As promised, Hellboy 2‘s movie site released a new poster today, this time featuring Abe Sapien, who’s basically a cross between the Pale Man and C3PO.
He also does a video intro, with his voice played by David Hyde Pierce, who’s no stranger to the chamomile, if you catch my drift. Pierce was just named People Magazine’s "Whitest Man Alive" for the 10th straight year and he’s never been photographed with Tim Gunn. Coincidence? Think again, my friend. One time Selma Blair beat David Hyde Pierce in arm wrestling match using only her jaw.
UPDATE: As commenter Lincolnfx points out: David Hyde Pierce actually is not doing Abe Sapien’s voice. A In Hellboy II it is [Doug] Jones’ voice you will hear, Pierce isn’t involved. Jeez, thanks for ruining all my jokes, Professor Fact Guy.
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The Mighty Fek’lhr doesn’t have enough energy for two Star Wars threads in one day…
Oh, who is He kidding??? Hey guys, The Mighty One didn’t know Teri Hatcher was in this movie! ZING-TAGH!
Wow even fish are gay. I knew about dogs being gay but I didn’t know about the fish. I feel more empowered with my new found knowledge and I"m going out to do some good today.
There’s 2 penguins at the NY zoo that are gay.
Pale Man creeps me the fuck out. Teri Hatcher? Moreso.
David Hyde Pierce beat me in an arm wrestling match once and I’m super butch. He’s incredibly strong for a gay and it was only the untrue strength of Blairs Jaw that beat him and he had a cold. He siad to me afterwards, "any other day I’d hace kicked that bitches ass"
true story.
Also, bonobos. Read about them. Nymphos.
Penguins can’t be gay that’s just silly.
Breaking news! David Hyde Pierce was cast as Northstar from Alpha Flight!
google gay penguins.
Well, he is wearing lipstick. That should have been the big tell right there.
incredibly strong for a gay
i dont know why , but thats kinda funny
why is Abe’s poster prettier than Selma’s? wow, fish got ya beat lady
Gay Penguins……..Fucking blows my mind..They have sex…..how does a gay penguin have sex…..I have so many questions.
I feel like sticking chopsticks in his nostrils. You know, for fun.
Hell Boy wasn’t very good, right? So why number 2? It just doesn’t make any sense…
Nom, i am starting to seriously worry about you. Should i call 911?
his face looks a little too relaxed….as I understand it he can’t breath out of the water….he should be sufficating….or maybe he’s already dead.
Crap Bryce, they are always making sequels to crappy stuff
Everyone is wearing Mystery’s goggles!
Yeah, you should eib. But it won’t work, I already ripped the cord out of your wall.
Hellboy was crap, but the comic’s pretty BA Barackus. Hopefully they can pull off a decent sequel.
information on bonobos: plays a major role in Bonobo society, being used as a , a means of and , and as by the females in exchange for food. Bonobos are the only non-human apes to have been observed engaging in all of the following sexual activities: face-to-face (most frequently , then and ), , and . In scientific literature, the female-female sex is often referred to as or , while male-male sex is sometimes referred to as .
This poster is for Sushi 2: Sapien Lives
frig it is supposed to say sexual activity plays a major…
There’s no mention of Barbra Streisand in there, AGB. Where’s Babs?
information on bonobos:
Sexual intercourse plays a major role in Bonobo society, being used as a greeting, a means of conflict resolution and post-conflict reconciliation, and as favors traded by the females in exchange for food. Bonobos are the only non-human apes to have been observed engaging in all of the following sexual activities: face-to-face genital sex (most frequently female-female, then male-female and male-male), tongue kissing, and oral sex.[15] In scientific literature, the female-female sex is often referred to as GG rubbing or genital-genital rubbing, while male-male sex is sometimes referred to as penis fencing.
that passage seemed to be missing lots of key word, agb.
NOm, do not look behind the sofa. I am not there. Look away.
True story: I watched the first hour of Commando last night.
Off topic, but sometimes I read the commentary on other sites and it makes me die a little on the inside. I thought I’d share this gem someone shares about Justice League:
I’m less concerned with his looks than with his acting experience. I’d imagine they can make him look a little more "rugged" if they change his hair and he loses the glamor shot make-up. Need to see some better pictures of him. I am a big DC comic fan so I’d like to point out that the young Bruce is thought of as a bit of a good looking pretty boy by the average Gotham City citizen. I want this movie to be good so badly :[
Jesus Christ, I just know this guy plays Quidditch for Vassar. Thanks for not being so fucking lame, you guys.
Dohn’t deestuhb my frehnd. Hee ees dead ty-uhd!
penis fencing……hahahahahahaha
Lance, it wasn’t that off topic. I mean I just posted information on a rare primate.
Was that commenter a guy, Lance? Nothing about that wasn’t gay. DC comics.
I bet that guy has done his fair share of penis fencing…
Great news, everyone! The Mighty Fek’lhr is pleased to announce that His Mighty Ship Grethor now has a quidditch team to challenge Vassar! However, we were fresh out of brooms, so the dishonoured Klingon souls come out riding double-sided dildoes and chase a flying rubber fist! Qaplah!
Seriously, though, JLA is so fuckiing gay. There was once an issue of "What If?" where they made The Punisher into Captain America and leader of The Avengers. Even with as flaming emasculated gay that was, it looks like Arnold Schwarzenegger c. 1986 put next to ANY JLA comic.
Fek, I’m in. I’d be lying if I said it’s the first time I’ve chased a giant rubber fist . . .
Bonobo males frequently engage in various forms of male-male genital sex (frot).[19][20][21] One form has two males hang from a tree limb face-to-face while "penis fencing". Frot may also occur where two males rub their penises together while in missionary position. A special form of frot called "rump rubbing" occurs to express reconciliation between two males after a conflict, where they stand back-to-back and rub their scrotal sacs together.
Wow, this place just got WAY creepier.
quit giving me ideas agb.
Maybe they’re not gay, maybe they just like to slap they’re penis’ together…what’s not hetrosexual about that?
I’m just copying and pasting this information from wikipedia. This is educational. I’m trying to get a government grant for Lance.
Umm David Hyde Pierce actually is not doing Abe Sapien’s voice. And in the first one he didn’t even do any press for the film because he thought Doug Jones should have got the credit(since he was mimicking Jones’ voice). In Hellboy II it s Jones’ voice you will hear, Pierce isn’t involved.
That’s funny, one of the dishonoured souls on Grethor is nick-named Bonobo…now The Mighty One knows why! Between that and the JLA comics, guy’Cha!
Hye, fuck you Linkin Logs!
Hye is Klingon for "I fucked your mother last night, kotal!"
thanks for the nod Nom.
Is that monkey ass to ass? wow
Hahahaha…yeah I’m sorry I’m that guy. But hey, somebody has to be him or else you’d risk putting up a pack of lies, which in retrospect, you should do more often, as lying is more fun than the boring truth.