.
Yeah, erswi, it is. I think this image is why avatars were made.
You know how I know you’re a gay Muslim?
There’s three years worth of dried jizz in your beard.
Only the sluttiest muslims blow themselves up. Only so they can be gang-banged by 72 virgin muslim men in the afterlife.
we should be so lucky to live in a society that hates gays so much- i’m so sick of walking around town, sucking the sunny-D, and then being handed trophy after trophy for my efforts.
can’t a filmdrunkard get a break!?!
Dat’s what I’m talkin bout! Dude, really. Get outta my spank bank. You can take the pics of Eib and Lala with you if you really need ‘em.
Where are all the ladies at today anyway? Saw Al and BK earlier, but it’s been a sausage fest otherwise.
We should just air drop massive amounts of porn and fifis all over these dudes. It’s hard to get up the gumption to blow yourself up after furiously masturbating for 30 straight hours.
Only the sluttiest female muslims blow themselves up. Only so they can be gang-banged by 72 virgin muslim men in the afterlife.
Fixed. Quitcher bitchin.
Chodin, hand me the purple stuff.
In honor of my new avatar, I think I’ll watch "Cool as Ice" tonight. To top it off I’ll have Mrs. JHC hairpray her bangs straight up in the air, throw on some acid washed jeans, rolled tight around her ankles, and ask her if she wants to go out with me. She’ll say "get the fuck out of here", and I’ll end up beating off to a Paula Abdul video. It’ll be just like high school all over again.
i want to be gay and live in AFGANFNDIFNSIDERERERSTANNNN!!!!!!
You know how I know you’re a gay Muslim? Because your anti-air rocket launcher has a rainbow sticker on the shaft.
You know your a gay Muslim when you go around sniffing your left hand all day.
You know how I know you’re a gay Muslim?
There’s a bottle of anal lube sticking out of your turban.
I know you are gay because you used the word ‘shaft’. And you wear purple. I don’t know if you’re muslim yet though.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you simply musssst match your prayer rug to the rest of your accessories. (turban/AK-74/garder socks)
We have always had the same taste in avatars though.
now THAT sounds like a plan, jesus. i might enlighten myself similarly this evening.
You know how I know you’re a gay Muslim?
Whenever your praying to the east, there’s always a well hung naked man to your west.
“A Jihad for Love”…if i were a sexy radio DJ, this would be track i end my nights with.
chodin: “and now for all you gay muslims out there- let the slow sounds of this tune suck your desert-dick dry…enjoy, all you camel fuckers, and i’ll see you all tomorrow on BOOSH FM”
You know how I know you’re a gay Muslim? Because you figured, well, I’ve already got the HIV, I might as well blow myself up in a crowded town square and take out a few infidels with me.
BAM! 2 stereotypes in one not-so-clever post. Suck on that.
^you’re
FUCK!
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you have a Burkha hidden under the bed with a button flap on the ass.
Sand in the pussy, much?
You know how I know Nominus is gay? B/c he’s gay! Yeah! Take that!
You know you’re a gay Muslim because when somebody said blow-up the square, you went down on Glenn.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you wear body glitter to a suicide bombing.
you know you’re a gay muslim when you’re still obsessing about that ‘sssilly-head’ Raj who went to his suicide bombing in DRAAAG lassst week and wore YOUR button-flap-assed burkha, that uppity QUEEN!
You know how I know you’re a gay Muslim? Because your IED’s are made from used dildos.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when your nickname is "ScrewHisDry Bum"
Wearing purple. WTF is that shit? What, you mixed red and blue together? Quit mixing our colors, you ..you…purple purpler. Zing!
you know how i know you’re a gay muslim?
cause last week when you ran into that busy market and tore your shirt open to reveal a bunch of sticks of dynamite- you actually had accidently strapped a belt of dildos to your chest.
fag.
BOOSH!!!!!
Whassamatta Nommy? Cock, block jayhawks let you down? It’s OK. You’ll get over it. Same as you got over being a gay Muslim. With the help of Allah and Raghreb the camel salesman. Go ahead, take it for a test drive.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you run home crying from the big Jew burning because Mohammed is wearing the same towel on his head as you.
Damn Jack! Nice one!
