As we learned from her courageous stand against Knocked Up and subsequent empowering star turn in 27 Dresses, Katherine Heigl is fast becoming a role model for mormon feminists everywhere.

Great anticipation always accompanies news of her projects, the world wondering what new heights the media’s portrayal of the fairer perfectly equal sex can reach.  This time around, her she-chariot of fem-justice will be The Ugly Truth, opposite The 300‘s Gerard Butler, from the writing/directing team behind Legally Blonde. 

Story centers on a romantically challenged morning show producer (Heigl) who is reluctantly embroiled by her chauvinistic correspondent (Butler) in a series of outrageous tests to prove his theories on relationships and help her find love. [Variety] 

Wow, sounds like How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days meets every romantic comedy ever written.  But I’m sure this will be great.  Katherine Heigl is a true American hero – she’s like the white Rosa Parks.  But then again, she’s not fighting for the rights of white people – so I guess she’s more like, uh, the female Rosa Parks. (Crap, I’m going to get hate mail for that, aren’t I.) 

Yahoo has this new featurette for the upcoming Will Ferrell movie, Semi-Pro. 

It’s got cameos from a bunch of basketball guys of whom I’ve never heard, and a mega creepy spot from Mark Cuban.

He’s only onscreen for 20 seconds or so but still manages to softify my wang, probably for weeks.  Watching him is like watching your dad give an enthusiastic, thorough, detailed position-by-position analysis of boning your mom.  It’s the kind of thing I always hated when I was growing up.

Producers Michael Bay, Brad Fuller, and Andrew Form are in talks to re-launch the Nightmare on Elm Street movie series, focusing on Freddy Krueger’s backstory.

The film centered on Krueger, a serial child killer murdered by angry parents, who returns with a burned face and a razor glove to terrorize teens in their dreams. [HollywoodReporter]

Brad Fuller and Andrew Form also produced the 2003 remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, the 2005 remake of The Amityville Horror, 2006’s The Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning, the 2007 remake of The Hitcher, and will be producing 2009 remakes of Friday the 13th and The Birds. 

It’s nice to see original minds like these running things.

Speaking of remakes, what ever happened to those candies that looked like cigarettes and tasted like bazooka joe, that you could blow on and powdered sugar would puff out like smoke?  I think they should bring those back.  I don’t want my kids to be teetotalling pussies.

[Picture Credit: failblog.wordpress.com] 

I think FilmDrunk just found its official movie reviewer.  Some of what he had to say about Rambo:

Overall, it just wasn’t a bunch of boring back and forth crap.  No talking. It was just straightforward action.  Which I liked.  Some people may think Sylvester Stallone is too old for the part, but I think he did a pretty good job.

A little more about our reviewer from his YouTube profile:

Name: Sexman
Age: 54
A guy who loves to make videos and have a good time.
Country: Canada
Occupation: Making Videos
Companies: Gang Bang Prodouctions
Interests and Hobbies: Making Videos playing video games watching tv writing.
Movies and Shows: Movies: Super Bad Simpsons AVP-r. Shows: South Park Family Guy Simpsons.

This kid is the real-life McLovin.  Sexman, we salute you. 

Commenter ‘I Will Do Questionable Things To Your Mother’ writes, "Can you even imagine how hard this dude parties?"    

That’s right, folks, question marks in the headline can mean only one thing: it’s time to prognosticate! Will Morgan Freeman run for President? Would this monkey let me squeeze her tits for a banana?  No one can say for sure, and that means we’re free to speculate wildly! Yee ha!

Today’s question mark is based on what actor Christopher Plummer, who’d been working on Imaginarium of Dr. Parnassus with Terry Gilliam and Heath Ledger, told People magazine. 

"Terry’s throwing himself into the job of trying to salvage the picture," …Despite earlier reports that the director might shelve the $30 million production, Gilliam, whom Plummer describes as "terribly saddened" by Ledger’s death is "trying to work out at this moment how to continue on. Fortunately, because the film deals with magic, there is a way, perhaps, of turning Heath into other people and then, using stills and I think they call it CGI…

"Terry was a very good friend [of Heath's]," adds Plummer. "He very wants to go on with the movie, and I can very much understand why. Because he wants to dedicate it to Heath, of course." 

I’m not sure what’s sadder, Heath Ledger dying young, Terry Gilliam facing another production disaster, or an aging actor trying to explain computerized special effects.  "So apparently they take a computer, and they put a picture of the deceased on it, burn some incense, and cover the whole thing in the blood of a suckling pig, and then hope that their techmo-deity has been appeased.  And if I’m not mistaken, that’s how Transformers was made."

I’m a big Gilliam fan, but motion-capture’s pretty creepy even when it doesn’t have a dead guy’s face grafted onto it.  A zombie joke would probably be in poor taste here, so you’ll have to fill in the blanks yourselves.