11.30.07 HAHDEN THE F-CK UP, JOKER

Makeup is for bitches and hoes. And I only call you bitches and hoes  because I do not know you individually by name

bitches

This sucks. If Heath Ledger pulls off playing the Joker, he will be known as a respected actor. And steve buschemi is still obscure. At least steve can put on his lipstick straight. He should just kill heath now.

More than once I’ve had to tell myself to "haahden the fahk up".

Mostly after I’ve drank too many Morgan and Cokes and my patented, slam my dick in the closet door hardening technique, has failed. 

The Mighty Fek’lhr feels we have little to complain about. It’s not like they are giving us Jim Carrey as Riddler or something.

"Morgan and Cokes", fuck a duck, you guys in Nebraska are lame. CAPTAIN COKE! PERIOD.

Fek, what is a CAPTAIN COKE?  Perhaps we’re talking about the same thing?

BGRRR…… MITTENS!!!!!! 

"slam my dick in the closet door hardening technique"

wow, bro. that shit is hard. wait…what? 

how exactly does one meet the criteria for "gay man of the year" award? i mean, how far up on the apex of gayness do you have to hike? it’s not like we’ve got a "straight man of the year" award…if we did, it would undoubtedly be based purely on how much "hatch wound" you’ve stabbed with your pink daggar.

f.y.i. - wilt chamberland would "undoubtedly" recieve the "straight man’s lifetime achievment" award. i mean 20,000 ??? are you fucking with me here, or are you trying to ACTUALLY fuck me here, wilt? wilt!!!! answer me!

*chodin let’s go of chamberland’s collar and drops him back into the casket*

I like to picture my Heath Ledger wearing a tuxedo shirt, because I like to party, and I like my gay men of th year to party too.

There is a difference between Gay GQ and GQ in Australia? Every time I pick one of those mags up I expect to flip the page and see some guy on a bear skin rug spreading his cheeks.

…

DOR SHO GHA! I suppose deer skin isn’t good enough for you, your majesty?

*puts His cheeks back together and gets up off of floor* 

I expect to flip the page and see some guy on a bear skin rug spreading his cheeks.

Oh, I see you finally got my christmas card! Happy Holidays! 

But the Joker has always been a Gay character anyway. Probably one of the first and gayest supervillain…

What? Gay means happy. And he’s always laughing and playing ‘jokes’ on people. Duh!

arggggggggggggg.

He’s not ‘Gay’ like Fek’lhr…

The Joker is pretty gay in "Scooby Doo meets batman and robin". But the kid loves it, so, I don’t know how to feel about it or him anymore.

At least he doesn’t fuck dogs like Shaggy.

"Like, far out, mang!"

alright guys i have a predicament here. i fell asleep three hours ago and just woke up because i thought i had to work at 1, turns out i work at 5. what should i do, fall back asleep or stay awake?

predicament 2.0= my manager is hot as fuck, should i 1, put the dub moves on her or 2, slip her the double the ruffies?

I see Heath is adopting the tried and tested head down/eyes up look-at-me-i’m-a-psycho look, most recently used by Olyphant on his Hitman poster. They must teach actors that stuff in, er, stage school. My son* is in a nativity play this year and he’s playing the innkeeper. I’m going to tell him to adopt this look when Joseph and his technicolour donkey and virgin preggo wife roll up at his door. I’ve also rewritten his lines. "No Jews."

* i don’t really have a son but i like to pretend i do, sometimes, so i don’t feel left out at PTA meetings. 

Although I just noticed the banner ad which seems to be trying to sell me Real Jocks! What kind of website is this?!

GRRRR SMOOTH MUSCULAR YOUNG MEN!!!!

I thought that real jocks shit only was here that one day. And it is a gay fitness forum. It doesn’t just seem gay. Lance is playing jokes on us but his selection of advertisers.

dubs,

predicament 1:  back to sleep

preDICKament 2:  slip her one dose of ruffie and put the dub moves on her.  repeat as neccessary to achieve desired results 

Is it me, or does he look like Paul Giamatti in that pic? 

I was on With Leather earlier and they had some banner ads which i thought were for a dancing bear. Turns out it was for a charity that rescues dancing bears. Looks like my imaginary son is going to have to rewrite his letter to Santa.

predicament 1-give yourself the rufies

2-miss work