Paul Reuben is reportedly in the "pre-pre-pre-production" stage of a pair of Pee Wee Herman flicks, one for kids, another for adults. He hopes to reprise his role as Pee-Wee, but does have a realistic backup plan:
"My second option is to have Johnny Depp play Pee-Wee." He says that he has even approached Depp about it, and that Johnny told him: "Let me think about it."
Hmm, sounds like a definite "maybe". Who do you have in mind for a director, Pee Wee?
"I have talked to Tim [Burton] about one of them about a year ago. But Tim is booked. I think he would be interested in it, but he’s really busy."
Ahh yes, and I imagine the woman he asked out last week "has to wash her hair," and the child he tried to give a ride home in his van "doesn’t really like candy." Really, Pee-Wee, it’s not you, it’s us. We just don’t like you in that way.
Poor guy, gets caught jackin it one stinkin time and it kills his career. Such bullshit. I mean, if a guy can’t whack off in an adult theatre, where can he? Those fascists down at the city pool sure aren’t having it.
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Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure is one of the greatest films of all time.
I am suprised Tim, being the director of the prior movies, didnt give him more than that. But, his ship sailed long ago.
JLA/All American Super Hero Team Justice WTF will get made before Burton/Depp sign on to do Pee-Wee…
Lance: Kudos, you PShop Wizard!
I would post more, but I’m all booked up. Have your people call my people
Bad Places to Masturbate:
I’ve been in talks to play Pee Wee, Her Man in a series of porno flicks. They said my size is perfect, but the only potential problem is my stamina, or lack thereof.
Jack! Cue training montage set to Eye of the Tiger.
YOU NEED POWERTHIRST!
It’s the Eye of the Tiger, it’s the SPLOOGE!
I would pay extra to see Johnny Depp as PeeWee.
I
wouldhave payed extra for Johnny Depp to pee on me with his wee-wee.Grrrrr………Wino forever!!!
I
havewould pay huge amounts justto see himsleepact in a movieJHC, stop that, your scaring me
Today is Blossom’s birfday! Happy birthday you big nosed cutie you.
When is 21 Jump Street going to be made into a movie?
And the wheels are set into motion…
tommorrow is my daughters birthday. she does not have a big nose.
The Mighty Fek’lhr was never more proud of Pee Wee than when He found out Pee Wee had been whacking it at an adult theater. However, Pee Wee might have chose a better movie (Bambi).
Sorry Eib. I seem to have misplaced my funny today and am desperately trying to find it.
::jhc looks around the office confused and somewhat frightened while clutching his E.T. trapper keeper::
I’m a Pisces.
aw, a trapper keeper? you are forgiven, as it was a little funny, i just wanted to point out that my tiny ginger haired child has a button nose as opposed to blossoms honker
My birthday was in June, but Christmas is coming up, if any of you feel the need to get me a gift.
I’m sure she’s very cute Eib. Just like her mommy’s avatar. For the record, it’s nice to know that Eib isn’t a just a dicktease as evidenced by her having a child.
I really think his ideas are sound. I think another PeeWee movie would be great. Tim Burton Directing would be fine. And, although I think Ruebens playing PeeWee would be a must, I do think that Johnny Depp playing PeeWee would be cool too.
Okay, now take all the words I just said, and rearrange them so that it’s a funny joke. I’m sure it could be done.
::JHC presses delete button on "a just" on previous post to no avail::
GODDAMN NEW-FANGLED COMPUTERS AND INTERWEBS!!!
And Jack!: like I already said, I’ve made you all a batch of PuppyChow for christmas. You just have to pick it up next time you’re in Topeka, and it has to be before I eat it all.
The Mighty Fek’lhr’s Top Ten Movies NOT To Spank It To Off In Whose Camper They Were Whacking:
Klingonfag)jacking off may have gotten him into trouble but it was exchanging 19th century homoerotic child porn with Jeffrey Jones (principle from Ferris Bueller) that finished his work with children.
The Mighty Fek’lhr’s Top Ten Movies He Cannot Make To The End Without Whacking It:
"Word’sch goin’ around you guysch are recruiting schuper heroesch."
+10 for correct answer on what movie that is from
or one night of passionate love if you would rather (for the ladies)
and by one night I mean ’bout 3-4 minutes. 1-2 if you don’t need any cuddling post-coitus.
Mystery men. Easy.
19th century homoerotic child porn with Jeffrey Jones
When did Paul Ruebens get busted doing that? I don’t remember hearing about it. I know about the Principal from Bueller, but that was only like 2 years ago, and I would think I woulda heard about peewee being involved.
Nicely done Luch. I suppose you want your 10 right? Right? Please want the 10.
Dammit I was about to answer Mystery Men…
I want my two minutes!
Sorry Luch. The judges have convened and decided that you have not capitalized Men in your answer, and therefore they can’t accept your answer.
Koru, c’mon down.
I want my two minutes!
