The Conan the Barbarian remake is apparently still a go, with Lionsgate acquiring distribution rights this week.
Pic is earmarked to begin production later this year, but the start date will depend on the resolution of the writers strike. Nu Image/Millennium chief Avi Lerner confirmed that he is in discussions to make a WGA deal akin to those brokered with United Artists and the Weinstein Co. Such a pact would speed up the process. [Variety]
The new film will reportedly be more faithful to the original Richard E. Howard creation than the Schwarzenegger flicks. A snip:
Hither came Conan, the Cimmerian, black-haired, sullen-eyed, sword in hand, a thief, a reaver, a slayer, with gigantic melancholies and gigantic mirth, to tread the jeweled thrones of the Earth under his sandalled feet.
…Yeah, that sounds a little gay. Better have him get drunk and punch a camel again. You heard it here kids, there’s really nothing like animal abuse for proving your heterosexuality.
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If the Conan remake sucks, The mighty Fek’lhr WILL go destroy Hollywood.
You heard it here kids, there’s really nothing like animal abuse for proving your heterosexuality.
Mongo taught me that.
Holly is a transvestite, isn’t she fek?
The Mighty Fek’lhr cannot envision how these movies can be more "book authentic" and not be rated at LEAST NC-17. Have any of you forshak lapping yIntaghs ever read any of those books? The Mighty One swears there is a chapter where Conan deflowers three virgins in the muck of a dead gigantic slug! WITH HIS TONGUE!
Nom, keep dat shit on the DL.
strangely, i, too, have ‘gigantic melancholies’. but ’round these parts they don’t call them that…
“…there’s really nothing like animal abuse for proving your heterosexuality.”
oh yeah lance? well what about cybering with some dude named Al for two days, and then finding out it’s a girl…so betrayed.
*chodin hops back into the shower and continues to scrub his balls violetly*
I return.
…………….can you hear me…………….
You heard it here kids, there’s really nothing like animal abuse for proving your heterosexuality.
that’s why I step on worms when it rains. I have the right of way invertebrates. *squish* Muwahahahaha!
read you 5 by 5, craptastic.
*chodin hops back into the shower and continues to scrub his balls violetly*
Jacktion, proposing to new chicks? you are dead to me
I camel punched this chick because I caught her going through my wallet. I told her to get out her twenty, she earned it, but I didn’t say SHIT about looking at my wallet pics and telling me how cute my kids are!
fek: in the future, everybody scrubs their balls violetly…they look so nice and purple afterwards.
No, I didn’t propose. I know she’s just using me to get to the cadaver. Speaking of which, I’ve gotta go. All my dad’s shit isn’t going throw itself out.
jacktion! – i salute you.
you’re the shit.
(am i trying to fuck you-yes)
don’t forget the springy fragrance, chod!
Does rubbing your ball violetly take blue balls away?
Chod-The mighty Fek’lhr isn’t sure about that…He might have to bank the ol’ Grethor off the suns gravitational field, go forward in time and see if that is true!
…
… …
PEW PEW PEW! *cool sci fi sound effects*
Dor sho gha! He was right!
*starts to scrub his balls violetly*
Jaction!, I think it’s those sexy bedroom eyes you’re looking at me with that’s doin’ it for me, and you just leave my necrophiliac tendancies out of this.
anything for your guys’ balls.
kisses.
In my bedroom eyes got some toob loob and a king size bed.
guys…peep the new post.
what the fuck is going on at the HQ?
Al - I didn’t know that you’re one of those people who can’t stop bleeding. I’m sorry.
Bedroom brown eyes get KY. Y? You know Y?
that’s homophiliac, Jack…GOD…IDIOT!
The Mighty One swears there is a chapter where Conan deflowers three virgins in the muck of a dead gigantic slug! WITH HIS TONGUE!
Wasn’t that already an episode of Enterprise?
Just got me some free red wine. Gonna have a sideways party WITH BLOOD.
She is so hot. I am her big fan. Just saw her profile on millionaire dating site WealthyRomance.com last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.