You know you’re a gay Muslim when your when you favorite film is Osama Bin Loggin.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when your boyfriend asks if you’re really gonna wear that turban with those sandals.
cock block jayhawk GO KU! i’ll never be the same again…thanks erswi
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you meet the woman that your parents arranged for you to marry, and you’re actually happy that she looks like a man!
Glad to help another architect out when I can. Anytime bne.
cock block jayhawk GO KU!
Actually, thats fucking brilliant!
You know how I know you’re a gay muslim?
You got a strap-on between your camel’s humps.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you read Details magazine in Arabic.
Crappy that was beautiful. It has been nominated, I assure you.
You know how I know you’re a gay muslim?
Your camel spits, you swallow.
Lance, I’m going to recommend bumping this thread off of the top of the page.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you offer to let your boyfriend "hide" his "explosives" in your "caves of afghanistan"
you know you’re a gay muslim when:
you can’t watch “the kite runner” for fear that you’ll have to feast on the closest cock to you.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you fuck a man’s ass, but it’s not to make him humble.
When is the last time we had a pun war? God, it’s like we’re growing apart. *sniffle*
Teehehe-growing apart.
you know you’re a gay muslim when ‘tunnel duty’ not only still makes you giggle, but you’re on your way to sign up for it RIGHT NOW!
you know you’re a gay muslim when:
the whole gang shows up and wants you to come kill some infidels with them, and you accidenlty say, “no thanks, i’d rather stay home and fuck a butt – i mean…ALALALALALALA”.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when your shoulder mounted rocket launcher is just full of confetti.
you know you’re a gay muslim when:
you say you’re a gay muslim.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you wear Crocs instead of sandals.
you know you’re a gay muslim when:
you pay top-dollar to smuggle in ‘teen vogue’.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you fuck a man’s ass, but it’s not to make him humble. Normaly i skip these posts, Mostly because i’m afraid it’ll come back to me Mark Furman(sp) style but damn if that wasn’t funny. Nice Jack.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you keep spinning around to see if your robes make your ass look fat.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you hijack a flight to New York to go see Rent.
you know you’re a gay muslim:
when everyone’s talking about jihads, and all you really want to do is chat about last night’s episode of “the hills”.
You know how I know you’re a gay muslim?
You have a "penis-gripped" AK-47.
You are a gay muslim if you’ve never banged bryce’s grandma, and also follow the teachings of muhammad.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you’re upset that the al jazeera network doesn’t show Will & Grace.
"You are a gay muslim if you’ve never banged bryce’s grandma, and also follow the teachings of muhammad."
FUCK!
You know how I know you’re a gay muslim?
You consider your asshole a martyr, after you took that guy home last Saturday night.
Thank God I’ve never followed the teaching of Mohammed. Allah be merciful. Whoops.
you know you’re a gay muslim when:
to set off your bomb, you cartwheel into the busy market.
You know you’re a gay muslim if you have to clock out with your cock out then go pick up the kid from school. Empty Office Chair :(
If you’ve got 12 camels in front of your hut, and one in your ass, you might be a gay Muslim
Later Nom. Stay gay, Muslim and proud.
You know how I know you’re a gay muslim?
You tried to stone someone to death, but you couldn’t because you throw like a girl.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you’re interested in Scientology.
you know you’re a gay muslim:
if you ride piggyback into battle.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you can’t find a match on singlemuslim.com
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you think Rag Head is a type of hair product.
you know you’re a gay muslim:
if you buy your camel sweaters.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you bleach your asshole "for the glory and praise of Allah."
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you make it all the way through "2Arabs1Falafel".
I KNEW THIS SITE WAS FULL OF GAY TERRORISTS!!!!!!!!! You people thought I was JOKING! Fuck!
You know you’re a gay Muslim when all of your internet downloads are A2M. Ass 2 Muslim.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you say infedel you mean in Fedel.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you see a minarette and get a boner.
You know how I know you’re a gay muslim?
You give your boyfriend a "Sandy Trombone".
You know you’re a gay Muslim when Ashton Kutcher makes you reconsider your hatred of Jews.
Ok, come on – this timing is a little odd, right? I introduce an immigrant/muslim/terrorist/homosexual hating character and Lance delivers this gem? Praise Allah!
