science geek, get the fuck outta here. take the rest of the day to figure out what you did.
12.21.07 at 2:52 pm
Science Geek
It will suck…but Apatow AND Smigel…maybe? Just maybe?
12.21.07 at 2:53 pm
bryce
And Lance, 4 word posts. You are better than that…
12.21.07 at 2:53 pm
Science Geek
don’t be a hater
12.21.07 at 2:55 pm
Lalala I can't hear you!
We don’t hate you. We pity you. But we still don’t want you near us in case retardation is catching.
12.21.07 at 2:58 pm
baedo
ha HA! ‘blow’! that’s hilarious. ’cause he’s holding a blow dryer, right! hot DAMN this shit is funny!…wh- what’s that? oh, ‘adam sandler blows?’ right right right.
12.21.07 at 3:03 pm
Stone Soup
This poster reminds me of a true story. Before I married my ex wife, we were living together. We were fighting about something stupid while she was putting make-up on. During the heat of the fight, she charged at me, making threatening gestures with a mascara brush as if it was a switchblade. I fell over laughing. This, of course, only made her more angry. So did my continued existence, though. Bitch.
12.21.07 at 3:05 pm
LeapinLizards
Ok, so here’s a toss-up: Adam Sandler is annoying and talentless, yes, but it seems that while he’s making movies Jimmy Fallon is not. Does this make Adam Sandler a greater good for society?
One time for your mind!
12.21.07 at 3:14 pm
OnorableMention
Know what I just noticed? You can’t actually see the full title here. Good job marketing department! Now I know that if I want to see Adam Sandler do a funny accent and make jokes that a retarded 3rd grader would find stale, I can look for a movie called "You don’t mess with the" and avoid that steaming pile of crap that the retarded 3rd grader is trying to eat called "You Don’t Mess With The Zohan"
12.21.07 at 3:14 pm
wwbd
this thread dursted long before it even started, thanks science queef.
12.21.07 at 3:15 pm
B.K.
Hey, everybody. If I disappear for an inordinate amount of time again, know that I wish you a happy Jesus Birthday. Or that oil thing for the Jews. Whatever.
12.21.07 at 3:26 pm
Science Geek
Sorry to ruin the thread wwbd, I hope you can rebound on the next one. I am going to go home and think about what I did and hope that I do better next time. I really take this commenting thing serious and I really want to do better. This is an extremely important endeavor and my careless actions can only cause harm to those in the way. Please except my apology.
12.21.07 at 3:26 pm
JHC
What the fuck is going on here!?!?! I do some fucking work and all of the sudden, we’re letting retards post here now? I thought I was clear on this in the last meeting, NO TARDS! All they do is eat all of the sugar cookies, drink all the punch and leave trails of slobber everywhere they go. We need to tighten this ship up people! All in favor or beating science fag upside the head…..
12.21.07 at 3:30 pm
Science Geek
Oh, I see what you guys are doing. You are taking my screen name, Science Geek, and changing the Geek part to more insulting names, like queef or fag. Clever.
12.21.07 at 3:32 pm
Koru
Hey, if you want to come play with the big boys and girls, you have to put on your big boy (or girl, whichever you prefer) undies.
12.21.07 at 3:32 pm
Lalala I can't hear you!
As clever as fist? I hope so. I think that was what MLK jr was talking about when dreaming those dreams of his.
12.21.07 at 3:34 pm
Nominus
Mr. Science Geek: You of all people should know that because everything was entangled at the moment of the big bang, everything is still quantumly entangled to this very day, no matter the distance. Thus, you being a retard effects us all. I for one am not happy that I am quantumly entangled with Fek’s penis, but I have to either live with it, or pay someone to cut it off. What all this means is either stop being a retard, or I’ll have to hire dub dub to cut off your penis as well.
12.21.07 at 3:36 pm
Lalala I can't hear you!
Nom, your theory works, except by the fact that Fek’s penis can never be destroyed (that whole energy not created nor deastroyed thing). It will live forever. Not a comforting thought. If you’re bored though, go for it. Better than watching sitcoms anyway.
