BIG ERN VS. THE JESUS
01.25.08This is the fake trailer for McCracken vs. Jesus, pitting Kingpin‘s Big Ern McCracken (Bill Murray) against Jesus Quintana (John Turturro) from The Big Lebowski. Dear Hollywood, why can’t you make this instead of Meet the Spartans?
You know, the Jesus is so awesome that I’d probably let him molest my children. I mean, I’m just saying. I’m gonna be a great father.
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![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2012/02/Werner-herzog-chicken-choke-150x150.jpg)
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Rose in the bowling ball > Pedophilia
just barely
Pauly, you are D2M.
I didn’t want to tell you guys this, because it would make me look too cool, but I was in a bowling league for three years. I had a 72 average. I also was in a squash club and a badminton club. Cool. As. Dying young.
Pauly, you are D2M.
I kid. I kid. I like kids.
Meet the Spartans opens today! Who else is going to see the first showing?
Nobody fucks with the Jesus
Seriously, Fek. Replace that D with an A and turn that frown upside down.
Mark it zero.
This isn’t fuckin’ Vietnam Walter….
SHUT THE FUCK UP
DONNIEFEK!There I go, dursting the entire site again. Hello? Where’d everybody go, goddammit?
I think everyone realized that a Big Lebowski quote-off isn’t as fun as it used to be.
Damn Stone! Don’t sneak up on me like that! I thought I was alone here.
::zipping up pants, act like nothing happened::
I think everyone realized that a Big Lebowski quote-off isn’t as fun as it used to be
It’s Friday SS. That means that I don’t work, I don’t get in a car, I don’t fucking ride in a car, I don’t pick up the phone, I don’t turn on the oven, and I sure as shit DONT FUCKING POST A COMMENT! Shomer fucking shabbos!
Pauly proves me wrong. That was a good one.
It’s a fucking show dog, it has fucking papers!
The home page for myspace is all fagged out with How She Move
goodnesscrap.Consider yourself warned.
This one is all Sydney White’d out. When I hate a movie I like to pretend the lead actress has Frida Kahlo facial hair and the lead actor is made of gelatin. She’s all debonair and he’s a wobbly and yet they still have a happy ending. It gives me hope.
Hey, that "Jesus" guy from the clip is on the banner ad to. Is he supposed be famous or somthing? Should I know who he is?
*too
*something
I apologize. My eyes aren’t functioning properly again.
i am the walrus
Don’t be fatuous people Jesus would pwn Big Ern. Then Molest his foster kids.
the china man is not the issue here
In I’m a Lebowski, You’re a Lebowski, the comdendium of all things dude, Turturo said that he wanted to make a film just about the Jesus. He had talked to the Coen bros about it but they seemed ambivilant. Cal the Coens, tel them to let the Jesus go!
Once again, I’d like to take this moment to thank Jacktion! for pointing out to me that my handle, Nominus, is also an anagram for "I Munson". Makes my name even better than I realized. Thanks again, brother!
What the Fuck!?!?!
None of you A-holes had the decency to tell me about this sooner.
That is the Last straw.
I was gonna Fuck you on Saturday, now you’ll just have to wait until Wednesday, cause that doesn’t matter to the Jesus.
Actually Funnier with my Jesus avy from your nemesis site.
But that doesn’t matter to the Jesus either.
Meet the Spartans looks like got bukkaked by wild stallions. It looks like a fucking explosion at an icing factory.
Now, The Jesus. That’s a movie I would
copy the DVDpay to see. That scene where he had a huge boner and had to inform the neighborhood he was a sex offender was priceless.