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you ask your Imam to declare a Fatwah against cock stuble.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you name your camel "Dorothy".
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you chant "Death to Bush!" but you’re really talking about pussy.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you cry during the burning of an American flag because it’s such a waste of fabric.
You know you’re gay if you read GQ.
…wait…
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you subscribe to Better Caves and Gardens.
Hey! I went there with Details!
Crapthief!
…fuckin work…
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you read GQ Saudi Arabia.
fixed?
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you eat bacon just because the butcher is cute.
If you can’t decide to use a sandy sienna or turkish taupe vest to strap your explosives to, you might be a gay Muslim.
You know you’re a gay muslim if you suck Akmed the butcher’s cock, just b/c he’s cute.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you bring crystals to a stoning.
You know how I know you’re a gay muslim?
When you see Abdul bend over and your camel toe turns into a camel tail.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when your name is John Bakir.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when your executioner gets a feature in Taleban Vogue
This one is gonna get a big fat wa on me fo sho.
You know how I know you’re a gay Muslim? You jerk off to the Qu’ran.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you get arrested because you want to get thrown into a Turkish prison.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you put a condom on your scimitar.
I don’t even get it.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you get down on your hands and knees to face Mecca and your best bearded friend joins you. Y’know, with his circumcised cock.
You know you’re a gay Muslim if your bitch of a roomate used all your god damned product and didn’t replace it or even leave a note – HOW RUDE!
You know you’re a gay Muslim when the only song you can play on the sitar is "It’s Raining Men".
You know you’re a gey Muslim b/c when you were in Abu Gharib you liked it.
Ohhhh, I hope we do the Manamid tonight!
"It’s Raining Men". after Allah compelled me to blow those infidels to kingdom come.
Hey Jacktion, how about
Because after the suicide bomber blew up you got excited because it was "Raining Men."
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you always vacation in Qatar.
Hmmm, me and the Limey are on the same brain wave.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you invite men over to study the teachings of your "Ayat-Hole-Ah"
You know you’re a gay Muslim if under your turbin you have a french weave.
That’s Fucking Limey, Artist formally known as Cb.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you tell your women friends to "Go work-a that burka!"
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you drive a Miata… and you’re Muslim.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you style your beard in a faux-hawk.
You know you’re a gay Muslim if the only American you refuse to hate is Tim Gunn.
I’m out fuckers. Drunk on and keep hatin on them gay muslims.
You know how I know you’re a gay muslim?
You get dingleberries in your beard.
You know you’re the Muslim Dude if your magic carpet really ties the room together.
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you know how to do a Dirty Akmed.
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you get pissed at your boyfriend Achmal because he pulled out and shot a jihad on your back.
you know you’re a gay muslim:
when you catch yourself daydreaming that alah looks like the sweaty sax guy from ‘lost boys’.
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you think RPG means Really Proud Gay.
Shit! That lame crap starts the page?
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you allow your local AK-47 repairman to lay the Arabian Goggles on you.
You know how I know you’re a gay muslim?
You got gangbanged by Ali Baba and his 40 thieves.
…if you’ve had a rainbow embroidered onto your camel’s ass.
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you chieftain told you to blow up a hummer and you burned your lips on the exhaust pipe.
You know you’re a gay Muslim if your tent has track lighting.
Or if you gave your chiefton a Hummer and he don’t drive! OHHHH!
you know your gay if you’ve been posting in the midst of a sausage fest for 156 comments
BOOSH!!!
or more
You know you’re a gay Muslim when you learn Scheherazade’s one thousand and one nights are not actually knights. "Ooh, come and defile me you Crusaders."
You know you’re a gay Muslim if you find yourself BURNING IN HELL with the rest of the unclean.
You know you’re a gay Muslim if all your chick friends are rag fag hags.
Hey Dick, is that god riding a wraith from halo?
I don’t know what you’re talking about – but if the guy playing that acoustic guitar in your picture is an immigrant, or a gay Muslim, or has an audience of gay immigrant Muslims, he’s in for a hot time in the old town, if you know what I mean.
Hey Eib. Nice way to pop in a durst the thread, I thinik i’m pumping a dry hole anyway. (selfBoosh!!) Can’t help it that we’re spinning comedy golod over here and all the fems are gone.