12.21.07 at 3:37 pm
wwbd
oh god your going to be one of those commenters. the ones where you take everything people say and reply in a nonfunny, nonthreatening, ’witty/sarcastic’ manner. alright, lets get this over with;
me: youre a fag/homo/queer/friendlesss douche
you: blah blah ‘sarcasm’ blah blah
me: youre still pretty gay
you: i have no friends ;[*
FIN
*that’s what i hear in my head, along with the emoticon.
12.21.07 at 3:37 pm
Koru
Actually, Dub’d do it for free.
he’s cool like dat.
and,
yo (he’s) funk like dat (he’s) fat like dat (he’s) in like dat Cause (he) swing(s) like dat
12.21.07 at 3:39 pm
Science Geek
Thanks Nominus…I get it now. From this point on I will try to stop my retardation.
I was so excited to finally be the first one on a post that I lost my mental capacity and went for it. Lesson learned. Please tell dub dub to leave my penis alone.
I guess I will have to get used to the tough love.
12.21.07 at 3:40 pm
Stone Soup
These are the rules that have been handed down for generations, Science Geek. Yay, since the days of the text-only bulletin board, whence a poster is deemed punishable for offenses otherwise seen as laughable, their name is thereby open for mocking. For this is the only immediate and palpable penance others may inflict without cause for recollection beyond insults shared in the third grade.
And yes, Science Geek, you have officially been tried and convicted of degrading our perfect society by entering an intial post of "Fist". While this act is not only acceptable, but encouraged elsewhere on the internet, our utopian way of life frowns upon it, and therefore you AND your screen name. For we are the pinacle of taste and humor. Look upon us with awe and inspiration, and strive to better yourself in response.
12.21.07 at 3:42 pm
Nominus
Please tell dub dub to leave my penis alone
I’ll try. But telling dubdub to leave a penis alone is like telling Ron Goldman not to die.
12.21.07 at 3:42 pm
Lalala I can't hear you!
Everyone, that was Stone Soup with his lost gospel of web religiousosity, the King James version. Available in paperback.
12.21.07 at 3:42 pm
Science Geek
WWBD, we really got off on the wrong foot. Here is how I would direct the conversation…
you: youre a fag/homo/queer/friendlesss douche
me: no, you’re a fag/homo/queer/friendless douche
you: youre still pretty gay
me: you’re still pretty gay too
12.21.07 at 3:44 pm
RoboPanda
HAHHDEN THE FUCK UP.
12.21.07 at 3:44 pm
Lalala I can't hear you!
dub: youre a fag/homo/queer/friendlesss douche
SG: no, you’re a fag/homo/queer/friendless douche
dub: youre still pretty gay
SG: you’re still pretty gay too
me: lalala… look something totally unrelated that happened once to me. True story.
12.21.07 at 3:44 pm
Koru
I hereby nominate Soup as our official Good Will Ambassador.
He takes the sting out of our bite.
12.21.07 at 3:47 pm
baedo
lala: shit! the ‘gospel according to stone‘ is in paperback!? i’ve been lugging this fucking hard-bound tome around!? time to trade up dammit.
12.21.07 at 3:54 pm
Fek'lhr
Delayed:
BONG!!!!!!!!!!!
(Guess for whom.)
12.21.07 at 3:55 pm
Lalala I can't hear you!
Yes. But the paper quality is not as good. Plus, it’s hard to stop a mugger with a paperback… unfortunately paper cuts are only threatening to hemophiliacs. Blue bloods, the rich cousins of inbred trailer trash.
12.21.07 at 3:55 pm
RoboPanda
It’s for me again isn’t it? Empty Today Sponge :(
12.21.07 at 3:59 pm
baedo
this flimsy paper in the leather-bound makes great ‘emergency’ wraps for the trees. i’ve met some of those blue-bloods (as it were)…all pasty and translucent…almost goth.
12.21.07 at 4:02 pm
Lalala I can't hear you!