JHC: Want me to take care of that for ya? I’m a good friend.
JHC: And you are not a good friend. Jerk.
Nom: From the sound of Koru’s voice in my head and her avatar, it just may take both of us. Unless you want to "give" luch his 10 instead?
dammit! My CapitLizAtioN alwaYs FUcks EVeryThing uP!
*claps hands* I won!!!
Can’t we just share.
*strokes penis* I won!!!
I’m interested in the TMI from Fek’lhr that he spanks it to Wrath of Khan.
At which point do you find you have to bash one out? Is it the "KHAN!!!!" or the "FIRE!" or both?
I don’t need to masturbate when Shatner yells "KHAN!!!"
bryce-The Mighty Fek’lhr wonders how you can make it past the Kobyashi Maru??? BOING!!!
Or that part when that kid puts the bloody handprint on Kirk…BOOSH!
Response to JHC: I got 5 on it!
Wait. What?
I think we have different tastes… I find I have to rub one out when they do the Row, Row, Row Your Boat camping scene in the other movie. Each to their own I suppose.
GRRRR GAY CAMPING!!!
Is it worth renting the Star Trek series just to keep up with this room?
The Mighty Fek’lhr gets a big rubbery one each time the Borg Queen blows on Data’s arm.
-10 to bryce for Star Trek V reference. BOOOOOOOOOO!
SMB: Just the even numbered ones…
Fek is the biggest nerd I’ve come across on the internets. Kudos, Sir.
(And by come across, I mean BOOSH!)
bryce, you’re right, the face makes me think you are serious about masturbating. You totally didn’t strike me as the type that would beat off when you had the bunny ears. With the ears, I figured you as the type that would have others beat you off instead.
Anyone know where i can get bunny ears?
nominus (2:50:32 PM): It’s like one of those optical illusions. Everyone see’s a vase, but I see ten guys giving each other blowjobs.
How is that everyone thinks that I’m gay, and not Nominus?
I think it’s the exclamation mark. You have gay punctuation.
Same goes for SMB! Maybe you two should go shopping for extra tight Ts together?
Would gay punctuation be spunktuation?
You know, because gay dudes eat each other’s spunk.
At least, that’s what Nominus told me.
True story: There’s a normal looking forty-year old who wanders around the mall on Saturdays. When I say normal, I mean minues the pink bunny ears he wears. I guess to could buy them from him, but I would try other options first, like killing a bunny.
H E Y R I C K Y ! ! ! W H A T M O V I E S D O U W H A C K O F F T O ?
Could someone get Lala a candy bar or something. I think her blood sugar might be getting low.
erm…bayshickly awld zawn candy moviesh. gweat awtdersh, awnkel bawck, shtuff like dat.
Just woke up from a nap. That’s right while you guys do the work of the just, I sleep in the afternoon while the sunlight slants across my bed. What a life.
The Mighty Fek’lhr is honoured that bryce considers Him the biggest nerd on the internet. Perhaps people will stop calling Him "Star Wars Kid" now.
Step 1: Find and kill bunny, rip off ears.
Step 2: Staple them to your head.
Step 3: ???????
Step 4: PROFIT!
Jacktion! says
nominus (2:50:32 PM): It’s like one of those optical illusions. Everyone see’s a vase, but I see ten guys giving each other blowjobs.How is that everyone thinks thatI’m gay,and notNominus?There, fixed!
Lalala: Sounds like me in about 10 years….
Oh yeah Lala? While you were napping, I earned a whole $25. Take that.
Lala > JHC’s life
You’ve been sleeping for like 4 hours right?
Nominus says:
Jacktion! saysnominus (2:50:32 PM): It’s like one of those optical illusions. Everyone see’s a vase, but I see ten guys giving each other blowjobs.How is that everyone thinks thatI’m gay, and not Nominus?There, double fixed!
Alls i wear is tight T’s.
Jacktion! says
nominus (2:50:32 PM): It’s like one of those optical illusions. Everyone see’s a vase, but I see ten guys giving each other blowjobs.How is that everyone thinks thatI’m gay,and notNominus?There, fixed!
Classic!
2 hours. Then a half hour of debating whether getting up at all was worth it. I think I made a mistake…
I guess it’s not classic enough, eh Luch?
2 hours. Then a half hour of debating whether getting up at all was worth it. I think I made a mistake…
Well then, I’ll revise my earnings to the correct amount. $12 before taxes and 401k.
$2.32 net. Holy christ! It’s no wonder I’m dumpster diving to eat and fucking fat, smelly chicks for rides to work.
Fuckin’ Gubment.
I was tired from getting my hair cut and buying clothes yesterday, what can I say. Oh yeah, I love my life.
Um, no? Yes? Maybe?
What?
I was just pointing out how rude it is to repost my classic repaired jacktion! comment, then call it classic, then not nominate it. You’re a tease dude. If you were any more of a tease, you’d be an 80′s big hairdo.