Colin Hays? Yeah, he’s an immigrant, but he’ll give you a vegimite sandwich.
Some of the fems have been chuckling quietly in the back row for quite a while now, I’ll have you know.
You know you’re a gay Muslim if your favourite movie is about a forbidden and secretive relationship between two goat herders and their lives over the years. Certificate R. Women not permitted.
You know your a gay Muslim if you think Bagdad is when you tea bag your dom partner.
you know you’re a gay muslim, if you’ve actually read and seen “the kite runner”.
you know you’re a gay muslim if you use your night vision goggles to watch your buddies while they sleep.
you know you’re a gay muslim if you put lip stick on your charming snake.
Where are all the ladies at today anyway? Saw Al and BK earlier, but it’s been a sausage fest otherwise.
We’re out braiding our hair with gay Muslims.
you know you’re a gay muslim if you while your buddy is planting a bomb, you leapfrog him.
You know you’re a gay Muslim if your coming out party was ruined when a camel knocked over the table with the oil derrick chocolate fountain and the cake shaped like A BIG FUCKING DICK!!!
You know you’re a gay muslim if you despise all western decadent music with the exception of Man to Man meets Man Parish’s Male Stripper. That’s one track you really let your beard down to.
You know you’re a gay Muslim if You believe in life after love.
I know Al, I’ve been lurking today too. Braiding BKs hair and all.
You knwo you’re a gay Muslim if you celebrate Ram-a-Dan.
Like a gay Muslim suicide bomber’s cleric ten minutes before detonation, i’m outta here.
Eib – I had to braid my own hair :(
i m sorry, lets have a sleep over!
we can have lingerie pillow fights and talk about boys. maybe we can watch sex and the city!
And we can compare breastseses while we make a mess with chocolate fondu.
ooh, my favorite!
can we practice making out?
Can I practice watching Eib? I won’t be too creepy, I promise.
You know you’re a lez Muslim when you munch the rug you really munch a rug.
You know you’re a lez Muslim when you play softball …and you’re Muslim.
You know you’re a lez Muslim when you wear a Lilith Faire t-shirt under your burkha.
You know you’re a lez Muslim if… aw fuck it, I’m going home.
you know your a lez muslim if when you get down on your hands and knees near a rug, its not to pray
You know youre a lez Muslim if you hang your strap-on bomb belt next to your strap-on dildo
Shit, was that one already dont for the gay Muslims? I can’t keep them all straight.
done*
DAMMIT
I love how there is now the distinction between "gay" and "lesbian" Muslims.
Also: The second rule of Tickle Club is YOU DO NOT TALK ABOUT TICKLE CLUB. P.S. Your assignment this week is to start a pillow fight and then lose.
Was the "I can’t keep them all straight" part of my comment too subtle, or just not funny? Anyone? Anyone?
If Eib was a blackboard, I would chalk her.
If she were Columbo, would you Peter Fek’lhr?
Fuck, did I just admit to watching an episode of American Idol?
You know you’re a lesbian Muslim when "flying carpets" is your favorite sexual position.
If a Muslim brother and sister have sex, will the baby be jiharded?
Jihahden the fuck up.
Oooh yeah, keep talking dirty Al. You’re getting me jihard!
Best Muslim pick-up lines:
pantsrobe, I’m just happy to see you!Theres not many puns for jihad is there. It’s pretty jihard. Screw you Jack!
Fuck you, Nom! Learn to use a question mark!
I gave you a jihardon?
Yeah, you’re getiing me all jihot and bothered.
C"mon, Al! Jiholla atcha boy!
Jihardyhar. Har.
I wrote "Jacktion and Al" in jihearts all over my notebook.
I’m jihardly buying THAT, Jaction!, but I’ll meet you after school under the bleachers if you want, anyway…
Yes!
::to his friends::
I am gonna jihollow that girl out!
FUCKK I’m totally sorry, I needed that "k" from your name to emphasize my brilliant swearwordology.
I’m gonna jihave you for dinner, baby.
I didn’t mention that you forgot the "k" in my name because I didn’t want to be too jiharsh with you.