And always wearing purple. Effing royalty with all their tiaras and private planes AND they get a colour. I want a colour for the working poor. Poor Man’s Grey. Black Lung Black is the colour for miners. Putrid Green-Pink is Paris Hilton’s.
12.21.07 at 4:04 pm
Stone Soup
Yay, my children – for it is my honor to be thy good will ambassador. And remember, I can’t be an ambassador without ASS. Ladies?
12.21.07 at 4:05 pm
baedo
‘Pneumoniultramicroscopicsiliconiosis black’? how about ‘Proletariat beige’? YUGOs for everone!
12.21.07 at 4:05 pm
Nominus
I really feel like quitting my job right now. You guys think I could probably qualify for disability, right?
12.21.07 at 4:07 pm
Lalala I can't hear you!
Only if you pluck up the courage to chop off a limb.
12.21.07 at 4:08 pm
baedo
i’m reminded of one of my favorite simpsons
bart- oh i’m so BORED!
milhouse- w-wait till we’re teenagers. THEN we’ll be happy.
12.21.07 at 4:10 pm
Jacktion!
Seriously, you guys fucking suck without me around to save you.
12.21.07 at 4:11 pm
Nominus
I don’t understand why they even had me come in today. The only thing thats going on here is Inventory in the production area. I’m just sitting at my computer, not having anything to draw up.
12.21.07 at 4:11 pm
Lalala I can't hear you!
Jack! look at the nomination page.
12.21.07 at 4:12 pm
Lalala I can't hear you!
I’m going book shopping. You know what that means! Books. Yeah, kind of obvious.
12.21.07 at 4:14 pm
Jacktion!
You just had to use it again, didn’t you?
My name is Jacktion, and I appproved this message.
12.21.07 at 4:15 pm
Nominus
guess what Jack!…
Chicken Butt. And yes, I made this up.
12.21.07 at 4:17 pm
Jacktion!
My name is Jacktion, and I misspelled "approved".
12.21.07 at 4:18 pm
Jacktion!
My name is Jacktion, and I’ve been watching too many political ads.
12.21.07 at 4:34 pm
Fek'lhr
Guy’cha! This guy at work gets all bent out of shape when you make gay/femme-guy jokes because his father-in-law is gay (WTF?). The Mighty Fek’lhr resolved this by kicking him in the nuts and saying, "Oooo…snap!"
12.21.07 at 4:36 pm
baedo
need to go…need to go!
12.21.07 at 4:47 pm
Ricky
win pepple ashk meh whah ah tawk funnuh, ah shay eetsh cuzzuh muh daveeted sheptum, lahk fettee magee! um gay um gay um gay!
Hey Fek, tell him one of the queers you talk to online says "HAHHDEN THE FUCK UP."
Be sure to emphasize that you talk to queers online.
12.21.07 at 4:59 pm
Butters
I guess I’m a bit late to the party once more. But Science Geek seems genuinely contrite, and I recall him making humorous, non-"fist" comments on threads before, so we should give him another chance. Not that my opinion matters…I just like to see my name in print.
GRRR JOHN HURT!!
12.21.07 at 5:07 pm
jokerswild
HAHDEN THE FUCK UP! is my mantra for the new year. It truly is a multi-use, diverse, and efficient tool with which to combat pussification in our society.
Paperboy: I want my 2 dollars.
me: HAHDEN THE FUCK UP!
Checkout lady: I’m sorry you have more than 10 items and this is an express lane.
Science Geek: Fist!
me: You’re a fuckin dumbass. Go back to whence you came and don’t return till you’ve learned better.
12.21.07 at 5:07 pm
Fek'lhr
…
Robo, did you just "come out"?
12.21.07 at 5:07 pm
jokerswild
and . . . HAHDEN THE FUCK UP!
12.21.07 at 5:10 pm
Fek'lhr
BTW, there is a new post you vodka drinking commie pinkos.
12.21.07 at 5:11 pm
jokerswild
dammit, you fekked my timing up and destroyed the rhythm of the prose. dammit to hell.
also, just me or adam sandler look kinda like patrick dempsey here? maybe a bit of McJewey?
