11.30.07 EW LOSES ALL CREDIBILITY

lol, lance do you have stairs in your house?

Jesus wept

In Hollywood; Getting people to spend money on screaming piles of shit = smarts

"the reach of their ideas beyond the borders of their own careers"

75 years from now Film Appreciation students will be in awe of this man’s ability to throw money at other people’s "original" ideas.  50% of the students’ final grades will hinge on their scene-by-scene analysis of Pearl Harbor.  25% of these papers will be titled "Josh Hartnett’s squinting in Pearl Harbor as metacommentary on Japanopacific hegemony".  100% of students using that title won’t know what that even means, but neither does the professor, so they got an A-.

This list is more of a joke than that chicken who crossed the road. But they are similar, since neither of those jokes are funny. You can’t just make a list of "smartest people" and then it not include any factors that is a real judge of intelligence. Jesus, if luck and a good manager makes you smart, well then, well, I guess I’m still smart. Someone should burn people to the ground.

I mean, Burn entertainment weekly to the ground.

Ha, the Live Search on Josh Hartnett’s name brings up a picture of the dude with his eyes almost closed.  Live Search for the assist.

lol, lance do you have stairs in your house?

Fuck no, I have an elevator powered by Asian chicks.  But I do do a lot of lunges. 

Taken from the comments section on that page:

rafe Thu, Nov 29, 2007 at 04:02 PM EST

I agree with Angelina, Cate B and Jodie are smart women. Meryl, she is a great actress, but she doesnt sound smart.

I dont agree with Ben A, or even Ben Stiller, or even Johnny Depp, I think he is more lucky than smart. Lucky that he got the part in the Pirates.

Most of them, I dont even know, so I dont think they are smart enough coz they are not even famous.

 rafe is the biggest retard in the world. Even bigger than sloth from goonies. I hate idiots who don’t post here, cuz I would make them cry.

This is the Ew equivilant of giving all of Hollywood a rim job.

I think this list was Hollywood giving a big "FUCK YOU" to the writers on strike.

lets post there, and invite them here, so we all can make them cry. Increase Lances traffic and crying! Brilliant!

46. Jeff Walker, Comic-Con impresario

 What the fuck is a Comic-Con impersario? Whatever it is, that guy must be damn smart, to make it onto the list somehow.

Read those comments Eib. I don’t think those commenters would like this site. Let alone have enough brains to correctly key in the web address. But, feel free to try. I will if I can think of anything I want to say about it.

k. I posted a comment inviting them here. I did my part. Maybe someone should post something as a catlyst?

NOm, I think your comment there was the best they had

ok, I did my part as well. I just really want to see you make anyone who isnt me cry.

I made you cry? Awwwwww. Never meant to do that. Was it all the sexual suggestiveness? Cuz if it was, I didn’t mean it. Seriously, theres nothing a guy hates more than blowjobs and anal sex.

Ahaha, i like the last comment I just put up on there. too bad EW has no comments of the week.

fuck this friday.

what’d i miss???

*the rest of filmdrunk lowers their head- fek continues jacking off- DB’s mother just lays there*

…okay, good. looks like i didn’t miss much.

Chodin: You were elected "Most terrible human being in the western hemisphere". Which makes you officially the coolest and most liked person on filmdrunk. Congrats

You just can’t resist taking another cheap shot at our President, can you?  Well, let me tell you this, laughing boy.  If intelligence can be measured by how quickly one can find a child prostitute in a third world country, then I’m Stephen Hawking, Bush is Leonardo Da Vinci and Cheney is fucking Socrates.  (Seriously, he’s got a talent for it.  Some call it a gift.)  Whereas you could be at the first Thailand-hosted Republican National Convention and spend three hours staring at a dimly lit opium den and STILL not see all that sweet non-gender specific ass that lies inside.  So groggy… so pliant… so- Shit!  Potty time.

*tears*

oh gawd…i, i really didn’t think that i would win so i didn’t write anything…

*unravels three-foot scroll*

well first i’d like to thank DB’s dead, nazi mother for always putting out. i’d like to thank my fellow filmDRUNKARDS for their shenanigans. i’d like to thank lance for always pinching me off when i’m halfway in…and last but not least, i would NOT like to thank all those over at "the site we do not speek of". thank you…thank you, praise allah - ala-la-la-la-la-la-la-la-la

Spending your time in a way that makes me money - now you’re thinking, folks.  Way to go.

Does it make me lame that I really wish I could do this?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1q7s4E94-No

Oh, BTW, you owe me 73 cents Lance.