Although, I already jihad dinner. You can be dessert.
Mmmm… dessert. There’s always room for jihello!
Jack, you’re such a loveable jiherk.
geez i think you two are going to make me jipuke
You know, my comment actually made me go out into the kitchen and get some jello.
So I don’t know about the "lovable" part, but I’ll agree with the other half.
Oh, and my favorite Muslim sci-fi character is JiHan Solo.
Well, when I say "loveable" what I mean is "online when I am and there’s no one else here to talk to". So don’t go jihumping to conclusions.
(Hehehe, I said jihumping…)
Oh sorry STAnky, I didn’t see you there. Jihust lurking around, are you?
You guys are jih-larious.
jihall is forgiven, Al, you know I can’t stay mad at you
If it’s any consolation, I didn’t notice Nom up there til just now, either. Must be the jihoint I smoked earlier.
I could really go for some JiHaagen Dazs ice cream.
Just out of curiousity, how come this place is dominated by guys during the day, but the ladies only come out at night? Surely the men aren’t the only ones with jihobs… I know jihacktion said hes unemployed
Now you’re getting all friendly with StAnky, Al? Fine, I’ll just spend a quiet evening alone with my Jihurgen’s hand lotion.
I’m not trying to move on on anyone’s territory, Jihack!.
StAnky, I’m not unemployed, I’m unemployable.
Big difference.
Don’t get all jihuvenile on me now, Jack. STAnky and I are jihust friends. Right, lover?
Indeed Jihal… Indeed
Maybe I’ll have some Ben & Jiherry’s instead.
You two have been found guilty by a jihury of your peers.
Curses… it would appear the jihig is up
Jihadios!
Al, I know I should forgive you, but I’m so angry! What Would Jihesus Do?
Can we talk about this over a cup of jihava?
I’m a reasonable guy. I’m not all possesive like Kathy Bates in Misery.
I won’t jihobble you just because you want to leave.
H E double jihockeysticks. I am going to have to stick around to see where this goes.
I don’t do well with confrontation Jack, loser of jihrock, paper, scissors backs down?
I’m trying to offer the proverbial jiholive branch
Boy, if I jihad a dollar for every time I heard that.
Oh My Allah. Am I talking to myself over here? I need more jihardonnay…
Old MacDonald jihad a farm…
Could I interest you instead Chino in a Jihack and Coke?
I prefer Jihim Beam and water. But thanks!
JWiaDH: Jihi Jihi Jo?
Knowing is half the battle!
My Uncle Jihed has 60 million dollars in Mr. Drysdale’s bank.
Jiholy fuck, I locked myself out of my damn apartment for 1/2 hour. Thanks alot for waiting for me, guys.
Gay muslims? If you ask me Allah those guys are fags.
I’m from Ji-eattle.
Columbus here, Jih-no
Al, to be jihonest with you, you should be more responsible.
StAnky: I was gonna use the Jih-no later. Thanks a lot.
Vancouver here, but with this subzero weather, I’m up for a jihange of venue. I’m sure you feel my pain, Chino.
Bet you jihad a hard time getting in your apartment.
Irresponsibility is just one more jiharacter flaw I like to flaunt, like my lack of morals and disregard for those I deem intellectually beneath me.
you can still use it, Jih-no… look at JWiaDH… He’s used ji-had 3 times now.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that
I’m in L.A. where temperatures jihave dipped into the 60′s. Better bring a jihacket.
Al and I need our ji-parkas. I know that doesn’t really work, but I think you get my point.
Here in Ohio, the weather isnt too bad, but people lose all ability to drive without their jiheads up their asses if it starts flurrying.
Abdul the Camel Guy is pissed he missed the homo muslim on muslim homo action today.
Rafael Nadal is grunting away on my TV right now. Gotta go "double click the mouse" if you know what I mean. And I know you do. See you in about 10 minutes. I have a lot of stamina.
On the rare occasion it snows in Vancouver, you take your jihances just walking outdoors, what with all the morons in 4X4s and Hummers who think their penile-compensators make them immune to black ice.
Black ice? Iz dat ice from da streetz?
And, I’m back. Now I need a ji-hot pocket.
I thought you just got done playin with your ji-hot pocket, Jih-no?