12.21.07 at 5:14 pm
Fek'lhr
Hahden the fek up!
12.21.07 at 5:27 pm
jokerswild
Fek you, you fekkin fek!
12.21.07 at 6:49 pm
Vince
RoboPanda: I just left Target, where I bought… you guessed it, a RoboPanda. I had no idea it was real. Your smack is so much fresher now.
12.21.07 at 7:07 pm
Science Geek
Butters, I think you are a truly brilliant man.
To everyone else…sorry again for my retardedness. The drool has been wiped and the sugar cookies put down.
Peace out bitches!
12.21.07 at 8:17 pm
Nominus
Science Geek: Worry not too much. Others have typed "Fist!" here before and been able to sort of redeem themselves. It may be a long, hard* road ahead, but if you want it bad enough, it can be done.
*hehe
12.22.07 at 6:37 pm
Jacktion!
Butters, I think you are a truly brilliant man.
What the fuck?Did you lie about being a woman, Butters?
I don’t know who to believe anymore!
12.23.07 at 5:34 am
Charlie Bronze
I think Science Geek has fallen into the believing Butters to be a guy trap. She’s a girl. She is a girl, isn’t she? Although, naturally, i associate the name with the brilliantly timid character from South Park.
![[avatar]](http://p.uproxxcdn.com/photo/257/thumb)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/grown-ups-2-has-a-trailer-now-should-be-called-groan-ups-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/your-mid-week-guide-to-dvd-and-streaming-paranormal-activity-at-hotel-transylvania-filmdrunk-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/01/Groot-and-Rocket-150x150.jpg)
![[image]](http://cdn.fd.uproxx.com/wp-content/thumbnails/130/110/2013/05/the-razzies-nominees-have-been-announced-for-2013-150x150.jpg)
fist!
as long as i dont have to pay for it im cool
science geek, get the fuck outta here. take the rest of the day to figure out what you did.
It will suck…but Apatow AND Smigel…maybe? Just maybe?
And Lance, 4 word posts. You are better than that…
don’t be a hater
We don’t hate you. We pity you. But we still don’t want you near us in case retardation is catching.
ha HA! ‘blow’! that’s hilarious. ’cause he’s holding a blow dryer, right! hot DAMN this shit is funny!…wh- what’s that? oh, ‘adam sandler blows?’ right right right.
This poster reminds me of a true story. Before I married my ex wife, we were living together. We were fighting about something stupid while she was putting make-up on. During the heat of the fight, she charged at me, making threatening gestures with a mascara brush as if it was a switchblade. I fell over laughing. This, of course, only made her more angry. So did my continued existence, though. Bitch.
Ok, so here’s a toss-up: Adam Sandler is annoying and talentless, yes, but it seems that while he’s making movies Jimmy Fallon is not. Does this make Adam Sandler a greater good for society?
One time for your mind!
Know what I just noticed? You can’t actually see the full title here. Good job marketing department! Now I know that if I want to see Adam Sandler do a funny accent and make jokes that a retarded 3rd grader would find stale, I can look for a movie called "You don’t mess with the" and avoid that steaming pile of crap that the retarded 3rd grader is trying to eat called "You Don’t Mess With The Zohan"
this thread dursted long before it even started, thanks science queef.
Hey, everybody. If I disappear for an inordinate amount of time again, know that I wish you a happy Jesus Birthday. Or that oil thing for the Jews. Whatever.
Sorry to ruin the thread wwbd, I hope you can rebound on the next one. I am going to go home and think about what I did and hope that I do better next time. I really take this commenting thing serious and I really want to do better. This is an extremely important endeavor and my careless actions can only cause harm to those in the way. Please except my apology.
What the fuck is going on here!?!?! I do some fucking work and all of the sudden, we’re letting retards post here now? I thought I was clear on this in the last meeting, NO TARDS! All they do is eat all of the sugar cookies, drink all the punch and leave trails of slobber everywhere they go. We need to tighten this ship up people! All in favor or beating science fag upside the head…..