True dat. Maybe I need some jih-ambalaya.
This "jihad" thing set off a whole jihain reaction of food references, didn’t it?
How’d you get backi into your apartment, Al? Help from a friendly jihanitor?
I think Jihacktion! got out just in time, I’m starting to scrape the bottom of the barrel
Speak of the devil, STAnky, and lo, he appears. This is a great literary jihallenge for you. Expand your lexicon and all that jihazz.
I’m starting to scrape the bottom of the barrel
Starting? Ok, sure. Whatever you say.
I’d never make it as a jih-ournalist, Al.
Jack – I pushed buttons until some kindly old jihentleman took pity on me and my frozen ass and buzzed me in.
Any of you jih-okers want a jih-alapeno popper??
True story: I just (jihust?) went to the supermarket and picked up some peanut butter, among many other things. I got home and decided that I wanted to have a sandwich, only to discover that I was out of jihelly.
Dude, that was brilliant. I bow down to you. Not even gonna sully it with a "ji" interjihection.
(may I interrupt this program by informing you all it was the "jih-alapeno" I was giving props to – no dis to you, Jihack, but jihalapeno is way funnier than jihelly).
I kinda figured, Al.
But the point of my story wasn’t the ji-whatever reference. It was a true story. Now I’m hungry and sad. :(
Outside of the ji-game, that does suck Jack, I do shit like that all the time. Ever buy cereal and get home and realize there’s no milk?
Al, you’re my gal. Wanna get together for a tickle fight? I could bust out my Epilady and we could groom ourselves and talk about boys.
Ever go to the store and come back to find you have NO KEYS TO GET BACK IN? I win, fuckers. Tonight, at least. For biggest ‘tard award.
I could go back to the store, but how sad is your life when you run to the supermarket just to pick up jelly at 1AM?
When I was a snot nosed punk in high school, Al, I lost my keys at an amusement park about an hour from home. That sucked.
I prefer wax parties, Chino. Then we can pluck each others’ eyebrows and play nekkid Twister. It’s a good way to stay in shape, you know.
One morning I dropped my keys down that tiny space between the elevator door and the floor – right down the elevator shaft. Most impressive reason to be 5 hours late for work EVER.
How about nekkid Jih-enga? There is really no need to lose the clothes, but what the hell!
Nekkid "anything" just makes it better, I think. Nekkid backgammon, nekkid Monopoly, nekkid Truth or Dare… although that takes a lot of the "dare" part out of the equation.
StAnky, was that King’s Island?
Or was it Cedar Point?
I’m guessing it was King’s Island.
As for the naked games, am I the only one who’s played strip Chutes and Ladders?
Jih-olly g’night everyone, Hopefully I’ll see you tomorrow after I leave my j-hobby ji-hob.
That would be King’s Island, Jack… I’m from just north of Dayton, so I used to get a season pass every summer. Not as good of a time as Cedar Point, but a good time nonetheless
You’re from Columbus, right? My best friend lives in Cincy.
I live in Columbus now, I’m still in school. I like Cincy, it gets a bad rap nationally, but it’s a pretty decent town.
Is Columbus where Family Ties was set?
Oh c’mON, does Jacktion!’s best friend know STAnky? The suspense is killing me…
No, they’re not that close. Unless StAnky happens to be in a band, or work at a club, it’s highly unlikely.
I didn’t remember that, Jack, but yes, it was set in Columbus… and for Al’s sake, I don’t know many people in Cincy. I’m sure I’ve never met your friend.
Is your friend in a local band, or work at a local club? I’m still sure I don’t know him, but now I’m curious.
Yeah, he’s been in a couple of bands in Cincy. He’s a guitarist. We used to be in a band together before he headed to Ohio.
Guitarists are hott. But drummers are the BOMB.
I’ve heard that big dorky singers are the sexiest, though.
Depends on degree of dorkiness. And how *big*.
I’ll be the judge of that.
Damn, I had to go to my niece’s first confession and missed all the ji-tardery. And somebody even beat me to jih-oker? Damn it!
What the hell did you guys do? God, get a life. Like Me!
I’ve heard that big dorky singers are the sexiest, though.Um, who are ya talking about??
Me, Chino.