Oh, I see what you guys are doing. You are taking my screen name, Science Geek, and changing the Geek part to more insulting names, like queef or fag. Clever.
Hey, if you want to come play with the big boys and girls, you have to put on your big boy (or girl, whichever you prefer) undies.
As clever as fist? I hope so. I think that was what MLK jr was talking about when dreaming those dreams of his.
Mr. Science Geek: You of all people should know that because everything was entangled at the moment of the big bang, everything is still quantumly entangled to this very day, no matter the distance. Thus, you being a retard effects us all. I for one am not happy that I am quantumly entangled with Fek’s penis, but I have to either live with it, or pay someone to cut it off. What all this means is either stop being a retard, or I’ll have to hire dub dub to cut off your penis as well.
Nom, your theory works, except by the fact that Fek’s penis can never be destroyed (that whole energy not created nor deastroyed thing). It will live forever. Not a comforting thought. If you’re bored though, go for it. Better than watching sitcoms anyway.
oh god your going to be one of those commenters. the ones where you take everything people say and reply in a nonfunny, nonthreatening, ’witty/sarcastic’ manner. alright, lets get this over with;
me: youre a fag/homo/queer/friendlesss douche
you: blah blah ‘sarcasm’ blah blah
me: youre still pretty gay
you: i have no friends ;[*
FIN
*that’s what i hear in my head, along with the emoticon.
Actually, Dub’d do it for free.
he’s cool like dat.
and,
yo (he’s) funk like dat
(he’s) fat like dat
(he’s) in like dat
Cause (he) swing(s) like dat
Thanks Nominus…I get it now. From this point on I will try to stop my retardation.
I was so excited to finally be the first one on a post that I lost my mental capacity and went for it. Lesson learned. Please tell dub dub to leave my penis alone.
I guess I will have to get used to the tough love.
These are the rules that have been handed down for generations, Science Geek. Yay, since the days of the text-only bulletin board, whence a poster is deemed punishable for offenses otherwise seen as laughable, their name is thereby open for mocking. For this is the only immediate and palpable penance others may inflict without cause for recollection beyond insults shared in the third grade.
And yes, Science Geek, you have officially been tried and convicted of degrading our perfect society by entering an intial post of "Fist". While this act is not only acceptable, but encouraged elsewhere on the internet, our utopian way of life frowns upon it, and therefore you AND your screen name. For we are the pinacle of taste and humor. Look upon us with awe and inspiration, and strive to better yourself in response.
Please tell dub dub to leave my penis alone
I’ll try. But telling dubdub to leave a penis alone is like telling Ron Goldman not to die.
Everyone, that was Stone Soup with his lost gospel of web religiousosity, the King James version. Available in paperback.
WWBD, we really got off on the wrong foot. Here is how I would direct the conversation…
you: youre a fag/homo/queer/friendlesss douche
me: no, you’re a fag/homo/queer/friendless douche
you: youre still pretty gay
me: you’re still pretty gay too
HAHHDEN THE FUCK UP.
dub: youre a fag/homo/queer/friendlesss douche
SG: no, you’re a fag/homo/queer/friendless douche
dub: youre still pretty gay
SG: you’re still pretty gay too
me: lalala… look something totally unrelated that happened once to me. True story.
I hereby nominate Soup as our official Good Will Ambassador.
He takes the sting out of our bite.
lala: shit! the ‘gospel according to stone‘ is in paperback!? i’ve been lugging this fucking hard-bound tome around!? time to trade up dammit.
Delayed:
BONG!!!!!!!!!!!
(Guess for whom.)
Yes. But the paper quality is not as good. Plus, it’s hard to stop a mugger with a paperback… unfortunately paper cuts are only threatening to hemophiliacs. Blue bloods, the rich cousins of inbred trailer trash.
It’s for me again isn’t it? Empty Today Sponge :(
this flimsy paper in the leather-bound makes great ‘emergency’ wraps for the trees. i’ve met some of those blue-bloods (as it were)…all pasty and translucent…almost goth.
And always wearing purple. Effing royalty with all their tiaras and private planes AND they get a colour. I want a colour for the working poor. Poor Man’s Grey. Black Lung Black is the colour for miners. Putrid Green-Pink is Paris Hilton’s.
Yay, my children – for it is my honor to be thy good will ambassador. And remember, I can’t be an ambassador without ASS. Ladies?
‘Pneumoniultramicroscopicsiliconiosis black’? how about ‘Proletariat beige’? YUGOs for everone!
I really feel like quitting my job right now. You guys think I could probably qualify for disability, right?
Only if you pluck up the courage to chop off a limb.
i’m reminded of one of my favorite simpsons
bart- oh i’m so BORED!
milhouse- w-wait till we’re teenagers. THEN we’ll be happy.
Seriously, you guys fucking suck without me around to save you.
I don’t understand why they even had me come in today. The only thing thats going on here is Inventory in the production area. I’m just sitting at my computer, not having anything to draw up.
Jack! look at the nomination page.
I’m going book shopping. You know what that means! Books. Yeah, kind of obvious.
You just had to use it again, didn’t you?
My name is Jacktion, and I appproved this message.
guess what Jack!…
Chicken Butt. And yes, I made this up.
My name is Jacktion, and I misspelled "approved".
My name is Jacktion, and I’ve been watching too many political ads.
Guy’cha! This guy at work gets all bent out of shape when you make gay/femme-guy jokes because his father-in-law is gay (WTF?). The Mighty Fek’lhr resolved this by kicking him in the nuts and saying, "Oooo…snap!"
need to go…need to go!
win pepple ashk meh whah ah tawk funnuh, ah shay eetsh cuzzuh muh daveeted sheptum, lahk fettee magee! um gay um gay um gay!
win pepple ashk meh whah ah fak peeks, ah shay eetsh cuzzuh muh mam eesh a ded nassi hooker wid gawlic sheesher cawkbreff.
Hey Fek, tell him one of the queers you talk to online says "HAHHDEN THE FUCK UP."
Be sure to emphasize that you talk to queers online.
I guess I’m a bit late to the party once more. But Science Geek seems genuinely contrite, and I recall him making humorous, non-"fist" comments on threads before, so we should give him another chance. Not that my opinion matters…I just like to see my name in print.
GRRR JOHN HURT!!
HAHDEN THE FUCK UP! is my mantra for the new year. It truly is a multi-use, diverse, and efficient tool with which to combat pussification in our society.
Paperboy: I want my 2 dollars.
me: HAHDEN THE FUCK UP!
Checkout lady: I’m sorry you have more than 10 items and this is an express lane.
Science Geek: Fist!
me: You’re a fuckin dumbass. Go back to whence you came and don’t return till you’ve learned better.
…
Robo, did you just "come out"?
and . . . HAHDEN THE FUCK UP!
BTW, there is a new post you vodka drinking commie pinkos.
dammit, you fekked my timing up and destroyed the rhythm of the prose. dammit to hell.
also, just me or adam sandler look kinda like patrick dempsey here? maybe a bit of McJewey?
Hahden the fek up!
Fek you, you fekkin fek!
RoboPanda: I just left Target, where I bought… you guessed it, a RoboPanda. I had no idea it was real. Your smack is so much fresher now.
Butters, I think you are a truly brilliant man.
To everyone else…sorry again for my retardedness. The drool has been wiped and the sugar cookies put down.
Peace out bitches!
Science Geek: Worry not too much. Others have typed "Fist!" here before and been able to sort of redeem themselves. It may be a long, hard* road ahead, but if you want it bad enough, it can be done.
*hehe
Butters, I think you are a truly brilliant man.
What the fuck? Did you lie about being a woman, Butters?
I don’t know who to believe anymore!
I think Science Geek has fallen into the believing Butters to be a guy trap. She’s a girl. She is a girl, isn’t she? Although, naturally, i associate the name with the brilliantly timid character from South Park.